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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books.php/item_id/1437803-Can-we-talk/sort_by/entry_order DESC, entry_creation_time DESC/sort_by_last/entry_order DESC, entry_creation_time DESC/page/9
Rated: 13+ · Book · Cultural · #1437803
I've maxed out. Closed this blog.
This is a way of making myself write something coherent and grammatically correct almost every day. I'm opinionated and need an outlet. I'm also prone to flights of fancy. Thanks for stopping by.
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June 23, 2015 at 11:57pm
June 23, 2015 at 11:57pm
#852312
         Omigosh, the heat! Of course, when it runs too long, our AC freezes up. Every afternoon as it hits the high 90's, it just runs but doesn't cool. We have to turn it off for an hour or so, and let the heat defrost it. Then it works fine the rest of the day. The repairman comes, and he can't fix it either. It's just too small a heat pump for our house. It looks huge as it is, but the house is not that big.

         So when we start baking, our energy goes. Today, we actually lasted until dinner time. So I watched an old movie from 1973, with the ceiling fan going, and a floor fan in the other room. I had to crank the volume to hear over the fans.

         I'm really getting into these old movies more than ever. Richard Benjamin, James Coburn,James Mason starring in The Last of Sheila. I don't remember ever hearing of it before, and I was a big fan of all those stars. There's a young Dyan Cannon and Raquel Welch.I kept staring at Raquel, knowing she was a young version of someone I should recognize. I had to look it up.

         It's an Agatha Christie style whodunit, with lots of bends and turns. And, no I had no idea who did it, until the very end. It's about movie stars, directors, and producers. It makes them all look like a very cold bunch. (No stereotype there.) Your sense of justice is not served in the end. The ending brought to mind Deathtrap, which also starred Dyan Cannon years later. The Last of Sheila is a spell binder!
June 22, 2015 at 11:45pm
June 22, 2015 at 11:45pm
#852235
         My brother and I had a pity party last night. We both wear glasses now. I have bifocals. Because of the frames we chose, we both think we resemble our maternal grandmother. Some people might think that's not a bad thing, but she was no beauty even when she was young.

         From the pictures I've seen of her when we were babies, she had jet black hair which she kept in a long braid, wrapped around her head. She was big boned, but thin as a new grandmother. She probably was a size 18 before she died, but that came from years of retirement, and not walking everywhere all the time once she learned to drive. She never wore make-up or colored her hair. So I remember her as salt and pepper, then solid gray. But she had a great sense of humor and loved to laugh. I admired her for learning to drive after age 55.

         My dad's mother was only 5'2", small boned, and had a size 5 foot. She did wear make-up, accessorized her outfits, and could really dress up when she wanted. She colored her hair that cheap blue shade. She wore glasses, too, but we don't look like her. We thought for a while that we might because my dad, my aunt, and my uncle all wrinkled the same way she did, and had matching jowls, None of us (I have 3 brothers) were short or small boned. In fact my cousins on my dad's side joke with us about the big heads that run in our extended family. It's tough on pregnant women.

         I know I'm making us sound like mutants. But isn't it odd how genes dictate our appearance, and how we evolve through the decades? Out of 4 grandparents, why do we resemble one more than another then at a certain stage resemble another? Why are the dominant genes the ugly ones? Both my grandfathers were sort of nice looking. We could have had some of their traits, but no.

         We can't overcome Mother Nature. I guess we'll just keep our glasses on, not look in the mirror, and hope we end up with some of their observed traits, like generosity, humor, hard work, honesty, nurturing, pride in a job well done. They were, after all, revered by their grandchildren, even if we are starting to look like them in their old age.
June 21, 2015 at 11:43pm
June 21, 2015 at 11:43pm
#852146
         I occasionally experiment in the kitchen. I have discovered there is a reason they don't mix mushrooms and yellow squash. I know from an old cookbook that if you have a recipe requiring buttermilk, and you don't have any, substitute a cup of sweet milk with 1 tablespoon of cider vinegar. (Sweet milk, for you non-cooks, means regular milk, not canned or buttermilk.)

         I have learned that a little tarragon in scrambled eggs is good. Too much tarragon and you've ruined the eggs. Turmeric is used in making prepared mustard, so it has a mild flavor. You can add it to meat, vegetables, salads, etc. And it's supposed to be good for your joints. It does turn dishes a little yellow. Dry mustard can be used in almost anything as well. It comes from the mustard seed, is mild flavored, and turns things a bit yellow. I really like to add it to cheese dishes, especially cheddar. It heightens the flavor.

         Ginger and curry are two I've been trying lately. Curry is good on vegetables and cooked fruit. Ginger doesn't just go in cookies and desserts. It goes on everything. Today, for Father's Day, I broiled steaks with salt, pepper, and ginger. They loved them. (I didn't tell them about the ginger.)I fixed stir fry vegetables with chicken last week, using ginger, lite soy sauce, and sesame seeds.

