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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2059022-Only-These-Walls-Hold-Me-Here
Rated: E · Poetry · Adult · #2059022
A twisted poem about my life, my OCD, and my deepest fears of the world outside.

-Only These Walls Hold Me Here-
by Keaton Foster

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This prison
Six by ten
The ceiling
Just above
The floor
Always below
The door locked
As they convey
My own safety
Is paramount
I can come
And I can go
Always
As I please
At least
That is what
I now believe
In this place
Within my case
Reality
Is not so real
Everything
Plan faked
An illusion
Of an illusion
Cleverly done
Upon my behalf
I’m convinced
There is no truth
There are no lies
Just in between
Riding the seam
Both sides is death
Down the middle
Exactly the same
Copies of copies
The apple never falls far
From a poisoned tree
I’m doomed
Minutia clutters
My empty skull
And saturates
My burdened soul
God knows
My deepest woes
Only these walls
Hold me here
I am free to leave
But I cannot go
Just anywhere
I have to have
A finite destination
A meaningful purpose
Life is nothing
Without both
At least that’s
What they say
Confess it really
I am no deity
But they treat me
As if I am a living
Breathing
Hypocrisy
They judge me
More than they
Judge themselves
They hold me higher
Because they know
The fall is greater
They are sure I deserve
What it is they impose
But as I often say
I don’t
Only these walls
Hold me here
I could leave
I’m free to escape
Walk right out
Into the world beyond
Into that sea of humanity
That I’ve done all that I can
To completely avoid
I’m not sick
I’m just not well
My mind
Betrays my heart
My heart
Betrays my emotions
I am unable to feel
Because I am numb
Broken from day one
Ripped from the womb
Of a mother
That I don’t know
Brought to this place
Held with regard
Kept safe from myself
Via the guise of all else
I cannot escape
Because there is nothing
Keeping me here
Nothing but me
And what I know
I won’t allow myself
The luxury of seeing
What is out there
In that big world
That I’ve done all
That I can to avoid
This place
And these walls
Were built
By these hands
The same ones
That have created
And destroyed much
Of what I should have
Allowed myself to love
Only these walls
Hold me here…


Only These Walls Hold Me Here
Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2015.

© Copyright 2015 Keaton Foster: Know My Hell! (keatonfoster at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Writing.Com, its affiliates and syndicates have been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2059022-Only-These-Walls-Hold-Me-Here