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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2169604-Goblin-Problems
Rated: XGC · Fiction · Fantasy · #2169604
A female warrior discovers why you should never underestimate a goblin.
The chittering of insects echoed through the treetops as the midsummer sun shone down upon the world, the long branches of the forest casting cooling shadows across the ground. The slow, rhythmic 'clip-clop' of hooves impacting the hard dirt rang out as a large thoroughbred horse stomped along the path, its pitch black coat contrasted by its snow white mane. And astride this horse rode an absolute beauty: her skin was a beautiful bronzed caramel, shown to all the world by her rather revealing outfit. Her burgeoning breasts were barely contained by her bikini-esk top, black in color with gold highlights, while her luscious derriere was only passingly covered by a same-colored loincloth. Long gloves ran down from her upper arms, ending at her hands where they covered only her middle fingers, while her legs were wrapped in long thigh-high boots. Her ears, long and pointed, poked out from her silver hair, done up in a pony tail, while her golden eyes glanced around lazily.

Eliza Eucliwood growled lightly as she rode her horse through the forest. A mercenary by trade, she made her living off of doing the dirty deeds nobody else wanted to. Of course, usually this meant murder or otherwise fighting, but today's job was... different. It seemed a swarm of goblins had overtaken one of the villages, and the former mayor had asked her to help clear them out. She hated dealing with goblins; the nasty bastards didn't even have the decency to die properly, always spraying their blood or other juices on whatever they could get their grimy hands on as they expired. But as much as she would've liked to ignore the request, she'd been having trouble finding work recently, and the mayor had offered a substantial sum as reward. So here she was, wandering through the forest on a mission to wipe out an entire swarm of the things she hated most.

The trees began to part as the entrance to the town made itself known, a large wooden gateway with a sign hanging above it: 'Norvolk'. Tellingly, the gates were wide open; it seemed the townspeople had left in a hurry, leaving their homes free to any looters brave enough to challenge a goblin hoard. Eliza pulled her steed up to the gate and dismounted, tying the reigns to a nearby post before running her hands along the horse's head. "Don't worry, girl, I'll be right back." Nodding to herself, she turned and entered the abandoned township, holding her hand out to her side and summoning forth her staff as she did so.

Everything was quiet as she walked along the main road. Most of the buildings had their doors half-open, some with windows broken, and all around there were various bits and bobs scattered on the ground; sacks of flour, crates of produce, and more. It was as if everyone in the town had just dropped everything and ran- which, to be fair, they likely did. Goblin hordes weren't something just anyone could deal with, after all. If they didn't have a proper town guard (which it was rapidly becoming clear they didn't), running was their only chance of survival. 'Which means I get to deal with the full strength of the horde. Lucky me...'

Eliza suddenly froze, her ears twitching as she heard something clatter behind her. Turning around, she saw the door to the inn waving around, a small bucket rolling out from it. "Well... Good a place to start as any..." Entering a defensive stance, Eliza began to approach the inn, a small orb of light appearing at the tip of her staff. Pushing the door open, she peered into the building's darkened depths. Any sort of lighting within was long snuffed out, and what natural light filtered in from the windows only stretched a scant few feet into its interior. With a huff, Eliza raised her staff up, the orb at its tip growing larger and brighter to illuminate the inn. And just in time, too, it seemed, as she just barely caught the end of a small, green limb disappearing up the stairs at the opposite end.

She should've just torched the place then and there. She knew there was at least one goblin here, burning the inn to the ground would insure it and any others hiding around would be reduced to ash. But her job was to 'save the town', technically, and she figured burning half the buildings down wouldn't really count for it. So instead she entered the darkened inn, closing the door behind her, her staff lighting her way and allowing her to avoid stepping on any of the numerous tankards spilled onto the ground. Reaching the stairs, she glanced up them, perhaps hoping her target would be right there waiting for her, but found nothing. Sighing, she began to trek up to the inn's second floor, the stairs groaning under her weight all the while.