         I'm tired of buying an expensive spice for one recipe, then letting it sit in the cabinet until it's too old to use and discarding it. I'm going to learn the best use of the most common spices and do it. The family will like it or start taking me out!
June 21, 2015 at 12:04am
June 21, 2015 at 12:04am
#852098
         Not everyone had a great dad or knew who one was, for that matter. But a strong father seems to make a great deal of difference in the family life.Sometimes, it's the step-father, or grandfather, or uncle or some other guardian who takes the place of a father. All children benefit from a father figure, even if he isn't perfect.

         Some studies were done in Africa of elephants. Herds of young males with no older males present went rogue. They fought over the female. They bullied the babies. They rampaged everywhere. Then the game wardens took some older males out of other herds, transported them to the terrorist herds, and an amazing thing happened. The wild herd calmed down. The older males set the example and peace was restored in their natural ranks. No elephants had to be put down or tranquilized. The elephants policed themselves.

         Students of human behavior have compared humans of all races and continents to the elephants. Where the young men are left on their own, they tend to go over the top with their own strength and power. They bully women and children and the elderly. But where there are solid male heads of household, male teachers, and male leaders, these young males become more productive and socially acceptable. There is a very strong case for fathers to take responsibility for their own kids. Boys learn to imitate the men they are around.That includes swearing or holding doors open for women. They see. They imitate.

         To all the fathers out there, Happy Father's Day. Be the kind of man you want your kids, or any kids, to become.
June 19, 2015 at 11:02pm
June 19, 2015 at 11:02pm
#852026
         I have a friend in his 70's who said he comes from a long line of crazy. He started listing briefly the weird uncles and other relatives who starred in the story of his childhood. He turned out okay, so it must not have impeded his development much. The truth is that probably most of us have a little crazy in our backgrounds.

         If you look at your extended family, you could probably come up with a black sheep of some sort. Some families are so full of crazy relatives that they're actually proud of them. They used to go on the Jerry Springer show. Now they go on Doctor Phil. You might have to look at second cousins or your parents' second cousins, but they're out there. People just do a really good job of keeping secrets or covering things up, sometimes.

         My grandmother's family had such an experience. This was before talk shows or reality TV, so they felt ashamed of a situation. My grandmother's cousin started out west with her family in the early 1900's. She got TB and died in Illinois. Her husband turned to alcohol and farmed out the children to various relatives and strangers. The one who went with a stranger went out west, but was a slave to the woman who promised to care for him as a son. She beat him, and refused to let him go to school. So at age 14, he ran away to his mother's sister in Oregon. Later he rejoined his father in Washington State.

         In Washington, the father got into a poker game. When he thought he was being cheated, he shot him. He went to jail for murder. (A cowboy tale almost 20 years after cowboys faded away). He went to jail and died there. I've seen the records.

         Well, my grandmother's family was so ashamed. Too many people knew about it in their area, back East. So they packed up 14 kids and moved 3 hours away at today's speed limit, where no one knew them. They always spoke of it in hushed tones if at all. She was very young when they moved. All her life, she believed the killer was one of her much older brothers, and the runaway was a middle brother who did disappear after age 20. And that's what she told her children. It wasn't until I did the research on the family, proved the records, and found her brothers names in the census, that we learned differently. Grandma will never know the truth. My dad was quite upset, and couldn't believe his mother had not told him the truth. But it shows how badly secrets can turn uglier.

         These days I think people would just try to live it down. It's too easy to track down ugly facts. But I've got an ex-sister-in-law you could write a book about.
June 18, 2015 at 11:31pm
June 18, 2015 at 11:31pm
#851930
         Summer TV stinks doesn't it? You either watch reruns of shows you didn't see the first time around, opt for an old Jeanette McDonald movie, or turn it off and find something else to do. The problem is that most other things involve energy or thinking. The purpose of the boob tube is to vegetate in front of it.

         So I'm left with finishing a boring book, cleaning out the refrigerator, or sorting through more clothes to go to Good Will. My mind obviously isn't engaging. I lost a pair of earplugs today without even using them. I can't seem to compose the business letters that I really need to finish.

         That brings me to energy. My nose is runny and my eyes are dry. I'm sneezing more than usual, so I'm a little low on energy. I pulled a muscle in my leg while mowing grass two days ago, and I swear it's hurting more as the day wears on. My IBS is acting up for two days in a row. So, no, I don't want to do the closets or dresser drawers any more. I don't want (or can't) bend over to clean the bottom of the refrigerator. I know I need exercise and wanted to go to the park. But between the stomach thing and the leg making me hobble in public, I chose to stay close to home.

         Maybe it's just the heat wave here. I hope it's just a temporary thing I'm going through. I have no creativity in me. I'll muddle through. Maybe my mind will come back, even if the body doesn't.
June 17, 2015 at 10:55pm
June 17, 2015 at 10:55pm
#851853
         I was reminded recently of a guy with whom I once worked. He was outspoken and politically incorrect. He would make remarks just to get reactions from people. He and I were such opposites. We joked about writing an advice column together.

