Jared was hunched over his desk, deep in the trenches of his algebra homework, when he felt it—a strange, tingling sensation creeping up his legs. He froze, pencil mid-air. “Oh no,” he muttered. “Not again.”
Within seconds, his quads began to inflate like balloons at a carnival. They grew and grew until they reached a staggering 24 inches, rivaling the legendary Tom Platz himself. Jared’s legs now looked like they belonged to a professional bodybuilder—or maybe a mutant kangaroo.
“DREW!” Jared yelled, wobbling to his feet. He stumbled to the mirror, his reflection confirming the absurdity of his new physique. “What did you do to me this time?!”
From somewhere outside, Drew’s voice rang out, smug and unapologetic. “Relax, bro! I just thought you could use some *serious* quads. You’re welcome!”
Jared glared at the ceiling, as if Drew’s disembodied voice was hiding up there. “Undo it! I look like I’ve been skipping upper body day for my entire life!”
But before Jared could argue further, his legs suddenly moved on their own. One hop. Two hops. Three hops. Jared shot straight up, his head narrowly missing the ceiling fan. “DREW!” he yelled, flailing mid-air before landing with a thud.
Drew’s laughter echoed through the room. “Dude, you’ve got an *insane* vertical leap now! You’re basically a soccer prodigy waiting to happen.”
Jared groaned, rubbing his head. “I don’t even *play* soccer right now! Soccer season is over! And I don’t need quads that could crush watermelons!”
“Fine, fine,” Drew said, still chuckling. “But admit it—you felt pretty cool for a second.”
Jared crossed his arms, his quads still comically oversized. “I’ll admit it when you admit you’re the worst friend ever.”
“Deal,” Drew replied, and with a snap of his fingers (or whatever it was Drew did), Jared’s legs returned to their normal, non-terrifying size. Jared sighed in relief, sinking back into his chair.
“By the way,” Drew added, his voice fading as if he was walking away, “you might want to check your reflection again.”
Jared turned to the mirror, only to see a huge bulge in his shorts. Drew had increased the size of his balls! “DREW!” he bellowed, as Drew’s laughter echoed into the distance.
And that’s how Jared learned to never leave Drew unsupervised with his mysterious powers!
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