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by Man S
Rated: · Short Story · Other · #1616563
Love is painful. It's painful dominance lingers.
When Love strikes

By Man. S

Sitting in front of the computer chatting to my net friend grew monotonous as it always did as I inched on to the next level of chat with either side running short of expressions and words. I had taken to internet chatting after I fell prey to unrequited love with Liz. The coldness of affair had shattered me and before I realized it was too late to recover I decided to do something about my broken existence. I knew it was eating into me like anything. I had stopped believing in love after my first affair resulted into bitterness and finally gave way to separation. A period of six years saw my marriage fading into estranged relationship and finally a failure. The interval blew my emotional strength out of proportion. Love sucked and stank for me. However, I continued to be susceptible to any chance to pick up another deal in amorous affair.

Then Liz happened.

I was working as a CIE head in Shepherd International School. The job brought me opportunity to travel abroad with seminars in queue and it happened one after another keeping my schedule tight. Liz joined the school as PRO. My introduction with her very first day was something remarkable. I wondered if I felt a change in me. There was nothing I could explain the way I felt. I let it pass as any other phenomenon that was thrown my way off and on.

Liz seemed happy ever. She charmed everyone who came in her contact. Her bewitching smile, soft and delicate gestures of conversation endeared her to most of the staff. Her black brown eyes were immense depth of an ocean with unfathomable feelings. She made her presence felt everywhere. She moved with a sway of delicacy and spoke with sweetness of smell that is rare.

First she struck me with her womanhood and later my friend got knocked off. But we two  differed in approach. I would rather say he took the bull from side and I did it from horn.

Adrian said one day, “Well, man, you’ve been off the hook lately. Everything is all right?’ I nodded. My reticence had become obvious.

“Max, don’t you think you have…….”, ventured Adrian but my stare stopped him. He understood I had another spell of those monstrous attack of depression.

He observed me for a while and stepped out of my room. Surrounded with my own thoughts and darkness, I lay for a while. I remembered how Liz had mesmerized me with her deep eyes, flaring up the dormant but intense spark of love that I had never allowed to surface up in my life. In the beginning, I shrugged off the way I felt, but it grew stronger and sooner than one would expect, I was already caught in a web of dilemma and disturbance.

Yes, I had fallen in love with Liz unknowingly. A thing, Max, had avowed to discard away and call it the worst thing that he wanted to talk about. Never had I thought pain and torture is my destiny. One can not fight against destiny.


We, always gathered at meals time. I, Adrian and Liz. We were perfect trio of unbalanced ingredients. I was obsessed with intellect, Adrian freaked out at anything sober and stayed simple and Liz never lost sight of frivolity and capriciousness. The chemistry smoked of unrest and unspoken volatility of passion, feeling and emotion. The least valued person, that stood among them was I.

Liz and Adrian made perfect friends. They went, dined, joked and enjoyed together. Liz preferred him to me. But the trio must stand against all the odds. So did I. I created a distance as much as possible knowing that Liz was never comfortable in my company unless it is for Adrian hanging around with us. But somewhere I felt she bore the same spark as I did. It is really difficult to understand the female character. In my case, I had always been a moron, a silly character who always stuck to honesty and sincerity. A gullible, worth winning hands down. And the world remained cruel, ready to pounce upon its victim, if it gives pleasure out of someone’s pain.

One day, Liz came to me in the morning. I had learnt from my experience, that she never approached me except it had something to do with official nature of the work. She asked for a little break, as she wanted to visit the nearby super market for shopping with Adrian. When I answered the doorbell, I understood the purpose as Adrian had already informed me of it the previous night. I wanted to be happy to see her but something inside me tore me up. Adrian had been a foil for me. I thought. But at the same time, he was too innocent to be suspected for. Every time the thought wrought me, I flicked it off with disgust. How mean I can be sometimes. But love is blind. Blame it on love.

I was busy chatting with Gem, a net friend from Uganda, trying to push back the heaviness of my mind and soul, when Liz called up.

