Rated: E · Essay · Relationship · #1575323
The age old question and my honest answer
|Have you ever fallen in love?|
It's a simple question that gets asked by many people many times a day. But let's look at it again. In truth it's not a simple question. It requires the person being asked to open their heart and take the chance of being hurt. Sometimes it is meant just as a conversation piece, but other times it is meant to learn something about you and this type of information can be used to hurt you.
Well, I will answer this question without hesitation and while I can't say that I won't be hurt I will face it.
I fell in love many years ago. I was happy, truly and deeply happy. Before I met her on that step I was a miserable excuse for a human being and I didn't care. I went about my days working and acting like nothing was wrong. I had my routine and Heaven forbid if you should disrupt it. I would get up in the morning, go to the same diner for breakfast, go to work and after start drinking. That was my day.
Then she smiled.
You may say it can't be that simple, but the truth of the matter is that it was. I was a miserable drunk. Then she smiled and I saw what I was missing in my life.
I say she smiled, but you would have had to be there and see it. You may walk along the street or in the mall and see women smile everyday, but I swear it could never equal this one. It was monumental, sweet, shy.
And it worked wonders. I quit drinking. That night after work instead of opening a beer I went back to the diner, walked the same route, but she was gone. I knew the owners of most of the places but no one could give me her name.
That's right, I see this girl one time, she smiles once and I quit drinking. And I didn't even know her name.
So the next morning I repeat my performance. I got up, showered, shaved and went to the diner. There she was, sitting on the step again. She looked up and rewarded me with that smile. My pulse raced, my breath quickened and I walked toward her, smiled back and passed her, going into the diner. After eating she was gone again.
I was saddened and knew it was my fault. I should have opened my mouth, but I couldn't catch my breath. I had never believed in love at first sight before. And it was at this moment I realized that was how I felt. I was in love with this girl.
I went to work. Again after work I returned to the diner asking my questions. But no one knew her.
The following morning I promised myself I would speak to her. On my way to the diner there she was. Suddenly I couldn't breath again. Then that smile, that wonderful smile only God could have given her. And I passed her again without a word.
But today was different. Today my waitress told me where my angel went. Just two doors away was a cosmotology school, and she was enrolled. I still didn't have her name but now I knew why she disappeared.
I don't know how long this went on. But one day I kept my promise.
I saw her that morning, my breath quickened, my pulse raced. She smiled, I smiled. Then I spoke. I swear my heart missed several beats. I invited her to have coffee with me.
She said no.
My heart stopped.
Then added she didn't drink coffee.
I started breathing again.
I invited her for tea or hot chocolate. Anything to spend more time with her.
She smiled and said yes.
And my pulse returned.
This was the beginning. We spent every free moment together, stole a few moments even. But that is for the next entry...