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Rated: 18+ · Book · Family · #1201314
Who am I, Where am I Going, and Where have I been? The story of my life!
Jan 11, 2007

Today, I start attempting to keep one of my goals this year. To write daily. A little about me. I'm a 35 year old mother of 2, married for almost 15 years. I live in urban Indiana and currently stay at home and am a full time student. What makes me different from anyone else? Not much. lol...I have a strange sense of humor. I love to read. I love to sing. I like to play online. I lost both of my parents 6 years ago. Each year things get easier, except in a way they also get harder. Only somone who has been there will have any clue what I mean.

Why am I here? I feel compelled to write. A few years ago my husband and I took a bible study course at church called Disciple 1. Awesome Awesome study. 34 weeks, 80% of the bible. At the begining we had to discuss why we were there...my pat answer was to learn more abou the bible. Funny thing was, in the end, I'd learned a whole lot more. I learned I could have a personal relationship with God. I learned alot of things. I learned about spiritual gifts....and in the end of that study, we had to get up and give a testimony about our time in disciple and what we had learned....my first entry will be that testimony I shared with our congregation that day...the only changes I've made are to remove names.

My plan for this journal/blog is to just talk about me, my daily life, my kids, and whatever God puts on my heart. Pray for me that I may be obedient in this.

Check out these links! Pleeeease :)

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#1054725 by Not Available.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

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I look forward to touching base with whomever stops in....

God's blessing on you

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February 23, 2007 at 5:34pm
February 23, 2007 at 5:34pm
I know, second entry for today but I wanted to let y'all know Chapter 1 of "Invalid Item is up...scarily so...lol

It needs work...probably major work. I'm not even sure it's gonna work that way and would love it if anyone would take a look at it for me...you can just email me if you dont' wanna rate/review...I don't care..but would appreciate it if you would just let me know if it works..or if I need to scrap it and start over on how I portray the chapter...

We are headed out to meet my beloved for dinner and grocery shopping. I'll be back on later

blessings- from a very nervous writer-why is it this story bothers me more than anything I've posted?
February 23, 2007 at 3:37pm
February 23, 2007 at 3:37pm
Feb 23, 2007

Just in case you didn't know, 4 year old boys don't like to stay still long enough to snuggle. Each month mom gets less and less lovin. There are certain times that are exceptions...one of those being right when he wakes up from nap-if no one else is here or up....that makes today even more rare..because when J takes a nap, he's usually the last one up...and it's usually after the big kids get home. Now, I only got 5 minutes..a kiss, a hug, a sippy of milk, and snuggled on momma til the big kids hit the door...was a nice little gift. leaving momma feeling loved and special. Until the big kids hit the door...lol..they are much more interesting than laying on mom on the couch. *Smile*

Today has gone decently well and I am feeling better. I slept most of yesterday, all last night, and again this morning once everyone was out the door. My headache is gone, my tummy is better and all that's left is a bit of the aches. And still the stuffy nose...lol

I emailed my long lost friend this morning-in response to an email she sent me..and tried to open a dialogue about this ....difference between us...I love her and am concerned she will misunderstand and no longer wish to talk to me. I dont' want to hurt her but after talking to my husband and much prayer decided that honesty is required in a friendship-and I would want nothing less from her in this or any situation. She chooses to do something that I can not condone, and don't want around my family...but I don't want to shut her out. ..I struggled...and struggled, and struggled some more. I have received one email since, a joke with an attachment and some dialogue in reference to a different email I had sent to her. I've gotten nothing since, and no phone call....as much as I'm concerned, I'm hoping she just needs time to calm down and not be angry with me before calling...I have her number, but out of respect to her...I'm not going to call unless she lets me know via email or a call that it's ok to call...probably my nerves..I don't do confrontation well...don't piss people off well (yes, I just cussed...probably the first time ever on here..and I"m leaving it...lol) Please say a prayer for the situation.

On a positive note-I think I have figured out-after much wrestling-to how to continue "Invalid Item
Don't run look yet, I haven't started..I will when I finish this..lol..if the kids will allow it...Thanks again to everyone who has been so encouraging...

This is apparently entry # 50...I've gotten 568 views at this point..wow...who woulda thought anyone would be interested in my ramblings..

I am grateful today for snuggles from a little boy who probably won't snuggle much longer!

flingin wub and hugs
February 21, 2007 at 3:46pm
February 21, 2007 at 3:46pm
Feb 21, 2007

Today is Ash Wednesday. If you are Catholic...I know you know what this is...If you are a practicing Christian, you may. Otherwise, bare with me...I'll be moving on to the personal and emotional details after I trek down memory lane.

Ash Wednesday is the start of Lent...a time of preparing for the crucifixtion and resurrection of Jesus Christ. As a child, I went to catholic schools. Ash Wednesday meant I went to church during the day and got out of class. It meant I had to wear a spot of ashes on my head all day, had to "give something up" and that they didn't serve anything but fish on Friday. My parents were catholic but because both of them were disabled they weren't required(do to medical reasons) to fast.

I don't remember much of a change to that attitude in high school or early on in my marriage. In the last few years, it has come to mean more. When I give up something I try to make it something that will help me grow closer to Christ. A few years ago, I gave up chocolate. I am a chocoholic..but I did it. I was proud of me. And then 2 days after Easter I had the worst migraine I'd ever had. Suddenly I'd found one of my triggers and probably the reason the Holy Spirit led me to give up chocolate. I still eat chocolate but in moderation. I still get migraines...so I know it's more than chocolate but that's an entirely different story.

The year before that I gave up compter time..I still got on it, but I gave it up when the kids were awake and limited my time after they were in bed.

I don't think that in order to grow closer to God or to be more like Christ we have to give anything up. I think it can be intentionally adding something. So this year, I"m not giving anything up. Instead, I'm going to commit...and I'm going to ask y'all to help me....to reading my bible every day during nap time. I'm really bad about taking time with God or being in the word..unless I'm in a structured bible study (which I'm not right now)In a way, I will be giving something up, because that is also one of my times on here that I spend..while things are quiet..but I will still be here during nap time...just putting God first.

What are you going to do to grow closer to Him this Lenten season? He gave up His life for you..and in return all He wants..is all of you. Anybody wanna be bible buddies or prayer partners? Email me.

Ok, the other side of Ash Wednesday on my memory trek is much more emotional. In 2002, Ash Wednesday was also in Feb-I don't remember the date. What I do remember is it was just a few weeks after my dad had died. It was also the point at which I knew God would be taking Momma from me soon as well. Ash Wednesday, Mom went to church and then her friends took her to the hospital. She was in there for abot 10 days...she had pneumonia and was retaining fluids (mom had bilateral nephrostomy tubes-spelling is probably wrong..dont' know what it is feel free to ask) My parents had been divorced for 11 years..but I had prayed many times when mom was in the hospital for God to take Dad before he took Mom..I knew emotionally I woudln't be able to hold dad up..they were still friends, he still loved her...I didn't expect him to have taken them so closely together...but..that's another issue...anyway, it was that hospitalization, that day..that I turned to my beloved and told him this would be it. She went home 10 days later...and was back in in less than a week. Again retaining fluids..this time with a kidney infection as well. We almost lost her...we spent time in ICU...and as mom always seemed to do, she turned a corner, bounced back and made us think we were wrong yet again....within 2 days, I got a phone call from my sister...telling me the end was near, mom knew she was going to die and I needed to come. I flew ...I lived an hour away..I drove it in less than 45 min. She died that night. March 21, 2002. approximately 6 weeks after my dad...the Friday before Palm Sunday.

