%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Tales from real life |
| Well, if they're not true, they oughta be! |
Being MAGA means never having to love your neighbor. - The Gospel of Trump In honor of Charlie Kirk, I just want to say: "Donald Trump is a bumbling, dementia-filled Alzheimer's, corrupt, tyrant who should honestly be put in prison and/or given the death penalty for his crimes against America." This is almost a direct quote of a comment that Charlie made about the president during a July 24, 2023, episode of his podcast, "The Charlie Kirk Show." The only thing I've changed is to update it with the current president's name. As well I should. Objectively, every part of that comment fits the current president better. And Charlie Kirk dedicated his life to the belief that every American has the right to say such things. About the president, or anyone else they dislike. Charlie knew with unshakable certainty that free speech needn't have any connection to truth, justice, or common decency. Trump honored Charlie's memory by standing up in front of the cameras and declaring that he's not as good a man as Charlie Kirk. Trump boasted of being spiteful and vindictive. He took pains to make it clear that he's not as forgiving as Charlie and certainly not as Christian. The MAGA crowd cheered this revelation and gave him a standing ovation. So, keep in mind that if you consider Charlie Kirk a hero, Donald Trump falls far short of Charlie's example. And if you consider Charlie a con artist who perverted Christian teaching and enriched himself by selling hate? Well, Trump is far worse. And Donald Trump agrees with me. |
You can vote a dictator in but you can't vote him out. - The Gospel of Trump Fucked in the A.S.S.R. (to the tune of Back in the U.S.S.R.) Voted for dictatorship, dropped to our knees Never ever voting again Gotta say that we don't miss our free speech Man, it feels great to pretend We're fucked in the A.S.S.R. Can't even say how fucked up we are, boys Fucked in the A.S.S.R. Didn't see his socialism headed this way Blinked and our democracy's gone Absolute corruption's gonna rule the day Gotta hand it all to The Don We're fucked in the A.S.S.R. Can't even say how fucked up we are, boys Fucked in the A.S. Fucked in the A.S. Fucked in the A.S.S.R. Resist and Noem's gonna kick you out Deport your sad behind And that Bondi girl just says shut your mouth Ain't no one gonna speak their mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind We're fucked in the A.S.S.R. Can't even say how fucked up we are, boys Fucked in the A.S.S.R. Resist and Noem's gonna take you out Gonna ICE your sad behind And the FCC makes you shut your mouth You ain't gonna speak your mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind Show the stars and bars of the confederate south Segregate your children's school And let me hear those long guns ringing out Shooting first is MAGA's golden rule We're fucked in the A.S.S.R. Can't even say how fucked up we are, boys Fucked in the A.S.S.R. Author's Note ▼ |
| Reposted from Real Fake News: Trump Crime Family Moves Against Chicago Mob by staff reporter Rob N. Steele “Ya got a nice little hellhole out there,” sneered Consiglieri Pam Bondi while putting the Chicago mob bosses on notice. “It'd be a real shame if somethin' nasty was to happen to it. And youse mugs better give that a real good think. Cuz the nastiest SOB on the planet is comin' fer yez. There's only room for one Don in this country an' he ain't just a convicted felon and confirmed rapist. He's a lot worse than that, believe me!” “Protection is a DC racket,” explained Capo Kristi Noem. "And the Don don't like guys tryna stick their nose in his business. I ain't sayin' Trump is into the sex trafficking an' I sure ain't sayin' that's why Epstein hadda go, but a word to the wise guys, right? The Don's interests come first, an' we got the guns to back it up. I'll personally ICE anybody who doesn't get with the program. An' all the other so-called bosses better start payin' their taxes to the Don or their cities are gonna be next." “An' it ain't just protection," smirked Underboss J. D. Vance. "Tariffs are a beautiful thing. Nobody does business on the Don's turf without he gets a taste. An' all a them MAGA suckers and losers don't got a clue. They just keep on borrowin' an' buyin' stuff while the banks kick back half the profits to the Don. And callin' it a loan write-off, that's yer criminal genius right there! And that Big Bunco bill is gonna be the biggest, most beautiful bust-out of all time. An' anybody who don't like it is gonna wake up in Uganda without a passport!" |
You've probably heard of the five W's and one H? They are who, what, when, where, how, and why. These are the essential questions of journalism and also the existential questions of life. Only four of them have answers that I find at all satisfactory. I'll start with who. It's the easiest question because the answer is simply us. Descartes famously said, "I think therefore I am." The big questions only matter, or even exist, because we are here to think about them and ask them (if you don't think, then you may as well stop reading now). I agree with Descartes that who is self-evident (so to speak). What is similar to who, but the perspective is turned outward rather than inward. In a way, the who is merely a subset of the what and the what is the observable universe of the who. What simply is. Our senses, and the scientific instruments that extend our senses, provide a measure of what, but they don't actually explain anything. All we can do with what is observe, accept, and describe. And the processes of observation and description make up a large portion of scientific endeavor. When is a moving target. It seems to slip away just as we think we've found it. Time seems to be a fundamental component of the observable what. Einstein developed elegant equations that describe how the passage of time is intertwined with mass and velocity. The mechanism may be unexplained, but the effect is clear. Every experimental test of Einstein's theories has confirmed the fundamental nature of time. So