“Hi, Max. We are on our way to home. I wonder if you can do us a favour. Keep awake a little more until we reach there by 11.00 pm. We don’t want to disturb your wife.” I forced a smile on my face and promised I would. I always enjoyed doing errands for her.

Later Adrian called up. “ Uh, Max, Liz’s friend insists that we should stay overnight. If you……..” I promptly said, “ Come on Adrian, have your time.” Something ripped off my heart muscles and my voice choked off. I felt like crying. But for my family members, I pulled myself together. But the pain was unbearable. It burnt me until I swallowed three pegs of vodka and lay down on sofa.


Liz’s indifference to my torturous existence made my life a drag and rack of pain. Well, one thing I always did was credited love with great enthusiasm. I described it as unspoken faith and trust. Unspoken, my foot! I never realized it stank like shit.

I finally made a strong decision.

Next day, I found myself standing in front of my chairman, with my resignation in my hand. It backfired. Lately, efficiency of my work had suffered badly. I had resigned myself into my own shell neglecting everything, including my meals and work. The air was full of my inefficiency and the instances of my failure to maintain the dignity of my job. When I handed over my resignation, I felt they had been waiting for it since ages.

I moved to another town.

Another locality.

Another job.

Another life.


It took three years to wipe off the melancholy I bore. I did not hear of my friends. I did not hear of Liz and Adrian. But dreamt of them. Holding hand to hand, walking near sea beach in the sunset. Their silhouette dark and clear. The dream haunted me for couple of week.

I had never stopped cyber friendship. I had made friends, couple of intelligent and nice people, on the net. Nick was the best and I spent most of my time chatting with him. His wit, humour, and sense of common sense was great. I enjoyed chatting with him like an intellect. He was awesome.

He worked with New York Times, as a chief editor. He wrote columns too. I went through every column he wrote. His works eulogized feminism and I firmly believed in feminist cult.

I was sitting with my younger daughter and telling her how a good girl was punished by her goodness, when my phone rang. He told me he had very exciting story to tell me. I switched on my laptop and connected to him. He was online.

“ What’s up, man?” I typed. I loved my space for chatting. It was the fastest and least spammed.

“ I cant dig it, man. She says she is from India, has intellectual capacity, been online with her since last three weeks. I think I am in this time. She is unique.” Flashed the screen with the message.

“ What is her name? place?” , I asked.

“ Eliza, somewhere in Banglore. Her folks settled in late 80’s.”

“ You got it man. Go on.” I typed.

“ Yep, thanx, see ya.”, came the reply.

He logged off.

Then it became a routine. We got online almost everyday. He supplied me with loads of information about his cyber romance. He seemed too deep when he described Eliza. This was, sometimes painful for me. For it flashed my past in my eyes. But I was happy for him. She had fallen for him too. She had hinted at her willingness to go for the nuptial tie. Or rather she was eager too.

One night, I lay in my bed, squirming and tossing as usual, I woke up. Put on my laptop and connected to Nick. He was online.

“ Hey chap, did it ever occur to you that I might wanna see how does your Eliza look like?”

“Oh man, that’s the crape. She refuses to share the pics, you know girlish thing”

“ You may want to be more specific in telling her so.”

“ I , umm, cant say.”

“Oh, come on , Give me a break! It’s not you.”

He felt distressed and answered in affirmative. I knew he would do it.

And he did it too.

I waited eagerly as screen of my laptop flashed. It took rather long time.

“Damn the speed!” I cursed.

I felt thirsty. I grabbed the water bottle from my refrigerator. While I was busy with gulps of water down my throat, my laptop was busy downloading the Eliza’s photo.

I finished my water. My computer finished its job.

I felt hot flush running down my skin. Dizziness swept me over. I felt a whirl of wind rushing past me. I stood dead in the middle of my room.

The screen displayed the photo of MY LIZ. In the message box flashed the words,                    “ What do you say? Isn’t she unique?”

I knew it will be another panic attack and a long distressful life ahead.

© Copyright 2009 Man S (manoaxl at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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