this is not a story or a poem. this is where i talk about whatever the hell i want.
|this is from any aspect of my life, or others, i feel like talking about. you can read if you wish. you don't have to agree with it. but this is my life, my stories and i would like you to come along for the ride...|
|about yesterday, yuck! must've just been a weak moment.
okay so what to talk about. im trying to find more to talk about than tobi coz lately thats ill ive been doing.
i have football on saturday morning against or local rivals the east coast eagles. although our finals chances are almost gone unless we win more games than we lose for the rest of the season it's going to be a fiery encounter.
last time we played them there was a massive fight which i deny any involvement in haha.
saturday night i should be going to the pub with the football boys for dinner. thats pretty much my weekends plans. sunday is sleeping. "day of rest"
check ya later,
| im in a bit of a depressed mood today. i don't know if it has anything to do with my writing lately but it's taking its toll...
i feel im not good enough for tobi. maybe i really do break up with my girlfriends after two weeks but this time for a different reason. because this time it isnt a question of if i like her, i know i do, but rather if she would be better off without me?
i want her to be happy. i cant remember wanting that for anyone before. all my 17 years and 7 months ive been looking out for number 1. myself.
when i looked at her sleeping on monday i just sat there beside her taking in the way she looked. the way he chest rose and fell with each breath. that's when i knew i loved her and started having thoughts that she deserves so much better than me...
probably wont feel like this tomorro but yeh. thanks for listening...
|it seems all ive done is tlk about tobi lately and yes i will be talking about her again today.
also i have been working on my script for a seven part television series with the working title "good morning, burraford". Coming along swimmingly.
yesterday i hung with tobi. i was tired so i was laying on the bed dozing off and she came and lay next to me. we just snuggled for over an hour, sometimes talking, sometimes kissing, mostly just lying there.
in that time i realised i love her. like full blown, a dozen roses and a box of chocolates love.
but some people decide because their lives are shit they are gonna tell her stuff that isn't true. and even if they believe its true they dont know the facts and it isnt their business!
i explained everything to tobi about what and was not true, preparing for the worst but she believed me and all is good. one of the things that was said was that i break up with ym girlfriends after two weeks which in some cases is true because i dont feel anything for them...well anything more than a mate.
i have no intention of breaking up with tobi because, as the cliche goes, she completes me...
we now have a running joke that if we are asked if we are going out we answer with "yeah for the next four days". always finding the funny side of things, i am.
anyways ill stop wasting your time.
I have been adopted by a mentor in The Angel Army
"The WDC Angel Army"
|why hello fellow writers *yawns*
i just got to work. "another day, another dollar" i believe is the saying.
well it's about 9 hours and 21 minues til i see my girlfriend but, hey, who's counting?
we're going on our first official date tonight. so effing nervous...
i think we're seeing the dark knight. can't wait!
anyways, check ya later,
ps. steph, you havent been on much lately, i hope everything is going alright with you. if it isn't you know im here for you *HUGS*
| i dont really have anything to write about today but ill just ramble to take up some more time i have left at work.
things are going well with tobi. the only problem is everytime i pay her a compliment she says something along the lines of "i doubt it". maybe i should just stop saying it...
we're supposed to be going to the movies on thursday but i think she is coming down with the flu so i dont want her coming out in the cold (its winter here, americans)and getting worse. she reckons she is coming even if she is sick.
ummm what else to talk about...tobi loves my writing =) that made me feel really good when she wanted me to send her new stuff as soon as i write it. now i have to write at least two books lol. one dedicated to "iona smith" (her real name) and one dedicated to "stephanie grace" one of my best friends
i think thats enough rambling for one day.
catch ya later...behave yourselves,
|i just looked at the things ive written in my blog and isnt it funny how we change our minds about things?
a week ago i just wanted to be the single friend that doesnt want a relationship and now that ive met this girl, tobi, im on that roller coaster again.
there was this...moment...last night where everything seemed perfect. ill get to that soon.
so there was a group of us yesterday. meand tobi as well as her friends tessa, cam, matt, ash, and chantelle. matt and ash are complete star wars nerds. we were in starbucks and the each got a spoon and a green straw and made it into a lightsabre and ran around dueling. it was so lame but funny to watch...from a distance. XD
eventually it was time to go. tobi was heading west on a train while i had to go east along with chantelle and the star wars nerds.
on the train chantelle's phone rang and she gave it to me.
it was tobi's ex
so to cut a long story short we exchanged words and i hung up. im not gonna listen to people pay out on someone i like because they screwed up and lost her. all i have to say is "sit on it and rotate". (its my blog i can say what i want...banana hammock)
yeh ive just realised this is a pretty long entry. im almost done =)
now to my favorite part. it doesnt start off so good but it has a good ending.
tobi and i were talking online. she kept apologising over and over about her ex calling me. i kept telling her over and over it was fine.
the time came where i had to go offline so i told her i would call her but she said she was a bit upset and crying and i probably shouldnt call. some of you know that if somethings wrong with someone i care about i don't give up easy. you guessed... i called anyway.
the conversation on the phone lasted about half an hour. thats thirty minutes to you people that never learnt about fractions =P
by the end of it she was laughing and in a happier mood.
that was the moment. when she laughed and i knew that i was the cause of it. it just made me happy.
im pretty much all used up for the day when it comes to blogging but like I said, it's my blog and i can do what i want.
|i hung out today with this girl called tobi.
i spent about four hours with her just walking round and im pretty sure im falling for her. i thought i was on thursday but it might have just been a fluke. but it seems like it isnt.
anyway ill keep you guys posted on how everything pans out =)
|It's about a week since I joined WDC and already addicted. I've met some truly amazing people this past week. they probably know who they are but they'd also like to hear themselves mentioned just the same.
Stephanie Grace the girl for New Joisey. She is probably my best friend on this website. I feel like I can tell her anything and I hope she feels the same. We get along so well and Im gonna go see her one day for sure.
Hal isn't far behind Steph. She really cares bout me lol. The email she sent me today proves it. every email she sent asks if im alright. even though i say yes everytime she keeps asking knowing that im not but just asking until im ready to talk
and of course my mentor on WDC kitty. she has taught me a lot of things in the little time we've talked. she's challenged me and ive tried to meet them. if anyone out there needs a mentor kitty is your girl.
I love you guys so much and if you ever need me im here.
|don't you hate it when you go from being single and enjoying it, to taking a chance with this girl (or guy, depending on your preference). it only lasts three days and is over but you can't seem to move on. you wonder if somehow it might be easier if it had of been a year long relationship.
i got off the train at central station today and amongst the crowd of people that swarmed down the stairs i could smell her.
someone had washed their hair with her shampoo...someone was wearing the perfume she wore...someone was smoking the cigarettes she smoked. and it all comes back.
i'd rather it didn't. i rather be the single friend that never wants a serious relationship. every group in the world has someone like that. i want it to be me again.