Difficult to be helpless
|We act out our lives daily. The idea of doing nothing is alien to most people. I often exaggerate and tell my husband or sons " I didn't do anything today." But I did. I fed the cats and took a shower; I retrieved the mail and read the paper. I did nothing much, but did accomplish something. We are doers. We want to have something to offer, something to act upon, some effort to make. We want to achieve, accomplish, perform, and do. We look for the word or the action to lubricate the machinery of our lives.
Sometimes we can't do anything. An intractable illness, a financial disaster, or an addiction, those things we cannot change or fix enter our lives and head straight to our emotions. Helpless, hopeless, sleepless, we agonize about what to do. We look for the solution; there has to be a solution, there's always a solution. It's like running laps; you can keep on running, but after a while you come back to where you began. Even then, there's hope that something will occur to you, that inspiration will strike, that a reset button exists somewhere, if only you can find it. So you keep running and running and going nowhere. Eventually, you run out of drive to keep going. It's then that you stop and say " I'm not going anywhere."
What do you do then? Do you despair, or quit, or break down emotionally? The answer doesn't rest in your emotions. The answer rests solely in your will. Your will to accept you can't solve this problem. Your will to stop attempting to fix the situation. Your will to admit you're helpless here and now, and that your actions aren't producing anything other than frustration and pain.
Admit that out loud. Hear your voice as you state your helpless state, your emotional wounds, your need for something you wouldn't acknowledge before. Your father, Abba, hears your voice, and reaches down to you. Naked and vulnerable emotionally, God cradles you protectively and provides for you the peace and assurance you need. You learn to give up, to give up your plan to His and accept whatever comes next. You become still and your heart finds ease as you drop the problems at His feet, trusting He has the answer. Once you choose that, you realize the solution was there all along. It just wasn't your actions that brought it about. Let go and let God enter your life and your spirit. That is always the solution, every time.