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5 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Culture Shock  
Review by Phil
Rated: E | (2.5)
Hi, with dialogue driven pieces, it can be difficult to create a picture in the readers mind. I think you did a pretty good job, although I would have liked a bit more characterisation and perhaps a few more descriptive passages involving the condo. But I think you caught the character and schematic of the trailer well. If you wanted to achieve your message purely through dialogue, then I think you did a good job.
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Review of Meeting Katy  
Review by Phil
Rated: E | (1.5)
hi, your story is very sad. I felt it was somewhat rushed and would have liked you to have slowed down and described the surroundings, the smells and the people of Kolkata more. I'm guessing English is not your first language, as some of your use of words and syntax is slightly skewed. I would have liked to have seen a more emotional response to the death of the kitten. Perhaps an idea of how the death of a kitten would have registered to the passer-bys. Why was the car driving on the pavement? Is that usual in Kolkata? I think if you broaden the story more and slow your delivery ,as well as adding more atmosphere, I think your story would have more depth and meaning.

Hopes this help you.
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