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I began writing because I had a story that demanded to be written. I now write because I love to do it. I love the whole process: development, writing, editing, improving. My stories tend to be overly ambitious, but that's ok because they challenge me, and who doesn't love a challenge?
I think you're in the same boat, you just haven't realised it yet. Write for yourself, get the story written, and only then worry about stuff like structure, character arcs, theme, editing out the bits that don't need to be there etc. Let experience guide you, but you need to gain experience first, so don't procrastinate - write!