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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1425293-Youve-Been-Clamped
by Inky
Rated: E · Letter/Memo · Comedy · #1425293
Emotional Outburst After Car Clamping
To: Southampton County Council
From: The Clamped One, Harbour Light's Cinema, Ocean Village, Southampton

To Whom It May Concern,

I am writing to you regarding an incident that took place in a car park in Southampton, namely, my car being clamped.

I had spent a leisurely afternoon unwinding after my work Christmas party and decided to round off the evening with a trip to the cinema. I chose the Harbour Light's cinema as it was strongly recommended to me by a friend and I heard it was quieter there than the other complexes. I went to see Garden State - I strongly recommend it - it's a very uplifting romantic comedy. I walked out from the film with a spring in my step and bounded over to my car - it was a nippy evening so I half ran to keep myself from perishing. As I neared my car I took a second glance and the sight of a yellow metal jacket over my right front wheel made me take a third look in disbelief.

That was the beginning of the end of a beautiful evening - there was me, my disabled car and an impersonal 0800 number plastered across my windscreen.

What had I done to deserve this I asked myself and then my friend who was equally astonished. I mean there we were in a dark lonely carpark on a Sunday night minding our own business and wanting for nothing except to get home out of the cold when I was suddenly made to feel like a criminal.

I quickly scanned the area for a parking restriction sign but there was nothing in view. Any cinema car park I've ever been to has been public so it hadn't even crossed my mind. On closer inspection, I did see a pay-and-display machine, which was in a very conspicuous place and then I saw what to all intents and purposes looked like a water hazard sign - it had large letters saying "WARNING" and was positioned on a gate leading down to the water. As my eyes roved further down having nothing better to do in the long minutes I was waiting for one of your personnel I read the small print - the words swam before me - unfortunately they didn't swim right into the water and drown but seemed instead to grow in size and come to life, dancing now before me, singing "75 pounds" "SEVENTY FIVE POUNDS" - that's what you get when you park on this PRIVATE ground.

My head still swirling I spotted a little man in yellow overalls responsible for my doom and I was reminded of a book I read recently where a little boy abhorred the colour yellow. Just then for one moment in time, I shared his view. I have to say your member of staff was very pleasant and I had to admire him for the way he totally passed the buck, or should I say 75 big bucks, to the invisible car-park owner, whom he informed me had complete responsibility for the molestation of my front wheel and the dim lighting and lack of any obvious indication that this car park was anything other than a Harbour Light's cinema carpark. He listened to our pleas with shrugged shoulders and rolling head movements, then like a well-rehearsed receptionist rattled off the directions to the hole in the wall.

I walked there (did I mention I had my Christmas party the night before) and created a massive hole in my already holey bank account - maybe I should get it blessed to make it a Happy Holy Bank Account that becomes sacred and protected from the invisible Harbour carpark owners. I handed over my hard-earned cash and couldn't help but feel cheated, conned and man-handled just like my poor car. I noticed the same evening another girl got her car clamped. We are tax-paying citizens who support ourselves and pay our bills and let me point out that they amount to quite a sum what with the rising price of oil and what not - even more at this time of year!

I would ask you to review your policies for this carpark and have some consideration for the hardworking citizens of Southampton. It was a simple oversight that led me to park in the place in question and I do not believe I should be victimised for it, or anyone else for that matter. I would urge you to ensure your car park is well lit and that more clear signs are placed at the entrance so that other innocent residents do not get "taken for a ride" (no pun intended). I think the least you can do is refund the money I paid on Sunday. If not, I am considering writing to the papers, or perhaps doing a slot on Meridian TV. I look forward to your speedy response (again, no pun intended) and extend to you a very Happy Christmas, which is after all the Season of Goodwill.

Yours Sincerely,
The Clamped One















© Copyright 2008 Inky (waterfall at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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