As she stepped into the new area, Eliza heard the sound of small feet pattering across the wooden floor. It was here, alright. Gripping her staff tight, she began looking around the upper floor. Most of it was just a long strip of hallway, dotted with doors presumably leading to the rooms you could rent for a night or two. If the goblin was out here, there wouldn't be much place for it to hide, but if it was in one of the rooms... Well, it made her job harder, but not impossible. Her boots clacked against the hardwood as she inspected the area, eyes and ears peeled for even the slightest hint of her quarry. Eventually, she found what she was looking for: a door that stood slightly ajar. 'Gotcha.'

Creeping up to the door, she concentrated on the ball of light at the tip of her staff. It seemed to shimmer before condensing down, adopting a bright orange color as it was transformed into a ball of pure fire. Ready, she jumped forward and flung the door open, stabbing her staff into the room and launching the fire ball. A high-pitched scream rang out as the room erupted into flames. It would seem she was right; the goblin had entered this room. But she wasn't victorious yet. Silhouetted by the roaring fire now consuming the room, the goblin suddenly emerged, still screaming as it reared back and seemed to throw something at Eliza. The dark elf didn't even have time to raise her hands to protect herself before it impacted against her head, shattering instantly and sending some sort of liquid raining down her body. Stunned by the impact, Eliza leaned against the doorway, allowing the goblin to easily scamper past her luscious legs and down the staircase once more.

Eliza swore to herself as she raised her staff and pointed it at the fire, the roaring flames almost immediately quieting to a low smolder as she reached up and grabbed the side of her head. She wasn't too worried about the contents of the bottle; goblins were scavengers, using anything and everything they could get ahold of. It had probably just a bottle of alcohol. That would certainly explain how warm it was making her feel. But that didn't much help with the headache it had given her or how dizzy it had made her. Unfortunately, she hadn't elected to learn any healing spells in her life, so all she could do was wait until the world stopped spinning.

Taking a deep breath, Eliza left the room and headed downstairs once again. She groaned as she trudged down the steps; she hated dealing with goblins, and this shit was exactly why! With manticores or bugbears, everything was nice and straight forward. You enter the cave, you wake them up, you kill them. Straight and simple. Not with fucking goblins though! They always had to make even the easiest jobs feel like hell! She had just started and she was already feeling exhausted, her body feeling sluggish as she looked around the bottom floor, her staff once more lighting up the area. The door was still closed, so it was unlikely the little shit had left. So where...

Idly, she wandered behind the bar and found her answer, spying an open cellar door in the floor. With a grin, she bent down and began to lower herself through it, ignoring how tense her body was feeling from it. After this, she was leaving this shit town and finding someplace to relax. She could always come back another day and finish the job, assuming someone else didn't beat her to it. With a huff, she stepped onto the cold stone floor and looked around. Barrels of liquor and racks of wine dotted the area, and there, standing at the far edge of the room...

Its skin was a sickly green and seemed stretched far too tight across its form. Its limbs were thin and spindly, ending with gnarled, twisted claws, and contrasted sharply with its round belly. Its eyes glowed a wicked yellow while its crooked mouth hung open slightly, giving Eliza a good look at its broken fangs. But the worst part of it all was that the beast was completely and totally naked, allowing Eliza to see quite clearly that the small member between its legs was fully erect.

It was disgusting just to look at, but she wouldn't be looking at it for much longer. Grinning wickedly, she stepped toward the beast, delighting in how it pushed itself against the wall, as if trying to escape through it. Her hand gripped her staff tight as she raised it up. "You're done for!" Pointing it at the goblin, she let loose a bright torrent of flames, the monster's screams echoing through the underground cellar as it was reduced to naught but a pile of ash!

...Or at least, that's what should've happened. But in reality, when Eliza moved to lift her staff, she found that she couldn't. Her arm wouldn't respond to her commands. Neither would her mouth for that matter, nor would her neck or her legs. She was paralyzed completely and totally, only able to breathe, her mouth hanging open from her attempts to speak. What was going on? How could this happen?! Wait a minute.... Her mind flashed back to the bottle the goblin had thrown at her. Could it be that it had gotten lucky and found a paralyzing potion to use on her?! Judging by her near-total immobility, that seemed to be the only answer...

