I did mention before that I am a diabetic, type II. For several years now, and on medication. I also try to do a low-carb diet because it’s healthy, and if conducted properly I lose weight which is good for lowering my blood sugar level. But it’s difficult to stop eating bread, which I love…a cheese sandwich ahhh, or rice, pasta, pizza, the lot. It’s just damned hard. But I know that low-carb is really good for me, so I try to do my best and I do lose some weight. But…is it enough?
The last time I was at my GP’s for a blood test and results etc. I was gaining weight, and my level was high. So, she said then that if things didn’t change for the better I would be a candidate for injecting insulin. Oh horror, that’s the last thing I want. I am scared to death only thinking about injecting insulin every day. Not only that, but you also have to test yourself first every time so you know your blood sugar level before you inject. Anyway, I don’t want that! No way.
Corona got in the way and I postponed my last appointment because I live in another city for 5 months now to take care of my 86 year old stepmom. Who, me? Egoistical and selfish me who haven’t lived with anybody since I was 25 years old? Yes, that me.
The point is however that I don’t want to use the public transport system to get to my hometown by bus and tram. I am also scared to death with all those people packed into a bus or a tram. I don’t want to get infected, I don’t want to get sick or worse die even by Covid-19. Although it’s mandatory to wear facial masks inside the public transport system I am not sure of other people. I am very, very careful and I am practicing social distancing, avoid crowds, and wash my hands, and wear a mask when necessary. But others? Com'on! People are fed up with the situation, they refuse to obey the rules more and more and the numbers are increasing.
The point I am making is that I postponed the appointment with my GP altogether. I am going to visit her when I am back home in my normal situation come September 1st. Is it because I am afraid she will put me on an insulin injecting regime or is it because of Corona? Or is it a little bit of both?
Anyway, I am running away from it all, figuratively speaking. This is the first time I write about my angst for those insulin injections. I am contemplating just refusing to inject, but I don’t think that’s a possibility. On the other hand, it’s my body and my choice of what to do or not to do. Or is it?
It’s a predicament. And I am only a few weeks away from September. Then I am going home and I do have to make that appointment then. And then I will know. Oh, boy.