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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2296773-An-introduction
Rated: 13+ · Preface · Community · #2296773
where i try to introduce myself, hence the title...
Greetings Earthlings!

my name is Belshazzar Wastebasket, but you can call me Batmaninwuhan. as the name suggests, I live in the city of Wuhan, in the socialist paradise known as the euphoric people's rupublic of China. i traveled far from my ancient swamp, where i flourished in the radioactive sludge and enjoyed industrial sewage, until i wanted for deeper things. though the move to solid ground entailed much pain, exposure to air being quite damaging to my tentacles, I have found a way to exist among humans and even HAVE A JOB. i teach young humans English and hate every moment of it, but apartments don't build themselves and meatballs don't grow well, when you plant them in the garden. living between existential tentions is not easy, yet I tell myself i'm just following orders...

i have few accomplishments so far, yet i have succeeded, beyond all expectations in the creation of my daughter, Sophia, who luckily does not resemble me in appearance, and is of a far suprior level of intelligence, even at age 4.

i intend to write about her, and of other things, though it would be of poor quality and display gross imbacility.
such is the way of things, that your proboscis extends, and you ready to punch out ideas, yet the idea is not full formed, overly convoluted or just ugly.

i find that writing is a perfect way to channel my emotions and needs, and so write much and regret even more. sadly, i posess very limited computer skills and have difficulty to even avoid tyops. you will see many typos and editing atrocities, i apologize. but i ask you ; who is to blame - the one with the absurdly fat appendages or the one who makes cellphone keyboards so insanly small?

i used to write on another website called www.theprose.com . if you know me from those muddied waters, you have my sincerest apologies, please give me a chance to make it up to you. you deserve better.

likes and dislikes are illusions of the mind, yet i like some things more than others. current pop music SUCKS!!!, yet classical and jazz are the best.
here are a few more..
Fooooood!
movies. but no remakes!!
Star wars!!!
science
science fiction
honesty,
philosophy,
food,
the theater,
ant eaters,
air conditioning,
heavy metals, and their oxidated salts,
high fructose corn syrup,
coffee
the smell of books,


Dislikes: printers, conservative hypocrites, bleeding hearts, star trek, mayonnaise, rod Stewart, Kenny G, club music, sports, driving, drivers, roads, potholes. i also despise my neighbors, billionaires, the Royal family, reality TV, noise, smoking, flying, tidying up, failure, and newts. there is plenty more but its just a first post.

i fear artificial intelligence, global warming, people, food poisoning, and my own stupidty.

I can: play piano, and saxophone, talk endlessly, bore you to death, warm food in a microwave to great precision, abstain from drinking, compose articles, choose colors, identify shapes and animals, tell a hawk from a handsaw, finance a trip to the zoo, order food in several languages in a restaurant, express my loathing to Donald Trump.

i can't: forgive the icebergs, bring myself to buy a cinema ticket to a superhero film, eat in moderation, abstain from chocolate, avoid rubbernecking, stop the tides, have nice-smelling feet, do math, save the Rhinos

in five years, i see myself five years older, while this shall proceed, an insane number of animals will go extinct.

if i could be anyone, i would be someone that can answer this question.

if i had all the money in the world, I'll make a clone of sean Connery and focus on more bond films at least another twelve.

if i could kill baby Hitler, then i would just cut off his tongue, but not as a baby-that's just sick. wait 'till he's grown...

if i could ask Albert Einstein one question, it would be if he could tell me what's it like to be dead.

as the mists clear, and the horizon separates, fluids on the bottom, gas on top, when the sun rises over the flooded world, you must be weary of the undertow and other beasts. it's a pityless world, this vision, full of teeth and claws, yet you can find comfort, if you are lucky, with simple things, like a poem, or a discarded, a past expiration can of spam, love, and a nice plump truck driver, who plummeted with his rig into the waters, there are other joys, that brace and fill one's heart in hope. hope that it's going to be painful for just a bit longer.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2296773-An-introduction