In the past few years, as I've gotten to know God better...I've changed my mind about Lent and what I need to be doing...but I can't lie to you...especially when it falls during February...Christ's sacrifice isnt' the only one I think of. I know that sounds sacreligious. But ...He got them both...in a very short period of time...and while I believe they are both in a better place...this time of year is difficult. Please, don't just email or comment to me that you are sorry for my loss..it's been 5 years...and I know you all care about me and don't want me to be hurting. There is nothing you can do for me...what I want is for you to recognize the sacrifice God made for you. And even when your loved ones are being a pain, know that you will miss them when they are gone. Treasure all those times with them. Even if they are times spent in the hospital. Some of my fondest memories are of days spent in the hospital, talking to mom, walking the halls with mom, laughing with mom. Even though it wasn't where either one of us wanted to be.

Tonight we will be going to Ash Wednesday services (and we aren't catholic....lol) I treasure these times. I also at this time really miss our pastor that left in July..because regardless of the mask I put on to get through tonight-and I will, guaranteed...this is my private hell to deal with..not for public viewing..though I will share it with an elite few-no matter how I covered it up, he would know, confound him..that I was hurting and probably why...I owe him the fact that I survived the last few years..and I owe him the fact that I grew closer to Christ. Our new pastor is a wonderful man..who doesn't know my story, and I don't have the energy to share it with him....PK just seemed to get it...as I started to say, I treasure these special services and being in community with other believers...tonight will also be difficult. So if you could please...say a prayer for me...the next 40 days or so will be difficult..many entries and writings will probably be laced with emotion....but writing is where I can release and heal. I thank you my friends for your patience, for your prayers, and for your love.

February 20, 2007 at 2:52pm
February 20, 2007 at 2:52pm
Feb 20, 2007

The title says it all! LOL...I went to David McClain 's blog..and he's asking all sorts of deep questions..which get me started thinking and I leave a comment long enough to be a blog entry.
I mosey on over to kiyasama's blog and not only is it deep and making me think..but it's emotional too. Then I wander over toKenzie and go knee deep on polititcs and start thinking about Christians and government. I stop in Wendopolis and now I'm thinking about the books I like and why...and why is it that as much as I love to read, I hesitate to tell anyone that I like to read romance ...or even the occasional smutty book..like it makes me less than a Christian-oops...that's an entry in itself...

The list could go on and on...so what is a girl to do..

Because I am a passionate, emotional, and opinionated person...lucky you...lol...I'm going to share my thoughts and feelings on them..because they each evoked a response...and there are a few others of you out there that did too..so if i didn't name you above..know it's just because those were the ones closest to the front of my brain...if I commented ...I thought about what you were writing..promise.

But because the thoughts are long and deep..I'm only going to address them one entry at a time...and because it evoked probably the most emotional response and is sitting on my heart..I"m going to hit kiyasama's entry today. If you haven't read it..run over and read it....because she makes some very honest, very valid points. It is about online racism and how painful it can be.

What it brought up for me was how any prejudice can hurt...especially when it comes at you from a place you don't know it exists in.

The following is an exerpt of a piece of writing that I"m not yet ready to share here...or elsewhere...

"We live in a broken and fallen world. No one can be trusted, no one understands and it is every man for himself. The more self sufficient you are the better off you are….even when that comes down to your spouse or other family members, or friends. Few people know who we are deep down or what we dream or how we feel. Few of us take the risk; me included, to let other in. That comes from years and years of conditioning. One of the first lessons I remember learning from my mom was to love and accept everyone for who they were despite what they looked like, what color their skin or if they had a disability. She taught me I should find out who people were on the inside before making a decision about them. And she was right. My mom was a quadriplegic. She was judged many times, treated as if because her body didn’t work, neither did her brain. BUT….in this world…that is exactly what most people do, and while I learned very early not to judge, I learned almost as quickly that I would be judged but what I looked like, what I wore, how I sounded, who my family was. By the time I was 10 I learned to trust almost no one, even my family, with certain things, because they would laugh at me, tease me, and tell other people. God love my mother, but there was very little we did as children that the rest of the family didn’t find out about very quickly. Before I was in jr high, I learned not to tell her or anyone else about crushes I had on boys or dreams that I had (I wanted to be an actress or a gymnast….neither probable for an overweight child from lower middle class Indianapolis with handicapped parents-but there is no harm in dreaming. NO harm in reaching, in loving in feeling) And my mother meant no harm, loved me very much and never had an idea of how much it hurt. Yet those things are the same reason that later in life, I chose not to tell her that I was almost molested by a neighbor, almost raped by a boyfriend, almost ran away from home just to get away from the loneliness of being myself) I didn’t want anyone to judge me, didn’t want anyone to know the pain I felt… didn’t trust them not to crush me.

Now, understand my surprise when at 18-having broken up with my boyfriend the year before and not having a date to the prom, I wanted to go with a male friend who had graduated the year before. We had been in choir together, he'd been over to the house a few times-so my parents knew him, but there was absolutely no romantic thoughts involved. I just wanted to go to my senior prom. My mother refused to allow it. Why? Because he was black. If you didn't know it..I am white. Understand that this probably confused me the most....my mother raised me to look inside..not outside..and yet all of sudden I couldnt' go to a dance with a friend because he was a different color? We argued..to me...it was no different than being French and marrying someone who was German. She laughed at the whole idea. I went to a school that was predominatly white but lived in a neighborhood predominately black. I had friends of both races. Ultimately, I didn't get to go to the prom. Mom never did see my point..and while I understand that some of it is generational...because I have had others of basically the same generation make the same type of comments...these are good people that don't seem prejudie and would give anyone in need the shirt off their backs...but let their child enter a relationship with someone of a different race...and you can forget it all bets are off...will I feel differently when my child is the one dating...sigh...I just can't imagine I will. I know that it can be a difficult relationship and that society doesn't always agree...heck, many of you may not agree...but then again, this is my blog, my opinion..I look forward to hearing yours...

And may we all remember that our children are watching and listening..and may we not teach them one thing in life and later rip it out from under them..it hurts..and it confuses them.

I thank you all for being deep and being willing to share your thoughts and opinions...I respect each and every one of you...whether it be your blog that started this or your comments in my blog...because it's a stretch to be so very real.

blessings and hugs,

PS...I'll be back tomorrow with another deep entry...unless I get distracted...*Bigsmile*

February 19, 2007 at 10:30pm
February 19, 2007 at 10:30pm
Feb 19, 2007

Yes, it's Monday. As far as Monday's go it hasn't been too bad. We got to sleep in a bit today because we had a 2 hour delay. Which means that even though they finally went back...J was still home because he's a morning preschooler and if they delay, they don't have preschool. The child hasn't been to school in over a week and if something doesn't give soon I'm going to forget that he's actually the easier of my two children..most of the time.

Abraham Lincoln. 16th President of the United States of America. Only president to ever recieve a patent. I know lots about Abraham Lincoln. That would be because we just finished an extra credit project on him...well..it was C's choice which president to use...but this project could be worth 100 points extra credit. We've known about this for about 3 weeks and she just couldnt' decide what to do. This afternoon we finally figured that all out ( I should've pushed more for her to decide...but procrastination is our family motto..lol) The poster is actually pretty cute...The three of us did it together..and J did his part by watching a movie in big sisters room while we worked...lol...My beloved hates it when we end up helping her with stuff like this...(we have this issue with 4H too) but I think ..she's 10 and it's ok to help. She pulled the facts to use (though I did help her find the sites) She cut the printed stuff out, decided where to put stuff, etc...My husband typed stuff and printed it out...I traced hats on the board and helped look for info...maybe she should have done more...but I think...it's important for us to be involved..and she did make the decisions and did alot of the work.......thankfully it's done.

