by Dream Froggy
Rated: 18+ · Short Story · Fantasy · #2279441
Uress discovers something strange about his couch.
|Uress woke up with his head feeling like a blocked drain, stuck with lumps of ancient pudding and bits of chicken legs pounding against his skull. |
He shouldn't have done that yesterday.
He groaned and threw off empty beer cans of his body and other stuff he would rather not know or either remember what they were used for. He combed through the crevasse of his weathered leather couch, searching for the joint from last night.
Something was wrong.
He reached deeper, from hand, arm and to shoulder. Arctic winds danced around his hands, he yanked his arm out of the couch and stared at his palms.
Uress ripped off the covers and threw them to the floor. He picked his phone and turned on the flashlight with sweaty hands like butter that stood outside for too long on a hot summer day. He slapped his overgrown face two times and dove in head first straight into the infinite crease of the couch.
Smells of an abandoned house lived in by seniors, burned leather and sweet incense bombarded his nose. He snapped his eyes open, his breath closed instead.
A room that came straight from the 80's, neon lit signs hung on the movie poster covered walls, shelves filled to the brim with- "those are my house keys I lost 2 years ago?!" And other trinkets he thought he was too high to remember where he put them. In the corner was a counter stacked with magazines and pokemon cards. An old man stood behind it, he reminded Uress of a stone beside a road, eroded by eons of water erosion, winds pushing while the earth sunk him deeper down and moss as old as time itself grew beneath.
"Greetings, young fellow." The old man said.
"Would you like to purchase a… mhm wait,"
The man rummaged behind his cluttered corner. "Aha!" He pulled something out.
"Here it is, a rolled paper tube!"
Uress stared at him. "Thats the joint I've lost, "
"Well, finders are keepers. Those are the rules of our realm," The old man raised his arms. Uress rubbed the bridge of his nose. This guy…
"Aight, I'll play by your rules. How much?"
"Trade with something of equal value."
Uress took from his back pocket a pack of cigarettes and threw one at the old man, who caught it with the reflexes of an expert rugby player. He walked away from his counter towards the upside down hanging Uress and handed the joint.
Uress lit it up and took a puff.
"Thank you." Uress exhaled and reached out with the blunt towards the old man, his face turned into a question mark. Uress waved it further. The man hesitated, but eventually took it and inhaled. His eyes widened like he just won a jackpot.
"It has quite the exquisite taste, where have you acquired this herb, young fellow?"
"I got some growing in my backyard," Uress chuckled.
"Well, strike me in the bowels and call me jitterbugged, if it ain't some luck, " He said, rubbing his beard in thought.
"The fairies have been requesting medicine of this calibre,"
"Ah yes, they are quite… chaotic at times, yet I hold them dearly in my old heart. Nonetheless, I shall offer you an arrangement, trade these herbs for my wares. Shall you accept?" The old man said, reaching his open palm to Uress. He glanced around the store for a moment before he exhaled.
"It's a deal," Uress said, reached down and gave a firm handshake.
"Pleasure making… business with you." The man gave a sly smirk that could even make the devil ashamed.
Word count: 600