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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1998667-Panda-Girl-Part-I
Rated: 18+ · Essay · Emotional · #1998667
A night in Zagreb with the girl of my dreams
Panda Girl
"You are the first man i've seen with a black.. how do you call this?" She said in her soothing slightly eastern european accent and pointed at my black tank top, grabbing it with her petite fingers. "Tank top.." I said smiling, kissing her soft firm lips. We wanted the same things. We wanted eachother. We both needed alcohol to have eachother. I needed it so I could say things I would never have the balls to say. She needed it so she could sleep with me. We all have issues. Those who don't, find something without meaning and sense to complain or obsess about.
She was wearing black stockings, black boxer string, white greyish bra and a sexy short flower dress. She wore a black jacket with a big red button on it. She kept unbuttoning and buttoning it. Her dress was quite showing. Both titts and ass. She was late for our appointment but said I would forgive her because she was really pretty. I said it depended on how pretty. I forgave her. She had pale skin and dark red coloured hair. She teased me by her nature.
We had had sex which had been great except for the fact that I didn't come. But feeling her nails scratching on my back made it amazing.
On the way to my apartment she said she wanted another drink. She was a bit drunk as was I. I had a bottle of whiskey. I made her a drink and we drank. She liked my room and I hated it. We drank some more and I undressed her. I was kissing her neck, feeling her up. She was taking her time with the dress.
She had already expressed her doubts about us. I didn't care. I wanted her and I knew she wanted me. On her wrist she had "Makthub" tattooed in Arabic. I remember seeing her genuine interest in me for the first time when I said: "It is written" after she had said what her tattoo meant in Arabic. That was on our first date that she didn't want to be a date because dates scare her.
Her dress wasn't coming off. I had shut off the lights so I couldn't see so well. She was trying to unzip it but it was stuck. She said that it was a sign that we shouldn't sleep together. She said she believed in signs. I grabbed it and unzipped it. It didn't become fully unzipped but it was enough for her to get the dress off. While she had been fumbling with her dress I had undone her bra. When I had finally gotten her dress off, the bra was redone.
I sat at my desk, she stood in front of me and sat down on me. She kissed so good. Just enough moist and tongue for it to be sexy and passionate. And enough small kisses for it to be romantic. I hate people who cant kiss. Its unbearable. I enjoy the dentist more. Atleast he knows how much he is fucking annoying me.
I lifted her up and half-throwing sat her down on my bed. I laid down on top of her and we kissed. We changed position and I got to feel her moistness. I loved the way we had sex. There wasn't much sound. But the tension and feeling I got in my body was amazing. She had earlier told me that we weren't going to have sex. I said fine, that wasn't what I wanted anyway. I wanted her. Because of the fact that she had seemed so impossible to me. She was prettier, older, had her issues in the way. I had even become pissed off at her for seeming like she ignored me. In the start, I hated the fact that she never hugged and kissed me when we said hi which is customary in Croatia. But that night, it was perfect. She changed her mind about sex after being on top of me for about 2-3 minutes. We were gonna have sex.
She had to go to the bathroom beforehand. I was wearing long green geeky looking underpants under my khakis. I quickly got undressed down to my boxers and I waited for her. I ran over to my cubbard and finished my drink, gagging the last part. She came in silently, and I undid her bra again, swiftly and easy, with two hands though.
Not a master, just a nice guy. That had been her problem with me. She said I was too nice. I asked her: "What? You want me to be an asshole?" She looked straight ahead as if ignoring me and answered as cold as the Croatian winter: "Yes, I'd rather have that". I was pissed off at her for saying that until I realized that it actually meant that she liked me and wanted me. That helped me get her. I told her exactly that. She looked down, embarrassed that I had read her without her intention of letting me know how she felt. She looked up as with a new plan. She said I only wanted her sexually. I told her that that was bullshit. She was sexy, looking at me, trying to look like she didn't expect me to make it. Then seeing her face when I spoke to her heart. I told her that I could say whatever I felt like with her and I did. And she understood. I told her that her issues didn't make her unattractive in my eyes. It made her more real. She had things to say and reasons for saying it. Real reasons. I told her she was real, and that I had chosen her over the others. I don't remember it all. But she smiled the most genuine smile I have ever seen and I made my move. Our kiss was romantic and passionate from the start. I got carried away at the bar, I started to kiss her neck and further down. She laughed and whispered: "Come on, you cant do that here". I didn't wait long before I asked her to come to my apartment. I could see she wanted to. She might not have wanted the sex right there and then but she wanted to be with me. See what more there was to me. And I her. She told me no sex. And she repeated it. I always answered okay. We were gonna have sex.
The boards holding my maddress up in my bed were terrible and it didn't take more than 5 minutes before the maddress was on the floor within the cage of the bed. We laughed. It was then she started to hate my room like I did.
The condom I was wearing disappeared. I still don't know where it is. She was suddenly shocked, panicking as if suddenly waking up from a rush. But she remembered I hadn't come. She lay on top of me afterwards. Her moistness dried up and we stopped. A fear grew inside me. She had neglected me again. The bed was too small. Im not good at cuddle-sleeping. I was horny. I didn't want it to stop. She like all the women I have slept with, fell asleep right away. She had told me that she could only sleep with guys when she was drunk. She would constantly change her opinion about guys. Wanting him one day and hating him the next. I had felt that the third time we had met. She had previously said on the date that wasn't a date, that she hadn't felt awkward as she always does around guys.
She said we would continue when we woke up. I said she didn't do anything when she was sober. She said she would make an exception. I think I woke up her 5 times trying to get sex again. I become pathetic when I get what I want. Drugs, women and well that's it. I become like a junkie. But I was hard, couldn't sleep cuddling. 3 hours of staring at her or up in the air, going to the bathroom, getting some food, doing whatever I could to pass the time, trying to get a kiss, trying to start something, trying not to start something. I remember having a tiny fear of her leaving while I was sleeping. My silent paranoia slowly eating me up. She was just waiting for me to go to sleep so she could get out of here. Finally she kissed me and I slept and I woke up rested and well.
She was still there when I woke up. The sun had come up. I looked at the time feeling like I had slept for 6 hours. I had slept 1 and a half hour. Slowly she became more awake too. I thought she was going to be angry with me. That she wasn't going to kiss me. That she would just storm out the first chance she got. She kissed, she looked, even more loving and romantic than the night before with all the alcohol. She was naked. She had the body of goddess of nature. So natural, with some imperfections to make it perfect.
She left at 12 exactly. I had gotten her to stay some more. We kissed, I gave her a massage and she purred like a cat. With the sun coming through the drapes of my windows. The light touching her back as my left hand supported me body and my right hand massaged her back. My hand sometimes drifted off to forbidden areas. She stopped me. I tried to tease her. I think it worked. This morning was more than lust. I truly believe we fit together. She stayed, she smiled, she kissed, all with such romance and happiness that I hadn't seen in her before.
Either I have terrible one night stands or this wasn't a one night stand. All I am left with her smell in my room, my bed, in my clothes. That godly smell and a bigger longing for being more with her. She told me today when she had gotten home, that she officially didn't think I was a "nice guy" anymore. I asked her why, she said everything. I hinted that it was a good thing, she said she didn't know.

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