The goblin watched as its would-be hunter froze in place before a twisted grin spread across its face. It dashed forward, it's pudgy belly jiggling wildly as it approached Eliza's frozen legs. Reaching out, it grabbed ahold of the caramel flesh, gripping it tightly before pulling. It began to climb up her body, Eliza forced to simply standby as it used her gorgeous curves as handholds and steps, eventually managing to pull itself up to her face, its clawed feet digging into her chest. The monster looked her straight in the eyes before it began to pry her frozen mouth open. If she could, she would've screamed as her luscious lips were pulled apart, her mouth wide open. The goblin couldn't ask for a more inviting entrance as it ducked down and began to shove itself inside.

Had her body not been paralyzed, Eliza would've gagged as the monster entered her mouth. Its skin tasted like overly-salted rotten meat, with a texture that was dry yet oddly slick at the same time. She couldn't understand what it was doing, though. It had obviously seen her chasing it, there was no way it could mistake her for some kind of suit of armor or whatever. Was it just particularly dumb? Or did it have something else in mind? As the beast crawled down her throat, bulging against her soft skin as its feet kicked wildly in the air before slipping into her mouth as well, Eliza was forced to entertain that as a possibility. It had used a paralyzing potion on her, after all, something she'd never seen a goblin do. Whatever it was doing right now, it knew it was doing it!

The bulge traveled down her throat and into her stomach, the goblin's wildly thrashing claws pushing, pressing, and cutting the dark elf's insides, but she was unable to groan in pain. But slowly, she felt something inside her... 'shift', almost painlessly. The same bulge that had gone down to her stomach now seemed to reverse its course and come back up. But the goblin didn't intend to leave through Eliza's mouth. No, as the bulge reached her neck once more, Eliza's eyes widened in fear as she felt something scratching at the back of her skull. Scratching, clawing... trying to get in... Tears began rolling down her eyes as she thought about what would happen next and how dearly she wished she was wrong. 'No, no, no, please, no, by the gods, please don't-'

Crack.

Pain.

Nothingness.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The bulge in Eliza's head slowly shrank down, the dark elf's skull seeming to throb a bit as it did so. Once it was completely gone, all was still. Minutes eventually passed, and the effects of the paralyzing potion began to wear off, Eliza falling to her knees, hunched over on the cellar floor. A gasp wracked her body, her eyes flying around the room wildly before eventually landing on her own form, upon which a wicked grin spread across her pretty face. She reached up and cupped one of her breasts, the orb of fat spilling between her fingers as she moaned sensually. "Mmmm~... So it does work~... And now she's all mine~..."

'Eliza' began to stand, using her staff to help steady herself as she looked around. Pointing her staff at a cluster of barrels in the corner, they suddenly flew to the side, revealing a glowing magic circle underneath them. "I can't believe it... It was a shot in the dark, and yet..." She moaned again, running her tongue along her lips as she straightened up. "Oh, and she tasted so good~. So many memories, so much personality~." Smiling wickedly, she turned and made her way out of the cellar and out of the inn as a whole.

As the dark elf stepped back into town, the nearby bushes suddenly shook wildly as dozens upon dozens of glowing eyes peered out at her from within. With a cocky smirk, she jutted her hip out and placed her hand on it. "Took you guys long enough. You missed all the fun~." There were murmurs, in the goblin language, before another goblin emerged from the bushes, approaching the dark elf warily and speaking in a series of clicks and whoops. Surprisingly, Eliza seemed to understand it perfectly. "Yup, all me. Not a trace of her left~." The new goblin suddenly looked excited as it spoke erratically for a bit before allowing Eliza to respond. "Don't worry, I won't just leave you all here. But I'll have to find someone nice... How about those Valkyries? They've got some real beauties~." The goblin nodded excitedly, and Eliza giggled as she began walking back to the entrance of town, a new sway in her hips. "Then I'll go do that, and you guys go do that~." She chuckled as her entire expression became more sinister. "We'll teach them for treating us like pests..."

She reached the town gate and approached the tied up horse. The beast glared at her, perhaps detecting there was something wrong with its rider, but its worries were quickly dispatched as she ran her hand through its mane. "Come on, girl, let's get going." Untying it, Eliza climbed atop her mount's back and made her leave of the abandoned town, a wicked grin firmly on her face as she thought about how to help her brethren.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2169604-Goblin-Problems