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Rated: E · Other · Other · #1881432
I have suffered from anxiety for years, this is my story of how I felt in the beginning.
It seems so long ago, its funny how time appears to follow no law, or abide by any sense of direction. I remember waking at a very early hour, my head was spinning, my pulse racing, my immediate reaction was, "I am going to die". I still to this day remember that pain... that fear, anxiety has cold hands that can burn the strongest of wills. A sense of dread, and fear of the unknown filled the spots of my head left open from a life of naivety. I felt as if the foundations of my being, which had once seemed so resolute and strong, had crumbled in a matter of seconds.
As the days passed I had withdrawn from the rest of the world, a place now so weird and bizarre. Anger had replaced happiness, I was in a constant sate of fear and the strength of this whirl pool was drawing me under. "How could this have happened?", I asked my self daily, "why me?". Those long cold days turned into even longer and lonelier weeks. The person I had once been, was now dead. I had watched my self die, there was no eulogy, no final epitaph to place on my imaginary self.
After a while you begin to ask yourself, "did that person, truly exist?" Eventually you learn anxiety has been with you all along. A dark shadow, a spectre always a step ahead of you. Anxiety has always had you beat, the questions have no answers and they never did.
© Copyright 2012 CodyConroy (cconroy11 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1881432-Anxiety