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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2239714-Another-small-encounter
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by Jes
Rated: 13+ · Non-fiction · How-To/Advice · #2239714
For some reason, I don't seem to ever find someone right for me.
Genuinely hate myself. My first time liking someone in months and it ends up badly. Am I just cursed? Do I juat have bad taste? Should I have just put up with it? I feel so dumb for believing him, but I can't get over him. A flag rose in my head when he said "I would never use you for nudes," but I didnt listen to it. I never thought he would anyways, so why should I be concerned about it? I genuinely liked him. I pushed him back BECAUSE I was afraid of liking him. He said he didn't care and would wait for me to like him. I smiled. I smiled way too much. It wasn't long, but he was there everyday. No matter the time, he was one dm away. I'd joke with him, laugh, and even flirt. And now here I am, tears in my eyes over my own decision. I don't want to cry over him since I'm hoping I'll realize he isn't worth it. It's just that he made me smile so much, that I can't forget him. Yesterday, I was with him for hours on call and watching anime. Somehow the convo drifted to him sending a dick pic. And I said he wouldn't since not only was he a great guy, but I truly didn't think he would nor did I want him to send it. So he ends up sending it and says I instigated it by saying questioning his gall to send it. So I didn't do anything about it and said we'll act like nothing happened. He blurred out the background and asked me so many times not to screenshot. That should've been another red flag of him not trusting me. But no, I let it pass once again. After ending that on a positive note, we just went to sleep. Although, the next day, I get a dm from a friend. She tells me that he also sent her a dick pic. Not only that, but also a video of him jerking off. What are you supposed to say to that? It's okay? I understand why you sent it to someone else? No. That's not something I would say. Especially since he had known she was a friend of mine. He had even told her not to tell me so that I would "Feel special." She thought I'd be mad if she told me. Well, of course I was mad. Just not at you or him. I was mad at myself. I was dissapointed. WHY am I so gullible?!?! I really shouldn't have met him. If I hadn't, I wouldn't be feeling as I am now. Why am I so unlucky?
I unadded him on everything without a word.
What would you have done?
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2239714-Another-small-encounter