Last weekend we signed the kids up for ball....C plays softball..this will be J's first year in tball. It won't start for a couple of months...but the countdown is on. By the same token, 4H started this month. From late March/Early April until Julyish...it will be nonstop in the evenings. Especially once the games actually start. Last year we had ball 4 or 5 nights a week -games or practice(she's in fastpitch) We don't allow her to play games after 9..on school nights. School let out in June, then we had ball tournement...a week off ..then camp, a week off then 4H fair, then VBS. Then things finally slow down. This year, will be better..she is doing less projects..and she won't be going to camp until later in July ..so after tournament and fair. Ya live and ya learn.

I heard something on a Kleenex commercial tonight..and I loved it..and it fit me so well...spoke to me actually

They said basically.... I still cry...because my tears don't take away from my strength.

It helps me so much when I'm reminded of those things.

I'm wiped out tonight, so I'm going to bed. I'll catch up on blogs tomorrow. K?

Sending ya'll hugs
February 18, 2007 at 9:28pm
February 18, 2007 at 9:28pm
Feb 18, 2007

It is cold and wet outside. My nose is stuffy, my eyes are tired, and my brain won't shut off.

I know, the fact that it is cold and wet outside is not news. At least not if you read my blog entries last week. And if you didn't...well, you know now that it is cold and wet..this due to snow and ice. Which we got more of on Saturday. LOL..I'll quit whining about it now.

I don't due extreme temps. I like to be comfortable. But honestly, given the choice between hot and cold...I'd rather be cold because I can add a layer, drink something warm, take a hot shower, etc. When it's hot, yes, I can drink something cold or take a cold shower...but there are only so many layers to take off before things get a little scary. *Smile*

I'm stuffy because I still have a cold. I probably have a sinus infection and need to go to the dr...but with the roads and the weather it's probaby not going to happen real soon. NOt unless I spike a temp or get absolutely miserable. My husband takes my van instead of his little truck in nasty weather..it's safer...plus I babysit making it difficult to find time to go. And honestly...I just don't like going unless I have to....I am a big baby when I'm truly sick, so never fear..I'll end up there before I get tooo sick...lol...I just need proof I'm sick before I suck it up and go.

My eyes are tired...I"m tired...I didn't get much sleep last night...partially because I took a nap yesterday late afternoon which I should NOT have done and partially because my husband snored very loudly most of the night. I don't sleep well out of my bed..and I'm a light sleeper....so if I'd fallen asleep before he started snoring, it might have been ok...but maybe not..and going to another room doesn't work so well...then my little sunshine (J) woke up too early even though we didn't have church this morning...becuase they cancelled it(rather strange but true). I plan on making it an early night.

I had fun today with my girlfriend...honestly (God help me if she ever reads this) she's almost old enough to be my mother...but we are more friends than anything. Sometimes she's the mom and sometimes I am...and sometimes we are like two kids getting into trouble together...lol..that was where we were today. LOL..We had fun. We went to lunch at a new Mexican place in town, went to Walmart, CVS and Kroger. We laughed and we bared our souls. She's a great friend who has listened probably more than she has talked and truly cares about me. She's been through a lot herself and going through more....I have been truly blessed.

My brain won't shut off because Sabrina keeps trying to come out. If things were quiet and I weren't being interrupted every 10 minutes it would be ok. I'm hoping tomorrow will give me the chance. I wish I had someone I could talk to about writing ideas and how too's...here I mean...I just don't know whether to go at the rest of the story by having her drift into the past to tell her story...or to just have her tell it...personally I think the 1st one...but we shall see I guess....

I have a favor to ask....if you could, please keep my friend purtycurls in your prayers. She is scheduled to have surgery on Friday and is dealing with that plus the chaos of trying to be a single mom and survive without being able to work through recovery. I know she could use your prayers and lovins...

I'm gonna sign out for now..I want to hit a few more blogs (though not hard enough you will feel it, I promise.*Bigsmile* and a few more reviews and check out the contests before I go to bed. I'm also thinking of joining the A1 Writing Academy....

I'm thankful today for many things. But the two that stand out are 1. School is scheduled to be in session and on time tomorrow and 2. All of my friends but especially the one I spent the day with.

sending hugs
February 17, 2007 at 10:59pm
February 17, 2007 at 10:59pm
Feb 17, 2007

Thanks to everyone who went and checked out the begining to Sabrina's Story (link in previous entry) Both the encouragement and the critques were very much appreciated. Only once since I started coming to WDC have I been as nervous when checking my email and seeing that I had a review on something....and that was the first item I put into my portfolio. I realize through the eyes of those who have read it that I need to clarify a few things and explain a bit more. Because the details live so firmly in my mind...it's hard to remember not everyone lives in my mind as Sabrina does. LOL....

I'm scared to death. It's a good kind of scared. I want to do this. I want to make Sabrina's story live.....I want there to be a purpose to the people inside my head and I desperately want to honor my Lord and savior in doing it. Thanks partyof5dj for the reminder in your email...I'm quoting...because it meant so much to me...others might make use of it too.."God put her in your heart and He'll lead her, and you, where she needs to go.
> > You'll know it's right if you trust that."

That helped to be told that......I was also reminded that to honor God, doesn't mean I have to write about Him...He will do His work regardless....

Thanks for the encouragement from everyone and especially the comment that LK Hunsaker who told me that if the character was so strong I should get her out in print. And to vivacious who has been telling me that all along.

I don't know where Sabrina's Story will go...but I'm thankful y'all are along for the ride...

Now that I"ve been all sappy and deep with y'all...I have to share a story...about both of my chidren from today.

We went out this morning to run some errands. C's glasses got broken a while back and they called and told us they were in...she's supposed to be wearing them for reading, computer, etc..and she hates them. While we were in the eye dr's to pick them up...you could tell she was less than thrilled...I thanked the lady on the way out..and made the comment that you could tell that C was overjoyed...in the way of sort of an apology for the attitude. The lady at the store just laughed and said..I have teenagers. I replied..yeah, well she's 10. The ladies comment...you are in trouble. She's so right. The attitude just seeps through so badly sometimes...other times she fine...but there are days I want to just reach out and touch her upside the head...

The other one is much cuter....after we went to WallyWorld and the eye dr's..we went to get something to eat. We went to an all you can eat place. J got a chicken leg, green beans, noodles, a roll and some fruit. He's a decent eater and on a growth spurt...about half way through the meal, I told him he needed to eat his green beans.. ..He said "Are they naked?" I thought the waitress walking by was going to drop the dishes she was carrying...lol...I replied that yes, they were naked...he doesn't like a bunch of seasoning and such...lol

Anyway, it's getting late and I need to do a few more things before I hit the bed. Church has been cancelled for tomorrow...they can't get the parking lot cleaned out enough to make it safe...*Frown* So we will be sleeping in, which I like, but I will miss being with my church family. Then a friend of mine (from church) and I will be going to the store and out to lunch. Some girl time will be nice to have!

Blessings and Peace,

February 16, 2007 at 8:36pm
February 16, 2007 at 8:36pm
Feb 16, 2007

Second entry...a very quick and short one...but not the shortest ever...lol

I did it. I actually did it. I have sat here several times since I joined WDC and talked about the voices in my head and trying to put them on paper...I did it. I started a new book...I wrote an intro and a 1st chapter....I"m a bit scared. I'm not sure it's even any good or where it will go.