         I think it could have worked, but he admitted he wasn't disciplined enough to do it on a regular basis. He would always take the obnoxious, in your face response. It came to him naturally. It amazed me how he could rattle off the worst possible answer so quickly, but it always made us laugh out loud. After he had let someone have it, and given him "what-for", I'd say, "No, don't listen to him." Then I'd have a gentler response.

         I can't come up with an answer every time or immediately. But I do know how to validate a sincere person and show concern for their concerns. I try to practice the Golden Rule and consider all sides. Of course, the listener doesn't always want to hear all sides. Sometimes the best advice is just to guide someone in making a decision, but not express any preference.

         Our co-workers thought the column would be a good idea for us, but we all knew people would tune in for the politically incorrect, outrageous responses. Not everyone can give good advice. Not everybody can appreciate good advice. Just look at any social media. Someone expresses a real problem or concern, but they get other people's rants in return or get chastised for having feelings.

         I could probably make up some Jim-type answers for a column, but I'm just not very good at that sarcastic, mean stuff. I still think we could have been a hit.
June 16, 2015 at 11:31pm
June 16, 2015 at 11:31pm
#851809
         Most of our "downtown" roads have bike lanes added in. That means in some areas, merchants had to give up parking spaces for their customers. But the county roads are another story. Many roads are winding, on hilly terrain, and have overgrown vegetation on the sides. The lack of a decent shoulder makes it difficult for pedestrians, who can jump into the grass or ditch without a wreck.

         These county roads were not designed for bicyclists. The road from my subdivision is a good example. When there is a biker on the road, traffic must slow and follow for miles, because the curves in the road are too frequent to allow visibility of oncoming traffic. No one observes the speed limit which varies from 35 to 55, so a biker could be seriously injured. At the end closest to the main highway, there are turning lanes, a middle lane, and sidewalks around the apartments that allow more room.

         There is currently a petition to ban bike riding from certain busy roads, unless there is a tournament with adequate warning, road blockage, and security monitors. Outrage breaks out over everything, so there is much grumbling about this. Bicyclists claim that if it's public everyone should have free unlimited use of it. Others say only people buying gas pay for the roads.

         I say safety is the most important factor. Why don't bicyclists want to be safe? Build more bike lanes. Use the myriad mountain bike trails around this city. Bike in the rural subdivisions (they are full of hills and curves, but less traffic). If the bike is your primary transportation, then take a bus or drive to the commuter lots and switch to a bike where you will be safer.

         Whatever conclusion we reach, bikers need to be more considerate of drivers. Nobody wants to kill or maim you.

June 15, 2015 at 11:45pm
June 15, 2015 at 11:45pm
#851706
         Well, ten hours of Texas history and a little legend thrown in and I am now a little enlightened. Did we study this in high school, and it just went out of my head? What I like the best was the pictures and a little write up of each character at the end. If they had shown that at the beginning, or presented in some history book, it would have been boring. But having seen the characters in action, the viewer felt some involvement in their outcomes.

         Ray Liotta had the biggest, most obvious character development, as he turned from war crazed single warrior of revenge to a man with a soul. After an epiphany, Bill got a hair cut and was cleaned up physically and spiritually. We finally hear his story and see him become a man of peace. He was pretty gruesome and scary before the first 3 and a half episodes.

         There's not really a happy ending. Life and history go on.But the Texas Rangers ride off to be a part of it, being firmly established by then. I will do some research and further reading. It's a good series. If you haven't seen it, catch it the next time around.
June 14, 2015 at 11:21pm
June 14, 2015 at 11:21pm
#851634
         I really like the music of Eric Church. He's a country singer, song-writer with a definite twang. I didn't know who he was until I went to the Grand Ol' Opry 3 years ago. He was performing. I thought it was bad luck that the only night we could go some unheard of singer would be the big performer of the night. But it turned out he made me a fan.

         He didn't use a band that night. He just played acoustic guitar with a microphone. Of course, he wore his big hat. He's only recently been photographed without it. He looks like the boy next door without it. His mini concert was wonderful. He one song that hadn't been released yet. That country boy voice left a big impression.

         Since then, I've heard him on the radio a lot. I've been impressed with his family themes, traditional values, and the influence of religion he weaves in. Don't get me wrong, he's not a religious singer. He praises "the Hag" (Merle Haggard) and drinking. But when I listen to the words, you get the feeling that he's writing about real life, about working class people.

         This year I bought an album of his for my I-pod. I listen as I go walking. One outstanding song is about being glad he's not what he almost was. It reminds me of Garth Brooks' "Unanswered Prayers". In this song, he tells how life throws curve balls at us and we change our strategies. An injury took him away from a football career and scholarship. Other things took him out of wrong relationships and wrong jobs. Now he's loving his life as a musician.

         Another song I enjoy from that album is "A Long Line of Sinners Like Me". Every verse is so clever. While it's meant to be a little funny, a religious person would have to agree there is some truth to it, even from an evangelical point of view.

         His music is peppy enough to keep my walking at a good speed. His words are profound enough to make me think. He's a poet and a good musician.

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