Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Comedy · #2287390
Santa's image suffers a drunken blow
| "You were supposed to be a hero. A hero for all us kids! Our parents always told us what a great guy you were." |
"We believed in you, Santa. All those stories, making us believe you were a merry old soul...bringing joy to all the good boys and girls. I'm crushed."
"Well, now we know why he is so very merry, Sis."
"Oh, Geoffrey it is all just so sad."
"How the mighty have fallen! He ain't gonna be standing on no snowy rooftops in his condition."
"He kind of looks like Uncle Tim just before Mom throws him out."
"Yeah, think about all the whispering mom and dad would be doing, if they saw this mess."
"We would be stuck in our room til our vacation is over."
"Trying to figure out why he even needed Rudolph. Santa can light the way with his own red bulb of a nose."
"Mom is going to be so mad about her rosebush. She is going to think we did it."
"Man, this blows! All we got for Christmas is drunken Santa and a broken rose bush."
"I am not picking the thorns out of his butt."
"The toys, how we gonna get the toys? Still stuck on the roof with the reindeer."
"Maybe, we can get them to come down with a cookie. They still fly right?"
"When Santa wakes up he isn't gonna be real happy with us. We know his shame. His jolly comes out of a bottle."
"Dad's kinda like that too on Christmas and he's funny."
"Not thinking this guy is gonna be so merry and bright. Might have to sleep it off til New Years."
"Santa, I still love you, but you have to quit boozing."
"Get your phone, Sis. We need to do need to do some picture taking damage control. We will get those toys."
"You are so smart, Geoffrey. Being good, ain't gonna do it this year."
"One picture of this ugly scene will give us the power for a long time."
"Santa, I so wanted to keep believing in you."
"Don't cry, he did it to himself. Never seen a Santa with blow up reindeer antlers on his head, jingle bells in his beard, and thorns in his backside."
"So sad. This was more fun when we were little."
"What was it big fellow, all that eggnog?"
Word Count: 398