I'm kind of waiting to see how it reviews before I decide whether to write anymore on it or trash it and head another direction.

Big sigh...wow.

What a week of writing.

if you haven't been to my previous entry....please go read it....there is some very interesting info on some very interesting characters here in blogville....


If you wanna look you can...but I don't want to beg...lol

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February 16, 2007 at 2:32pm
February 16, 2007 at 2:32pm
Feb 16, 2007

I am very proud of me. I stepped out of my comfort zone and wrote 2 new pieces, 1 yesterday and 1 today. Both are for contests I entered. I'm a little nervous. Happy with one, not so happy with the other
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#1218597 by Not Available.
is for the 69 word contest..and now that someone caught the error I made it's decent, I think. Originally the forth line read top shelf of the panty...instead of pantry...quite the faux pas..lol...quite the giggle followed that review...let me tell you...And 3 people read it before I posted it and didn't catch it! Goes to show we see what we want to...lol

The other one
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#1218981 by Not Available.
is just a silly little piece and I'm not so very sure of it at all. Poetry is not my typical genre, I'm not very good at it and I'm rather nervous on both counts.

You see...up to now, I've primarily written what comes from the heart. Much of it is led by the Holy Spirit and I have very little to say outside of what is led ...if that makes sense...I want to write and be connected to the Holy Spirit anytime I write..not just when the words come pouring out of me...does this make sense to anybody? I struggle with this...I feel called to write, compelled to write. I believe God led me here to WDC...I'm not a writer in my own right...but through Him I am...
so I struggle writing that which isn't streaming out of me.....please somoene tell me I'm not alone in this....I want my writing to honor God and be used to touch others...sometimes I feel like this blog gives me a chance to do that...even when it's opening up my heart and soul to y'all..I've found I'm not alone...and in turn, so do others...as my newfound twin has informed me, purtycurls and so I and others are at times fed...and that's great

But I have things I want to write....ideas, characters...and when I start..it doesn't flow, doesn't come out right...One in particular has been with me a long time and I haven't figured out a way to give voice to her...but I know I'm meant to...she's been around too long..again, please someone tell me you know what I'm talking about!??

Ok-this was so not the way I had planned to go for this entry...lol....as such I'm moving right along...
I've given quite a few reviews in the last few days and read a lot of good material. There are some very talented writers here..but then, y'all knew that...now I'm going to vent..and it's not about reviewing and it's not exactly about being reviewed..and then again it is....Is it not good form to make sure that when you review someone's work...to make sure that your review can be read? That it can be followed. That thoughts are seperated from one another? I don't mind that the rating wasn't 5 stars...cause this particular piece is not very good in my own opinion..though I'd love to fix it. But trying to follow the reviewers train of thought was not fun. Almost 700 words in one paragraph. At least one run on sentence...and while he/she made a valid point....I was only given a very general idea of what was needed to fix it. I know all reviewing is personal, subjective, and styles change from one person to the next. I guess my question is this...typically I respond to my reviews and let them know what I thought, thanking them etc...if I'm in a place where I"m not able to be subjective about it and it's too personal I wait..frankly, I feel like laying it out just like I did above. Am I way off base? Do I keep my mouth shut and just not respond? What does WDC etiquette say? ( I know I probably misspelled that one)

One last thing and I'll quit rambling...the kids are home again today. I've got J and the 2 boys I babysit down for a nap..well the two I babysit are napping...J is in his bed reading books and making noise. I don't care if he sleeps as long as he rests and lets them sleep...he still needs a nap...because if he doesn't get one you know it by about 7pm. I went in there to remind him to lay down and be quiet instead of making noise and advised him if I had to come in again to tell him to be quiet I would swat his hind-end. I then asked him if he was going to be quiet. His response to me...I don't know. I had tears in my eyes from trying not to laugh...I hugged him and told him I loved him...he then responded by grabbing me and telling me he wasn't going to let me go...so we stood there and cudddled for a few..times like this I wish he had a regular bed and I'd have climbed in with him ( he has a mini loft ) At least he's an honest kid! lol

Ok, I know I said one last thing...but I have to make another statement...some of you, heck, many of you may know this but as it was news to me...I had to share it...kind of like gossip but since I can send you to the source it's not really..*Shock**Shock* .this morning I was looking at the list of most viewed blogs...and David McClain 's first blog "Invalid Itemis up near the top...and so I thought I'd take a look...it's a full book, having been maxed out to 500 quite a while ago...and I went in and read the last entry. Much to my surprise in that last entry he was patting ccstring on the back, telling him he did good and that he's talented! Now, personally I believe they are both quite talented...but I almost fell out of my chair in shock...then I decided to head over and backtrack to the begining of ccstring's blog and lo and behold..he was saying nice things about David McClain too. And telling those who were here they were "good friends" and to feel sorry for David McClain ...and ccstring back then, knew how to spell women so did he lose grammar and spelling skills here (as it appears) or is he actually much smarter than he lets on...I believe I know the answer...lol...but

Inquiring minds want to know...lol

I'm thankful for good friends, a good belly laugh and the fact that I'm capable of throwing snowballs at ya if things get tooo hot.


February 14, 2007 at 10:49pm
February 14, 2007 at 10:49pm
Feb 14, 2007

Happy Valentines Day to all my new friends. God has blessed me by knowing each and every one of you!

I'm grateful for my beloved

blessings, hugs
February 13, 2007 at 5:33pm
February 13, 2007 at 5:33pm
Feb 13,2007

I have a swing popcicle, several branch and tree popcicles, wire popcicles, and even a van popcicle. I'll gladly share...let me send 6 inches of plain snowcone ingredients to you as well.

Yes, that's right..we are in the midst of a winter storm warning. We have ice on everything. We have snow and ice on the ground...so thick that my 40 pound son (who is 4) can now walk on top of it! Earlier, he fell on it..and the only thing that went through was the toes of his boots..and his knees when he got up.

School is closed...today and tomorrow. My husband's boss (God bless him) called this morning to tell him not to come in. We're not sure if anyone went in or if they, knowing he had almost an hour trip, just told him not to come in. The county just to the north of us is under a snow emergency...we are less than a mile on 3 sides of that county..we would have to drive through it to get almost anywhere....

All in all it's been a decent day though. We all slept in. My beloved got some church stuff done on the computer, the kids have watched tv and played outside. They've played on the computer. We walked down to the mailbox (because supposedly the mail is still running) It takes about 5 min to walk to the mailbox...not too terribly bad. We went to put something in the mailbox to be picked up....my beloved and my children just went to check and see if we have mail...I declined the offer to go. Big weenie I know..but it's gotten colder still. They took the softball bats with them to hit snowballs...lol...I wish I'd known they were going to do that before I declined..but my beloved already had my jacket on under his to stay warm..I wasn't going to take it away from him.

I am grateful today for power..electricity. Though there are many many people in Indiana without power..and even though we may yet lose our power (lots of ice on the lines) at this point we still have power. It has flickered a time or two...but for the most part we are dry, warm, and safe.

I remember a time we were out of school on a snow day..years ago....the drifts were so deep we actually tunneled through them to the back yard!

I am sure we are not alone in this ...much of the midwest has been hit to my understanding...and I know New York was supposed to get really hit.

Stay warm, stay dry, and stay off the roads if you are in nasty weather. Pray for those who have no power...and those who have no homes.

February 11, 2007 at 7:54pm
February 11, 2007 at 7:54pm
Curious yet?

