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18 Public Reviews Given
270 Total Reviews Given
Favorite Genres
fantasy, hard and soft science fiction, romance, young adult
I will not review...
erotica
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of The Dreamer  
Review by Wist
Rated: E | (5.0)
My thoughts:
An interesting flash story and I liked the ending. You used the three must-use words well. After seeing his true abilities, I went back and re-read the beginning--that would be a lot of dangerous disasters he caused, and I fear what they will do with Andy next.

Technical:
I might have put a comma after 'Ok' in the sentence: “Ok.” Andy responded.

Overall an entertaining and smart story. Keep up the good work!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
Review of The Golden Pool  
Review by Wist
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)

*Snow1**Snow1**Snow1*

REVIEW: The Golden Pool
AUTHOR: W.D. Wilcox
TYPE: Short Story For Contest
REVIEWED BY: Wist (SFWG Overseer)
DATE: Thursday February 9, 2006

         All spelling suggestions are based on a U.S. English dictionary.
 
COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS: In Rose Text.

 



         I never got a moment of time to get around to read this before when you entered in that contest, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten it! I wanted to congratulate you for winning it too. I was never good at writing short stories because there never seems to be enough room in them for me to let my Muse completely loose, so if anything I’m going to look around your Port and polish my Short skills in the process from a Pro *Smile*

After reading this, all I can say is wow! This was really good! I can see easily how you won first place with it. It’s fast paced, descriptive and it hits its fantasy elements really well. (I know I’m picking on a Moderator here) but the only thing I feel more need for in this is Death’s physical description, and maybe a bit more on Hollana’s physical features as well. They are amazing characters and I just want to see them entirely before me as if they were just that.

I was biting my nails right to the end, worried witless about the outcome for it seemed almost certain that she was going to lose, but the way Death left in respect of her was perfect. I’m betting Chaos won’t bother her much anymore, either. *Bigsmile*

This is usually the part where I say keep up the amazing writing, but just for you I think it would fit better if I said “I’m feeling dizzy from the circles you’re doing around me for Short Fantasy Stories...” *Laugh* I really need to sharpen my quills in this area more and I think I found just the sharpening stone. *Smile*


 
*Snow1**Snow1**Snow1*



 
                   Wist

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3
3
Review by Wist
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Snow1**Snow1**Snow1*

REVIEW: Stones And Silence
AUTHOR: Dragon Believer
TYPE: Short Story
REVIEWED BY: Wist
DATE: Thursday February 9, 2006
                   All spelling suggestions are based on a U.S. English dictionary.
 
COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS: In Blue Text.
 


That was a nicely done and enjoyable read. The only things I would change is the last few paragraphs towards the end-they seemed a bit speedy. That, and I would get working on some more of it! I want to know where this all leads. If you were to keep it as a short story though, I would add more description to what Sean saw when he was given all those memories. I also really like the idea of having descendants from King Arthur times and the way how Sean had the memories passed onto him. But I found that part really speedy. Maybe you could slow it down a bit by showing a scene where he interacts with the given memories some more, and then of course comes back. I found it amusing how they were looking at the Stones and then suddenly all Sean’s dislike of it came right back at him when he met the Knights from which the stones are related to. I like your characters and how you use dialogue as well. I’m horrible at writing in first person, so I’m gonna follow you around until I can learn a bit. *Smile*

*Star*“He looked like,” I began. I had to pause and think about how to word it exactly. I mean, I didn’t want to sound completely delusional. “He looked like a man in a bathrobe.”

~Well, that’s something you don’t see everyday! *Laugh*

*Star*“You mustn’t.” It was one of the ‘knights’ who was speaking now. One who stood off to the left. He was shorter than the others, and a little younger looking, though with long dark hair that clearly hadn’t been cut in years. “We need you, m’lord.”

~ I was just getting sleepy from being tired and almost yawned, but when I read this my jaw seriously dropped instead... *Laugh* Now if that isn’t a serious effect of good writing, I don’t know what is...

My Blue Marker Speaks:

As such, we had this huge hotel room, with a jacuzzi/Jacuzzi and everything, just on the outer edges of the city.


Keep up the good work DB!


 
*Snow1**Snow1**Snow1*


 
                   Wist

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4
4
Review by Wist
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Now that, was cry-worthy funny! I think I have to give a try at making a Madlib thing in the future for myself.

But what am I doing playing when I'm supposed to be working!?

Now I'm really behind!

