Samus sat on her beach chair, listening to the sounds of the ocean. It almost seemed unreal – how much of her life was spent on some godforsaken assignment on some inhospitable planet, working – or worse, fighting for her life? Admittedly things had been considerably less stressful during her Smash Brothers time, but it was still work. She honestly wasn’t even sure how to handle herself without some job to do – it had been so long since she’d had a chance to relax in earnest. Maybe even nearly as long ago as the last time she’d had a smoothie.
Samus looked down at the drink in her hand. Maybe it was weird to be so invested in this, but Samus had always been a weird one. She’d been looking forward to it the whole way over, and as soon as they had gotten everything settled she’d gone looking for a place that sold them. Others had pointed out that she could have gotten one at the airport – on either end – but they didn’t understand. It had to be just right.
The first time she’d ever had the magical crushed-ice beverage was the summer after her first year at the academy (well, it had been summer on that planet, anyway). That had been such a wonderful, innocent time, before life had decided to try and beat as much happiness out of her as it could. She’d had friends then. Well, OK, that wasn’t really fair to the other Smashers, but that was different. She liked all her fellow Nintendo characters well enough (except for Fox – screw Fox), but she’d always felt like an outsider among them. That summer had been a time when she’d really belonged somewhere. That summer had been a lot of things to her, actually, which is why the smoothie was so important. It represented those days; a last link to a time when she’d been happiest. One sip would bring all that back again, she was certain. Not that she’d told anyone else any of this, of course. As far as they knew, she just really wanted a smoothie.
And now she had one, in her hand, its straw beckoning her lips like a lover’s kiss (ooh, that was a good one. She should write that down). She tried to recall the taste in her mind, but it was just a faded memory now. A faded memory of a fruity sensation. Samus knew that she’d waited too long already. She brought it up to her face –
“PIKAAAAA!”
Samus whipped around to see the small yellow pokemon barreling toward her with a look of panic she’d rarely seen outside of battle. Immediately she tensed up, instincts preparing her for a fight. Something had spooked Pikachu badly, it seemed, and that didn’t bode well for her either. Samus was wondering just what sort of terrible monster might be about to make an appearance when she noticed something else: flames were coming out of Pikachu’s mouth. What on Earth… Perhaps that was the reason for Pikachu’s distress, instead. Something about it did seem familiar… The word ‘curry’ had just crept into her mind when Pikachu was on her. Samus quickly dodged, but not quite quick enough: with a look of desperate, crazed desire, Pikachu snatched the smoothie from her hand. Samus felt the bottom of her stomach fall out as the horrible creature ripped the lid from her precious, cool drink and drained the cup in what seemed to be one foul gulp. For a second, he looked as sick as she felt. Then his cheeks ballooned and he let out a tremendous belch (Samus didn’t even know Pikachus could burp).
“AAAUUGHHH! You @#$&*, &^*#’#%’’ ^&^@#%@#@ little RAT!” she heard herself say. But it was too late. Pikachu was on his back, groaning, his face an unhealthy color as steam rose from his mouth. Already it was hard to stay mad at the little guy; he really looked sick. Doubtless it had something to do with whatever had lit that fire in his mouth.
“…Damn it,” Samus muttered to herself. Maybe she couldn’t stay mad at Pikachu, but damned if she couldn’t be mad in general. She had lost her smoothie, the thing she’d been looking forward to for hours, and now she’d have to go all the way back to that little shop and get another one. Well, no sense in waiting, then. After making sure Pikachu was at least not dying, Samus headed back towards the shop where she’d bought her frozen drink (but not before picking up the empty cup, lid, and straw and throwing them all away. Remember, kids: Sakurai says DON’T LITTER). Little did she know what awaited her on her journey…
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