Feb 11, 2007

On Friday my delightful 10 year old daughter brought home the class pet...or should I say pets. 5 hermit crabs. There names are Snoopy, Shiny, Angelica, Buttercup, and one whose name we can't remember. I was less than thrilled with new guests...they were unexpected and I have not signed a permission slip for these to come to my house. Had I been sent one I would have, doing my parental duty and all. However, I know NOTHING, let me repeat NOTHING about hermit crabs. My daughter, appears brunette but has very blonde roots ( no offense to anyone meant). Our first conversation about them follows: She comes in the door with them and tells me, I need salt. We have to put salt in their water. How much salt says I? I dunno she tells me. My teacher just puts salt in the water and shakes it up. Sweetheart, mommy needs to know how much. She shrugs. So I look it up on the internet. Know what I discovered? Table salt can kill hermit crabs. They need sea salt. I don't have sea salt. We live 1 hour from a pet store, 30 minutes from Walmart. I'm not planning on doing either...remember..we had plans this weekend. The whole reason they came home with her THIS WEEKEND...her teacher was out sick and so was the person assigned to be hermit helper. So the sub let her volunteer. Remind me to send my dogs to her as a thank you. :)

Yesterday evening, after having been gone for a few hours, we discovered that their sand was quite wet. She had bathed them earlier in the day, they'd been given water in a shell to drink (we had nothing else to give it to them in) but it shouldn't have been THAT wet. I told her to just wait and we would check it out in the morning...me assuming it would be drier...I swear to you this morning it appeared the sand was sitting at lowtide because it was that wet. I was a bit worried about one of them and decided we needed to do something...let me interject we overslept and didn't make it to church...so the morning wasn't running so hot anyway...

We decided to bathe the hermit crabs, put them in something to dry out and use the blow dryer to dry the sand. My beloved was trying to study his current chapter for his business class..but he pitched in and helped us. We put the hermit crabs in the water...very shallow water, and then put them in a lid to dry off. Then my beloved put the blow dryer through the lid on the habitat and put a towel around it to keep the sand from blowing out. Periodically he took the blow dryer out, used a fork to mix up the sand so it would all get dry. Imagine our surprise when the heat from the blow dryer melted the habitat! Holy Cow Batman, we have a problem!

We called our "local" Walmart and they weren't answering in the pet department. So we called one half an hour in the other direction. They had one...so because it is smaller than ours..and I needed to go into that town to pick up some prescriptions anyway, we went to the one that wouldn't answer. Yeah, good choice. They clearenced theirs on Friday...they are ALL GONE. So now what? We were supposed to already be at Mike's best friends to do our taxes. So we took the hermit crabs and went to do the taxes..then went an hour the nearest pet store to buy a new habitat. This is just a transport case..not the big one from the classroom. Thank God above! Bought new sand. Then went to grab a bite to eat.

The hermit crabs are safe and dry. Assuming they live through the night. They still have to be given some water to drink and make the trip back on the bus in the morning. With a note to the teacher explaining what has happened to the old one.

Ok, I've covered crabs, heat and taxes. That leaves me with tea

Next Saturday our church youth group is hosting a tea party. I volunteered to bake something. I'm not a great cook but I can bake. They are trying to make it a true english tea party. So I need your help. I need a simple recipe for little cakes or tarts. But remember keep it simple! NO stress here...but I"d like to make something somewhat authentic..yet simple...cause I will be making it no earlier than Friday....

I've not hit anyone's blog all weekend..( I know you are either bowing down thanking God or trembling in fear) I'm on my way to visit as time allows.

I'm grateful that this weekend we had the money to replace the habitat. $13 shouldn't be a big deal..but around here it could have been.

Have to get J to bed and C in the shower for school tomorrow. J has a dentist appt in the morning...he hit his mouth on the coffee table last week and his top two teeth still hurt so she wants to see him...hmmm yippy skippy.

blessings and hugs
February 10, 2007 at 12:37pm
February 10, 2007 at 12:37pm
Feb 10, 2007

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** This was given to me by Stephanie Grace

I'm like a child with a new toy! I want everyone to see what I was gifted!

I do tend to look at the world through rose colored glasses..at least most of the time. I think hoping and looking for the best..giving people a chance and the benefit of the doubt is the only way for me to handle life. That doesn't mean I'm blind to how people behave. It doesn't mean I don't know that it may not work out that way. But what does it hurt to give them a chance to react well.

I've been this way most of my life. I tend to be able to see both sides of a situation...even when and especially if I'm involved. Sometimes this doesn't do me so well...because it makes it difficult to be mad..stay mad...and sometimes to defend myself. I have been walked on and screwed over because of my tendency to give second chances or listen a little too long. But even so, it's one thing I wouldn't change about me. I'd rather be fair and not one sided.

After I lost my parents, things were difficult. And for a very long time I was very cynical. I questioned everything and everyone's reasoning. I looked mostly at the down side. I just didn't have it in me. I still have those moments...but I'm usually harder on me than anyone else. God has worked in my and still is. I'm trying to let Him...

I don't really have a point to all this. I love the little bear...it's very sweet and a very nice tribute.

We had fun last night at my beloved's best friends house. We played a dice game called Farkle...it may have another name but we don't know what it is..lol...Lots of laughs, lots of pizza, came in late. E is a very nice guy who has been dealt a rather nasty lot in life sometimes but is very sweet just the same. It breaks my heart that I can't do more than just be a friend. Big sigh. It's just in my nature to want to help...to want to save the world....but as our previous pastor- PK- used to tell me. Christ has already come to save us...you ain't Him...get over the God complex. Easier said than done.

Well, we are headed out. Lots of running to do. We have to go to the bank, the pharmacy (J has a sinus infection-another one..ugg) and this and that...later we are going to the inlaws for dinner.

Have a wonderful day, Hug yourselves for me and remember..frown and the world wonders what is wrong with you...grin and they wonder what you've done!

I'm grateful today for the sunshine!

February 9, 2007 at 3:21pm
February 9, 2007 at 3:21pm
Feb 9, 2007

Today has been a pretty busy day. Good day too. This morning we woke up with no delay...which means..drum roll please.....J got to go to school. Did you see the very bright flash of light in the darkness this morning...about 7:05...that was the grin he flashed his bus driver when she pulled up! He was so HAPPY! I took them to the bus, came back and went to bed for a bit. J gets home at 11 and he bounced in the door...still VERY happy. He played with his legos until lunchtime, watched more Full House ( I think he has a crush or something..lol) and then his Headstart Homebound Teacher came. She was here for an hour and a half. They had so much fun and he bounced around and played with her. She left, we rolled the ball a bit and now he's running around again. When C gets home (in about 20 mine) we will be going to play with the boys I generally babysit...the younger of them had his toncils and adenoids out on Wed. His mom is at home with him going absolutely bonkers! He is so very cranky and whiny. Yesterday he wanted J to come over and play..so we decided on today. I'll get the big kids from the bus stop and head over. Then we are going to my beloved's best friends house to play cards. There will just be 3 adults and our 2 kids...the kids will play and watch tv and we will play cards. His best friend is pretty cool...he's like my big brother which makes it nice. We all have a pretty good time together but I also know that I have no worries when the 2 of them are alone...LOL....

So do you have plans for the weekend? Nothing major here that I know of..lol...We did have plans for Sunday ..we were going to go see our former pastor at his new church...only he has too much gong on and it's a special service so I guess we are going to wait.