much so that our what is referred to as a space-time continuum. Perhaps more telling, we don't even think to question the ubiquity of time. "What time is it?" is the only question that virtually all of humanity agrees on. There are no competing belief systems that champion different values for the length of a second or the number of hours in a day (could this faith in time become the basis of a universal religion?). We're constantly aware of time, but that awareness isn't considered a seventh sense. Time is inescapable. It's part of everything we observe, everything we think, and everything we do. So, I've decided to simply accept that when is always now (see my poem Conscripted  ).Where is another subset of what, and like who, it's pretty much self-evident: Everybody has to be somewhere and if you're not where you're at, then you're nowhere. - ? It seems obvious to me that I am where I'm at. I sincerely hope that you are where you're at. And no matter where we go, we can look around and say, “I’m here because I am.” So, I will simply accept that where, in general, is the here of the who in the what. I lose the thread at how. All that we observe has a beginning and an end. Sunrise and sunset mark each day. Birth and death delimit each life. Empires rise and fall. Mountains are lifted up and wear away. But what came first? Aristotle wrote about the prime mover. He observed the inexorable forward march of cause and effect and then reasoned that all of existence could be traced backward in time to reveal a prime mover unmoved by any other mover. And he, she, or that would be the first cause of all the effects that culminate in the here and now of our universe. Aristotle describes the unmoved mover as being perfectly beautiful, indivisible, and contemplating only the perfect contemplation: self-contemplation. - Wikipedia But Aristotle stopped at this navel-gazing idea of God and didn't provide any further speculation on how the prime mover came to be. Aristotle just kicked the can down the road and congratulated himself on an elegant half explanation. Science has arrived at a similar point with the big-bang theory. Stephen Hawking said that information can’t survive a trip through a singularity, so it’s impossible to know what preceded our universe. In addition, he said that time began with the beginning of the universe. So, the very concept of before doesn’t apply. Our reality begins with the big bang and that’s all we know or can know. Hawking's big bang is the equivalent of Aristotle's prime mover. Again, it's a half answer that leaves me doubly unsatisfied with how. Why is the crux of the mystery. No one has ever provided me with a satisfactory explanation of why. There are far too many self-serving politicians, televangicals, and con artists who have an answer to why. Their why always seems to involve me sending them money. And there are too few authentic spiritual guides who offer a more genuine response. And even the best spiritual guides eventually fall back on faith because they can't explain why. Either way, it doesn't seem logical that Aristotle's self-contemplating perfect God would need humanity in general, let alone me in particular. And what's the point of all the beginnings and endings of cause and effect if God is eternal? The only answer I've come up with for the question of why is that I have no other choice. Reality is the only game in town. I have to keep going even though I doubt I'll ever find out why. Well-meaning folks tell me, "Everything happens for a reason." And they're at least half right, everything happens. But I'm not so sure that there's a definitive reason. There may not even be a unique prime mover. At the quantum level, reality seems to be governed by probabilistic (random?) processes. Einstein disliked Heisenberg's uncertainty principle. He insisted that, "God does not play dice with the universe." But the uncertainty of reality at the quantum level has been verified experimentally. It isn't a clockwork mechanism of cause and effect. The dice come up with different numbers for every roll. And we still don't know why. As for me, I pinball between the despair of agnosticism and the desperation of faith. Planning and striving help to pass the time, but then God hits the flipper again and I'm off on another random tangent. The lights flash, the bells chime and the bumpers clack, but there's never any sense of completion. Am I beating the game or just getting beat up? I don't even know if I'm scoring any points. I write poetry, in part, to deal with feelings that I'm unable or unwilling to approach head-on. My poem Observational Bias sums up much of what I've tried to express in this post. Wouldn't it be a wonderful (and horrible) cosmic joke if my 'why' is merely to annoy you with mediocre poetry? |
On 17 March 2023, following an investigation of war crimes, crimes against humanity and genocide, the International Criminal Court (ICC) issued arrest warrants for Vladimir Putin, the president of Russia, and Maria Lvova-Belova, Russian commissioner for children's rights, alleging responsibility for the war crime of unlawful deportation and transfer of children during the Russo-Ukrainian War. The war in Ukraine could have been resolved over the weekend in Alaska. Donald Trump could have been an international hero today. Vladimir Putin could have been arrested and turned over to the ICC. But Trump Always Chickens Out. Instead, he capitulated to a despot charged with war crimes and called for Ukraine to surrender. He implied that it would be necessary for NATO to recognize a Russian victory in order for Trump to achieve his ultimate goal of being awarded a Nobel Peace Prize. The risk to Trump would have been low. The U.S. wouldn't even have had to participate in prosecuting the case. Simply turn Putin over to the ICC and let them deal with the fallout. And serving up Putin as scapegoat would have provided a plausible path for Russia to disengage with at least a semblance of dignity. The war has little support among the general public, and it will take years for the Russian economy to recover. Those in line to inherit Putin's power and