The ill-fortuned journey of a guy looking for his baseball cap
|Ba'Noogie was a baleful chap,|
angry thru and thru.
He lost his favorite baseball cap
and didn't know what he would do.
He accosted Sammy at the square,
he beat him pretty sound.
But when he looked 'round for his cap
it was nowhere to be found.
Next, he sought out dear old Joe,
found him sitting by the well.
Told him, "Give me back my cap
or I'll send you straight to hell."
But Joe didn't have that cap, you see
so Ba'Noogie left him laying
in a growing pool of his own blood,
just like he was saying.
Then Ba'Noogie tried his luck downtown
at the Five and Dime
but no one there had seen his cap
so, it was on to his next crime.
He set the whole store aflame
with people still inside.
And watched it burn down to the ground.
So many there had died!
The cops, they came and took him in.
They put him in shackles and cuffs,
locked the door behind Ba'Noogie,
this time, they'd had enough.
But Ba'Noogie, he had a one-track mind
and offered them some bread
if only they could find the cap
that was still atop his head.
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