Well, not much else going on today...planning on lots of laughs tonight.

thanks for the support from yesterday...It's over and done with and all worked out...live and learn..then get luvs..oh no, wait...that's a commercial *Bigsmile*

Oh Yeah...one question...certain people keep talking about stats...I've looked at my stats on my pieces..but don't know where to look as to where I stack up against other blogs...doesn't really matter to me but seeing others talk about it just makes me curious...is there a list somewhere or something???


I'm thankful today for school! *Wink*

February 8, 2007 at 5:15pm
February 8, 2007 at 5:15pm
Feb 8, 2007

It may be ramblings, it may be rantings, it may be venting. Be warned. LOL

Today has been a decent day. We had a 2 hr delay again. So we slept in a bit and then got up, did breakfast and walked to the bus stop. I decided to take the advice given to me yesterday and make the most of my time with J...he's a good boy and a lot of fun..my nerves are shot but I did my best. When we walked to the bus stop I put him in his boots and snow suit as well as hat, coat, and gloves. He was thrilled to get to walk through the yard.lol. At the bus stop, he threw snow at me and laughed. Then he threw it up in the air and said "Mom it's raining snow!" LOL...I've tried to explain it's not raining snow...it's snowing..but he won't change it and I've decided it's not life threatening..it can be called raining snow..and in his 4 year old mind, it works.

We put big sister on the bus and walked back home. It's less than a 5 min walk up the road. Then we made it rain more snow in the yard..at his command. Once we got tooo cold (about 10 min) we came in to get warm. He wanted to leave his snow suit and boots on, because he likes them...lol..so we did. We ended up back outside about 15 minutes later...because "he warmed up really quick!" We stayed out a bit then came in when Mommy coudln't take it anymore. We played Perfection (which he plays like a puzzle) We played Don't Break the Ice, and then we played Candy Land. Have you ever tried to play Candy Land with a child who moves at high speeds anyway? He wanted to race the people around the board. Every move he made had sound effects...funny, very cute..by the end of the game it was grating on my nerves. He built me a lego ship while I made tea. Then he played on the computer at www.pbskids.org He played the teletubbies game. I don't like Teletubbies..but I like the game there because he can actually play it himself without me having to sit right beside him. So I fixed lunch..his choice...we had grilled cheese. I let him pick out a movie while we ate. He wanted to watch something adorable. Yes, those are his words. He wanted to watch his sisters Full House DVD's...lol...So we did. Then he took a nap. THank you Jesus I was going to lose it. We read a story first..as we always do..he does sit still to be read to..mostly..lol

While he was napping I decided to do some reviewing. This is not something I"m good at..but it's part of WDC and I know the more reviewing I do, the more people will come visit me...and I know how much I enjoy when people stop by. I try to always be positive and encouraging. But I have to say I'm not overly patient. If there's alot that has to be fixed...I'm not going to do an indepth review. I'm not good enough at it for starters. Spelling I'm fairly good with. Grammar I am not. I leave that for those who are good at it. I try to concentrate on what I thought, how it made me feel, whether I understood it, etc. If I notice anything with spelling or grammar I will tell them, but it is rare that I notice grammar issues..they have to be pretty bad. Occasionally I will advise if something seems to wordy ..but again, it is one of my own flaws and I don't always pick up on it. My point...I reviewed several this afternoon...trying to do more of that as I said. One of the people emailed me back asking what could be improved or what needed to be changed. I emailed back and tried to explain to the best of my ability that I didn't think anything needed to be changed but I did explain what had been confusing to me....I have no problem answering that..I didn't rate the piece lowly..I went back and checked...yet I've had a back and forth email with them this afternoon...I don't know if they are just one that wants to pick a fight or what...I rated the dingdang piece a 4.5! I, personally did find it a bit "confusing" for lack of a better word..but also know that it may be me. I was polite, I was positive, and I have done everything I can, including apologize if they were offended...I know that I have handled this as best I can. Because I am a newbie though...this also makes me not want to go do anymore rating and reviewing. I won't stop..don't get me wrong...but it does make me think twice about doing it.

I just recieved another email...and I almost deleted the above..because now it is a moot point. The writer and I ...or actually I..misunderstood..and while I thought she was replying to argue with me on my rating and review..she was trying to explain the informative piece for my benefit. We have made peace and I'm going to let it go..just goes to show you though that it is difficult at times to understand one another in written form...it leaves certain things...such as emotion....out of the picture. I didn't delete because maybe my misunderstanding will help someone else think twice when they are concerned someone is arguing with them...or whatever.

I had more to write..but find myself not quite in the mood to write more at this time. I am an emotional being and this all upset me. I also need to go start supper, load the dishwasher and fold some laundry. I'll be back on later this evening....once the kids are in bed and my beloved and I have spent some time together.

God bless you all. I am grateful for the ability to apologize

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

I think I need a hug
February 7, 2007 at 9:42am
February 7, 2007 at 9:42am
Feb 7, 2007

Ok, you can blame my pastor for this one! LOL. He gave a sermon this Sunday and one things he said stuck with me and I've been trying to figure out what I need to apply it to in my life...so bare with me and follow along and if you have any ideas or thoughts on the subject I would LOVE to hear them.

In Chapter 12 of Exodus we are told (NIV)
37 The Israelites journeyed from Rameses to Succoth. There were about six hundred thousand men on foot, besides women and children. 38 Many other people went up with them, as well as large droves of livestock, both flocks and herds. 39 With the dough they had brought from Egypt, they baked cakes of unleavened bread. The dough was without yeast because they had been driven out of Egypt and did not have time to prepare food for themselves. 40 Now the length of time the Israelite people lived in Egypt was 430 years. 41 At the end of the 430 years, to the very day, all the Lord's divisions left Egypt. 42 Because the Lord kept vigil that night to bring them out of Egypt, on this night all the Israelites are to keep vigil to honor the Lord for the generations to come.

Ok, think about this for a sec...and you might see where I'm headed in a minute..lol...

The Isrealites were in slavery for most of that 430 years if not all of it. I'm not sure if that starts from when Joseph brought his family into Egypt to save them from starvation or not. But it's amazing to me that a people who had been dealt with so harshly for so long gave Moses and God so much trouble once they were out of Egypt...I mean I understand they were ready to leave and I also understand it was familiar and safe....and the desert was not..it was scary..but guaranteed..anything that separates us from God, any sin we do easily and without thinking has probably been going on for quite a while..and it's going to take time to break it. Take time to get it out of us...

Fastforward to chapter 19 which says 1 In the third month after the Israelites left Egypt--on the very day--they came to the Desert of Sinai. 2 After they set out from Rephidim, they entered the Desert of Sinai, and Israel camped there in the desert in front of the mountain. 3 Then Moses went up to God, and the Lord called to him from the mountain and said, "This is what you are to say to the house of Jacob and what you are to tell the people of Israel: 4 'You yourselves have seen what I did to Egypt, and how I carried you on eagles' wings and brought you to myself. 5 Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant, then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession. Although the whole earth is mine, 6 you will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.' These are the words you are to speak to the Israelites." 7 So Moses went back and summoned the elders of the people and set before them all the words the Lord had commanded him to speak. 8 The people all responded together, "We will do everything the Lord has said." So Moses brought their answer back to the Lord.
In between the two sections they've already questioned and tested the Lord and wished themselves back to Egypt...saying it would be better to die there full than in the desert hungry. God was patient and loving and provided them with food and water. Then we come the passage above from 19 and they are going to do everything God has said.