wealth wouldn't expend much effort to get him back. Ronald Reagan is an American hero, "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall!" Deservedly or not, he took credit for the fall of the Soviet Empire. Vladimir Putin seeks to resurrect the USSR. Trump could have put the final nail in that coffin. Instead, he allowed a fellow criminal to elude apprehension. Maybe there is honor among thieves. There are rumors that U.S aides left the summit with white-faced expressions of shock and dismay. We can only speculate as to why. Did Putin call in his favor for rigging the 2024 election? Did Trump entertain an offer of a multibillion-dollar personal bribe? Could Putin have offered him the position of president for life in the new American SSR? Are we destined to become part of a big, beautiful soviet empire? Today, Trump is hinting that Ukraine be partitioned similar to post-WWII Germany. Russia will occupy the eastern half, and the U.S. will occupy the west, "Mr. Putin, rebuild that wall!" If sacrificing the Ukrainian people to his personal ambition doesn't earn Trump a peace prize, then there must be something right with the world. |
| Here's a little something from the archives. It seems even more relevant today. I’m a Little Despot I’m a little despot; yes it’s true. You kiss my rear end, and I'll bully you. When I get all steamed up, I run my mouth, praise me now or watch me pout. I’m a shameless liar, big and stout, caught up in collusion there’s no doubt. When they get to know me, people shout: dump the chump, let’s vote him out! Author's note: ▼ |
It's not a lie if stupid people believe it. - The Gospel of Trump I think it's sweet of Big Benny to nominate Lil Donny for a prize. It's not like Donny is ever going to win a prize for real! And besides, the Nobel awards have been limited to hard-working overachievers for far too long. It's time that the morons, incompetents, and moral degenerates get a chance. Who do those intelligent, caring, and talented people think they are? Better than the rest of us? Are hard work and merit what winning a prize is all about? Not in today's America! DEI under the MAGA regime stands for Didn't Earn It. Their loyalty-based DEI program eliminates roadblocks that have held trustworthy Americans back for too long. Things like intelligence, ethics, and achievement are no longer required. MAGA has lowered the bar so that even the least qualified toady can be awarded a prestigious position that they haven't earned. Just like Lil Donny! So, have a bit of sympathy for the kid whose mom packs him off to military school because he's such a little shit. Show some consideration for a guy whose grades are so bad that he has to take out a legal injunction to prevent them from becoming public. At the very least, you could pity the small-handed man who never had a woman who didn't charge him for enjoying her company. At some level, it must feel pathetic when you have to build an entire luxury golf resort just to award yourself a trophy. And it's really sad when you have to throw your own birthday party. Doubly sad when the guests show up only because their commanding officer orders them to be there. It's not easy having a D-minus intellect in a competitive world. It totally isn't fair that no one gives out prizes for greatest liar or biggest cheat. There's just no appreciation for a would-be dictator who bullies the weak and inspires America to be the worst version of itself. What's a convicted felon and confirmed rapist have to do to gain a little respect? And having a bunch of losers fawn over you at cabinet meetings isn't all that satisfying when they're on your payroll. That's why it's so important that Donny finally gets a really real prize. And we won't call it a participation trophy or dismiss it as DEI. No, we'll hire the biggest, bestest, most loyal crowd in recorded history! And they'll all cheer like they really mean it. Or else. |
This post, like the topic of the trinket below, is slightly out of alignment with the summer solstice. But better late than never! My wife and I drove from Seattle to Portland in 2006 to attend a wedding. We'd done the drive on the I5 freeway enough to become boring, so I suggested going the 'long way around' on the way back. This meant driving east along the scenic Columbia River Gorge, turning north on highway 97 toward Yakima and Ellensburg, then returning to Seattle via I90. I convinced my wife that it was a reasonable day trip and off we went early in the morning. The Gorge is well worth the time, with numerous waterfalls and beautiful views of the river. But I also had an ulterior motive. I'd read about a full-scale replica of the Stonehenge monument that had been built on a bluff above the river by an eccentric railroad tycoon. That was what I really wanted to see. We stopped to admire the 600-foot drop at Multnomah Falls and also at several other scenic viewpoints along the river. At one spot we watched kite surfers 'catching air' in the strong winds that blow along the Gorge. I'd intended to eat lunch somewhere near the Stonehenge monument, but the remote area has no services worth mentioning. We spent some time admiring the incongruous sight of the stones standing literally in the middle of nowhere and then visited the Maryhill Museum a couple of miles away. By midafternoon, out tummies were rumbling, and we pressed on to find something to eat. It was almost an hour before we finally found a diner in Toppenish. I've rarely seen such empty country. But it did match well with the feeling in our stomachs. By the time we'd eaten, it was almost dusk, and we were still three hours away from home. It was a long, quiet ride in the dark with my exhausted and annoyed wife. Today, it's just another funny story about Dad holding up his thumb and index finger saying, "It's only this far on the map." But at the time, I was in the doghouse for a couple of days until Deb forgave me. Here's a trinket to celebrate the summer solstice:   |
No Kings! We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. - American Declaration of Independence |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
