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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1595859-Candy-Is-Dandy
Rated: E · Short Story · Comedy · #1595859
Well as one can see I am stuck on Candy
It had been a long Month and it was time to let loose and have some fun. It was just after PAYDAY; I was tired of being MR.GOODBAR. It was time to let my hair down. I went to see Miss HERSHEY; I found her standing behind the POWERHOUSE on the corner of CLARKE and FIFTH AVENUE.
         Checking her out I pulled out my WHOPPER and whispered in her ear, “Hey SWEETART, how would you like to LOOK at my BIG HUNK for a HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLAR BAR?”
         Well, she immediately went down on my TOOTSIE ROLL, and, UNO it was a pure ALMOND JOY. I could not help but to grab her delicious MOUNDS cause it was easy to see this little TWIX had the RED HOTS. It was all I could do to hold back a SNICKER and KRACKLE as my BUTTERFINGER slipped up her tight KIT KAT and she started to scream; “OH HENRY, Oh Henry!” As she did this I began seeing DOTS.
         Soon she was busy fondling my PIXY STIX and immediately my ZAGNUTS began to tighten. I was hoping to not POP ROCKS but before long I blew my MILK DUDS clear into MARS thus giving her a good taste of the MILKY WAY. I was like a JOLLY RANCHER with a CUP O GOLD.
         She asked if I happened to be into M&M? I was not familiar with this and I said, “Hey CHICKLET, no kinky stuff”. She then asked with some indignity in her voice. “Look, you little GOOBER! Don’t go and be a ZERO, be a LIFESAVER. Why don’t you just take your WHATCHAMACALLIT and slip it up my BIT O’ HONEY?” (And oh, boy, what a piece of JUICYFRUIT she was too.)
         She soon screamed, “Oh, CRACKERJACK, that is perfect. I want to just to let you know you are better than the THREE MUSKETEERS! “ I continued to ram my DING DONG up her ROCKY ROAD and deep into her BUTTER CUP.
         Well, I was givin’ it to her GOOD ‘n’ PLENTY when all of a sudden my STARBURST. As my luck would have it she started to grow a bit CHUNKY and began complaining of a WRIGELY feeling in her stomach.
         Sure enough, nine months later out popped BABY RUTH…
Now I am known around SEN SEN and have become her very own SUGAR DADDY.
© Copyright 2009 winddancer (winddancer0315 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1595859-Candy-Is-Dandy