Boy do I do this. I question, I test, I argue and then I realize it's SOOOO much better when God's in charge and I tell him, I'll do it your way..everything you say..becasue what you are telling me I recognize is for the best. All this is before God gives them the 10 Commandments. Fastforward to chapter 32 and they are making false idols because Moses has been gone too long and they think he's dead...they give up on God and decide to find another "god" to go before them...how often do we replace God with something else? When things aren't going our way...or even when they are? We don't have to bow down physically to them...it can be money, tv, time, even our family...if it gets between us and God...that's a scary and difficult thing for me. I desire for God to be 1st but it sure doesn't always work that way! (And I'm not even to what my pastor said on Sunday that started all of this..lol) Though God got angry with them, and I'm sure us when we turn away from Him, He still forgave them and stayed with them...and forgives us and stays with us.

Fastforward to Numbers 14 where it says
17 "Now may the Lord's strength be displayed, just as you have declared: 18 'The Lord is slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.' 19 In accordance with your great love, forgive the sin of these people, just as you have pardoned them from the time they left Egypt until now."

20 The Lord replied, "I have forgiven them, as you asked. 21 Nevertheless, as surely as I live and as surely as the glory of the Lord fills the whole earth, 22 not one of the men who saw my glory and the miraculous signs I performed in Egypt and in the desert but who disobeyed me and tested me ten times-- 23 not one of them will ever see the land I promised on oath to their forefathers. No one who has treated me with contempt will ever see it. 24 But because my servant Caleb has a different spirit and follows me wholeheartedly, I will bring him into the land he went to, and his descendants will inherit it. 25 Since the Amalekites and Canaanites are living in the valleys, turn back tomorrow and set out toward the desert along the route to the Red Sea." 26 The Lord said to Moses and Aaron: 27 "How long will this wicked community grumble against me? I have heard the complaints of these grumbling Israelites. 28 So tell them, 'As surely as I live, declares the Lord, I will do to you the very things I heard you say: 29 In this desert your bodies will fall--every one of you twenty years old or more who was counted in the census and who has grumbled against me. 30 Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. 31 As for your children that you said would be taken as plunder, I will bring them in to enjoy the land you have rejected. 32 But you--your bodies will fall in this desert. 33 Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the desert. 34 For forty years--one year for each of the forty days you explored the land--you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you.' 35 I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this desert; here they will die."

The walk they took...starting from Egypt and going to the promised land, historians and scholars say, should have taken 6 weeks. Because of their disobedience it took 40 years. It wasn't that it took 40 years to get the Isrealites out of Egypt...it took 40 years to get Egypt out of the Isrealites. What's in bold is what my pastor said on Sunday that struck me to the very core. I'm still chewing on that(fyi-anything I spend time thinking on deeply-I refer to as chewing on..lol)

It makes sense. It really does. How many times when we hit difficulties, we wonder why it's taking so long. It could be timing. It could be a combination of many things. Maybe we have something to learn. Or unlearn. Maybe it's to bring us closer to God.

One of the biggest issues we (my family and I) have had is financial difficulties. We struggle. God brings us through every time. But somehow it's like a roller coaster. We do ok for a while, then something happens and down we go. And then He sees us through and we come back out on the other side. Right now, we have been having some major issues...medical bills from when we didn't have insurance among other things...and there just isnt' extra money to put towards them each month..my beloved was off work for almost 4 months....and just started a new job in Dec....and it's very frustrating to be back in the slump again (mind you, things financial are better than they were a few months ago..but I want to be out of the mess) So, our pastors statement on Sunday got me to wondering...is there something God is trying to get "out of us" before bringing us into financial security? More importantly...are they other places in my life, other "Egypts to be taken out of me", so that I can enjoy the "land of milk and honey" that God has planned for my life? I'm still processing all of this and trying to figure it out in reference to my life. I want to be what God wants and I want to dwell in Him. I can't do that if I'm serving my own desires....very interested to hear your thoughts....cause I just can't quite grasp whatever it is I'm supposed to from this...(not that there is something necessarily..but I have this sense within me that that particular statement God wants me to pay attention to.

Big Sigh

Kids are home from school today because of weather and snow. We got about 6 inches yesterday and it's bitter cold. J got up at 7:30. C just got up...it's 9:30. She's eating (J and I already ate) and then it's time to get the day moving...rarely am I in my PJ's this late...

Can I go take a nap now? lol

Ok, signing off...see you in your blogs...

OH, by the way..I am feeling a bit better..though my throat is very sore. My beloved bought me some ice cream on the way home *Bigsmile*


February 6, 2007 at 6:51pm
February 6, 2007 at 6:51pm
Feb 6, 2007

Above quote take from The Spider and the Fly
by Mary Howitt

wanna read the entire thing?

you can go here: http://www.love-poems.me.uk/howitt_the_spider_and_the_fly_funny.htm
I am cold

Today has been a decent, though cold and snowy day. The kids were on a two hour delay again, which is ok with me, but not with J..as he doesn't have preschool when they delay. I have a feeling they will call school off tomorrow but I could be wrong.

I'm so very cold.

I have a cold. Actually, I'm afraid it may be the flu, because one of the boys I babysit had it last week. C didn't feel good either but I kind of blew it off due to not using her nasal spray correctly..or more clearly stated, not telling me the bottle was almost empty. She never ran a fever either...but she and J had flu shots. In December. I did not. Why is it as mothers we tend to take care of everyone else and put ourselves last? Why is it we don't think about the fact that if we don't take care of us we can't take care of them? Ah well. My beloved woke up feeling like this yesterday and is feeling a bit better today so there is hope...temp is only 99.1..not really even a temp (unless you take in to account I run low to begin with and took ibuprofen earlier...lol....I'm a worry wart..I'm sure it will all be fine.

Did I tell you I don't like to be cold?

J was running a bit ago and hit his top teeth on the table. He cried. Alot. Now this kid's pretty tough and nothing stops him for long. He still cries half an hour later if you bring up him hitting the table and he's still complaining of it hurting, though there's no blood, his teeth aren't loose and I don't see any swelling. I called the dentist..but they closed early due to the weather.

I'm so ready for spring

My husband is driving home in this nasty mess...he left 1hr and 25 minutes ago...he works an hour a way and it maybe another hour and a half before he makes it home. Did I tell you I'm a worrier..I know that doesn't honor God and I have been praying and I know that he's in God's hands..but worry I do anyway. Good thing God loves me no matter what...I keep messin it up

My head is soooo full. I keep sneezing and I can't breathe. I have a sore throat but other than that I'm fine...mostly...lol

Well, I'm only going to whine if I stay here blogging...I don't know anything major...can't think through the snot enough to be cutesy...lol

Oh yeah, my writing..today I helped my beloved write a paper for class..it's a group project. He just found out yesterday which group he's in because the professor skipped him when they were assigned. The project was due today. He contributed as they asked him to and then today they sent out the rough draft! Oh my goodness! This is a college senior level business course. You would think that they would have some idea of what a good paper sounds like. It wasn't bad I suppose but the redundancy and some of the other issues were very annoying. We edited it..with him at work and me here..via IM and then sent it to my mil to proofread. Hopefully they won't be upset with him...He didn't submit or anything..just posted his copy and what he thought it needed to be...shrug...We shall see...It was kind of fun and I could have done better if I understood the topic better...Five Forces plus complementors analysis. Scary when you have to use a dictionary to read a text book. This is why, when I go back to school, I will NOT be taking business...lol

Ok, I'm outta here..J is out of the tub and I need to check a few things and feed them. I figure my beloved will not be home for me to feed them all together.