(Wist runs around like a mad woman trying to find the notebook pages that she left off on, and crashes into a new, not yet mapped-out Board. Rubbing her sore nose, she returns to coloring it...)

                   Wist
 
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5
5
Review by Wist
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
REVIEW: ONE NIGHT STAND
AUTHOR: Shara
TYPE: Poem
REVIEWED BY: Wist
DATE: Thursday, December 22, 2005 6:42 PM
COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS: In Blue Text.
All spelling suggestions are based on a U.S. English dictionary.


Paths Untrodden/untrodden, Houses/houses abandoned,
Empty footwalks/foot walks, All/all silence no talks,
Weeping frightened breeze,
Your spine it might Freeze/freeze,
The hoots of the owl,
The night that howls,
The chastened moonlight,
Slowly dying in the night, ~I might have put a period here instead.
The sight of unruffled leaves,
The astir shadows of non-existing trees...../trees...

A soft tap knocks my door,
I ask-/ask, "Hello!! Who's there on the floor?"
"I'm lost"-/lost,” He/he answers-
"A shelter I seek-
'Tis cold outside and I'm bleak."

I bring an old candle
With a wispy dying flame,
Now for him any other night
Would never be the same again.

The door opens
And the bells chime-
With the mourns of the night
The very well rhyme...

With a gust of wind
The flames flare
And he catches in my blue eyes
A blazing warm gaze.

He adorns his face
With a handsome grin
And then he receives one
On his way in...

He looks at the locks
That block/blocks my eyesight;
Blown off by the wind
They blend well with the night...

He sits on a chair
His eyes unmoved-
My shy eyelids open
Confessing I'm allured...

More smiles are shared,
Stealthy looks are caught,
Through the hushed silence
Closer we're brought.

He asks for water-
An unfulfilled wish;
For I lie thirsty here
Thriving on crumbs that lie in a broken dish...

The candle burns on,
Its flame yet alive;
Stale air all around-
Now reflecting the dim light.

So close we are
I can feel him breathe;
I lie here so cold
And I can feel his heat...

His hand slowly moves and touches mine,-
A cold shudder moves down his spine;
His throat is then sliced neatly
Oh!! Merciless knife, cant/can’t hear him whine!

As blood trickles down his neck
And his collar with it is drenched,
My cold tongue tastes its warmth
And my thirst for the moment is quenched...

Slowly I walk toward the door,
Waiting for another call from that floor-
Maybe years would pass before another smite
But for me an aeon/eon is just as long as this night...

So I sit on a chair,
A captive in my own lair-
My cold youth would always gleam
Forever in the dead candle beam...


Paths Untrodden, houses abandoned
Empty footwalks/foot walks, all silence no talks...../talks...


~This poem is officially my second favorite. I like how you pace it and tell the story as a poem with much detail and imagery. A great vampire poem always hits the spot! Keep up the great writing, and see you inside SFWG!


                   Wist
 
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6
6
Review of PERPETUAL LOVE..  
Review by Wist
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
REVIEW: PERPETUAL LOVE..
AUTHOR: Shara
TYPE: Poem
REVIEWED BY: Wist
DATE: Thursday, December 22, 2005 6:00 PM
COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS: In Blue Text.
All spelling suggestions are based on a U.S. English dictionary.


I drink the wine of love
Filled in your eyes,
I dont/don’t Know/know what intoxication
In them Lies/lies;

I know I am drowning in your love
But myself I do not wish to save,
'Cause this feeling of love that I behold
Is more alluring than Life itself.

The world now seems to me
To be such a tiny place,
'Cause I deem the Alpha and Omega
All lie in your embrace!! ~This is my favorite stanza!

Cuddled up by your side
At the fall of the Quaint night
A mystical aura seems to surround us
Elevating me to the beatific realms of your love. ~Maybe you could have added commas and periods to this stanza so that it would read as you intend it too.

The mellifluous sound of your heartbeats
Embodies silent words that stir my heartbeats
Here in your arms I'll live an eternity
Not offended by breaths that slowly cease../cease...

I've been granted the latitude
Of loving you as per my wish
No chords to hold me back
No cravings for ephemeral bliss!!

Your tears caress my bleeding soul
To me, my death they seem to cajole,
But Dont/don’t worry Sweetheart, I'll never go too far
'Cause my Elysium your arms enfold !!!

~I think this is my most favorite poem of your collection so far. It is stuffed with emotions and it is wonderfully written. I might have added more punctuation throughout it, but it’s just a thought. I will read your last poem now...

                   Wist
 
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