PS My Beloved made it home safely!!
February 5, 2007 at 3:57pm
February 5, 2007 at 3:57pm
Feb 5, 2007

The entry where you get to know about me!

I know, you didn’t ask…so I’m going to torture you anyway. You have 2 choices. 1. Continue to read and find out a lot of useless information you didn’t ask for or 2. Stop reading now and go find a blog that has more sustenance or less chickens or is more informative. I hope you will choose the first. If you choose the 2nd, well you’ve probably already left so it doesn’t really matter. LOL

I was born into a family that was a bit “different.” Both of my parents were disabled. My mother, physically so. My father, physically and mentally..sort of. My mom had influenza meningitis at the age of 7. She ran such a high fever it burnt brain cells so she couldn’t walk ( I know there may be a medically more correct terminology-spare me..this is what I was taught growing up..J ) She became a c 5-7 Quadrapelegic. She went to a school called James E. Roberts in Indianapolis, In where she graduated from high school. It’s also where she met my dad. At 19 she had a staph infection in her right hip. They ended up amputating her right leg above the hip. Both times she was supposed to have died. Both times she defied the odds. Neither was it the last time she would do so. But I’ll save that for another entry.

My dad was born with a degenerative disease that ate away the ball and socket of his hip. He had a steel plate in his hip, walked with a major limp and was also born dyslexic. 60 odd years ago, that meant he was treated as if he were retarded. He was born the 3rd of 4 children. He also did some time in the hospital with his hip and such but I don’t know much about all of it. Since he and both of my grandparents are gone, my sister rarely spoke to him before he died and his remaining siblings seem to have forgotten I exist, I’m not likely to know, nor is most of it important. He also overcame much in his life.

I have an older sister who is 6 ½ years older than I am. We have always been very different, both physically and and in how we approach life. She is 5’2’’, skinny, blonde hair and blue eyes. I am 5’5 ½” definitely NOT skinny, brown hair and hazel eyes. She has been focused on her career (she is a chemo nurse) her animals and her friends. She does not have a spouse or children. I am 34, been married for 13 years and have 2 children. I will hopefully be going back to school in the fall, but my children and my family are my priority. I have worked outside the home in daycare, nursing homes, and customer service. I enjoy helping people and being around people.

I went through 12 years of parochial schools. I graduated in the top 20 percent of my high school class. I love to read, I stink at math. I cant’ remember the first time I started trying to write, but remember doing some of it in high school. I once wrote a story about 2 characters…I wish I could find that….what I remember writing most was "Invalid Item

I wrote it the summer between my Jr and senior year of high school at Indiana State University Summer Honors Program. I wanted so badly to study Special education...I still love the field but it is not the direction I intend to pursue when I go back to school.

I love to read. I read very quickly, devouring books when I have the time. It depends on my mood as to what I like. I tend to read and watch movies that have happy endings. I don’t like blood and guts, I don’t wanna see someone’s thoughts on what might happen in the future (as in movies like The Seventh Sign). I like musicals; I like comedies, but am not into what I refer to as stupid humor…not overly into off color jokes, making fun of people …or acting like an idiot. I’m quite picky when it comes to stuff like that.

Even though I went through 12 years of parochial school and church, I didn’t know until after my parents died that I could have an actual relationship with God. It still amazes me today that He truly wants me to know Him, and wants to know me…That He cares enough on a day-to-day basis to look out for me and be there for me. That He plans my entire life, though I’m free to make my choices away from His perfect plan. I’ll preach more another day.

I have 2 children and I baby-sit at home. We have 2 dogs, we refer to them as the Mutley’s. Scamp and Serena are German Shepard mix. They are litter mates, male and female-though both fixed.

I don’t like confrontation but am also extremely loyal…which means sometimes my two worlds collide. I tend to view the world through rosy colored glasses. I know that I’m on the naïve side..but because I know that at..I also know that it may not happen the way I want it to. I’m a dreamer by nature. I love to be hugged. I’m open with my friends..mostly. I tend to hold people off of the really important stuff…though there are a select few.

I started out in an internet chat room in 2001 shortly before my parents died. That group of people..though all a bit on the “different side” and that is putting it mildly, saw me through my father's death in Jan of 2002 and then my mom’s in March of 2002. When things started getting a little hairy and people started taking sides..I joined a parenting group, also on msn. Some of those I met at that time, I still hold dear.

I’m sure there’s tons more..but this is probably more enough for your minds to even have to think about now.
February 5, 2007 at 2:42pm
February 5, 2007 at 2:42pm
Feb 5, 2007

Even though I SAID I would never again write an entry without putting it into Word to do it...I was in a fog when I started and didn't...and just lost the whole darn thing!!! I"ll be back to attemp my entry again...though maybe it's God's way of telling me I"ve talked enough...lol

February 3, 2007 at 11:04pm
February 3, 2007 at 11:04pm
Feb 3, 2007

First let me say...I'm not a member of any clique that I know of...*Rolleyes*

Yes, this is my second entry for the day. Bare with me...I'm in a bit of a...mood...have something on my mind.

I've been here at WDC for just under a month-still a newbie. In that time I've learned alot and enjoyed almost every minute of it. I enjoy reading, I enjoy reviewing(though I'm not so very good at it) I enjoy sharing my writing. I'm nosy and enjoy reading others blogs and comment when I have something to say. I'm staring to make friends..or at least have regulars that I visit and who have rescued me a time or two.

In that time I have seen several comments; whether it be in people's blogs or from comments in a blog...or wherever honestly, because I don't remember where they all came from...of the cliques and the groups and people feeling left out. Now, while I'm starting to make friends and enjoying peoples' blogs and lives, I've not made such good friends that I"m here to defend anyone..and if I were smart I would turn around and walk away. But I have a tendency to speak my mind and open my mouth all at once. None of this is any of my business, nothing was said to me...but it is something I've seen on here more than once. I don't want to step on anyone's toes but ...here goes anyway.

WDC is a writing group. With different people and different tastes. Some people just belong together and make good friends. It's no different than in the real world except we can't see one another (except for the occasional eggy picture) Not everyone is going to bond. Not everyone is going to be interested in one persons writing. I've had some positive reviews, some very helpful reviews, and even a not so helpful review. I take them for what they are. In the time that I've been here, I"ve been given alot. I've been given love, support, friendship. I've been given help. I've been given some very good pointers on writing. I've been made to feel welcome. And I"ve made a few mistakes. I've responded in frustration to a review (my frustration was not with the reviewer but my own inadequecy at trying to do something else on WDC) and then had to apologize..thankfully my apology was accepted quite gracefully and I'm learning not to try to do 2 things at once on here.

I don't know what people's complaints are about. I don't know why they feel shortchanged or that no one likes them..and I"ve been known to be touchy at times myself....but the best way to have a friend is to be one..cliche, yes...write, review, go read blogs...and comment! Understand that people have lives outside of the computer and that if they made it to one blog but not yours..it's probably not a personal judgment...they either ran out of time or had nothing to say! Did you review one of their pieces or are you just expecting them to stop in? This is not rocket science, it's life. It's a relationship. Those take time!

Suck it up, move on. If you want them to be your friend, quit whining about how they won't let you in..and start joining in! If you have a legitimate issue...take to someone who can do something about it!

(now we'll see how much hate mail I get!) That's ok, I have big shoulders...probably bigger than my own mouth....

I'm still grateful for WDC...*Smile*

Now, on a lighter note:

How to Tell the Sex of a Fly

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"Hunting Flies" He responded.
"Oh. Killing any?" She asked.
"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.

Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?"
He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."


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