Lincoln awoke with a start. His stomach grumbled. Checking the clock, he heaved a sigh that it was already lunch time. “It’s not easy being me sometimes. Having so many people packed in one space tends to eat up your time one way or another. That becomes pretty literal when your house is full of predators,” he deadpanned to his audience as he slipped into his clothes from earlier. “I don’t even have time to get properly cleaned if I want to get to the good leftovers in time.”
After spraying on enough deodorizer to render a dog nose blind, Lincoln headed out to what was a pretty standard level of chaos and loudness. Good. If everyone was still doing their own things, that increased his odds of making it to the kitchen unmolested… Probably a poor choice of words.
“Excushe me, elder male shibling. Might I borrow you for a moment?” Lisa asked, stepping out of her room in a hazmat suit. It was distressing just how numb Lincoln was to such a sight by now.
“Whatever it is, can it wait? I’d really like to get to the fridge before-”
“Shomeone shtealesh your chicken nuggetsh.” Face expressionless, Lisa produced a plate with Lincoln’s coveted breaded treats, all sizzling hot. “All cooked to perfection, thanksh to my homemade oven.” There came a sound of something heavy bouncing around behind the genius, followed by a crash, which was very distinct from a standard explosion. Still looking unfazed, Lisa closed the door behind her. “Care to try one?”
Lincoln frowned. For the umpteenth time today, a sister had backed him into a corner. “I might not be Lola, but if this is a trick to experiment on me, I’m definitely telling mom.”
“Don’t be paranoid.” The crashing from Lisa’s room resumed, only now there was a rhythm, almost like something was dancing. “The only experiment here ish the effectivenessh of my oven. By all meansh. Enjoy.” She pushed the plate out into his hands. As Lincoln shrugged and popped a bite into his mouth, Lisa muttered, “Beshidesh, that rule only appliesh to chemicalsh and drugsh.”
“Say what now?” Lincoln asked mid chew.
“I shaid nothing.”
“Hello mah baby. Hello mah honey. Hello mah ragtime gaaal!” sang something from Lisa’s room, making her look very nervous.
Lincoln continue to chew, now especially mindful of what might be in his mouth. It was actually pretty good. “So long as I don’t see it and it doesn’t affect me, I’ve got nothing to tattle about.”
“Your dishcretion ish mosht appreciated.” Lisa nodded. “And the nuggetsh?”
Lincoln swallowed. “Better than usual, actually.” Anticipating her next question, he began patting himself down and taking a few test steps. “No adverse side effects, yet,” he said the last word in warning before taking another bite. “Oh, that reminds me. Is Clyde out of Leni yet?”
“Not yet. Our elder shishter ish enjoying moving him through her digeshtive tract,” Lisa said as she pulled out a notebook to jot down her observations.
Lincoln took another bite. “Still good. Also, have you had time to read the book we got you?”
Lisa nodded. “The art ish nicely detailed, the protagonisht ish above average by human shtandardsh,” high praise from her, “and there are jusht enough cluesh for a keen eyed obsherver to put the piecesh together. I’ve yet to figure out any myshteriesh before the detective, to the author’sh credit, but I don’t feel cheated, like the cashe wash sholved with an assh pull. Overall, very shatishfactory. And you? How ish the chicken?” She gave nothing away as a purple tentacle sprouted from Lincoln’s head, only to fall off and shrivel up behind him. He was none the wiser.
“Not bad.” Lincoln swallowed and popped in another bite. “I probably don’t want to know what you did to these things, but they’re great. I think you might have another patent in the works.”
“Excellent.” Lisa waited for him to finish eating, discretely shuffling any other growths off to the side before Lincoln could notice. When he was done, she took back the plate. “Your cooperation, ash alwaysh, ish appreciated.” Then she sniffed. “Although I recommend that you abshcond to the shower, posht hashte. You know what’sh likely to happen once theshe animalsh shmell you.”
“Yeah. About that.” Lincoln rubbed the back of his head. “You think you could-”
“Join you on the journey to the bathroom in the hopesh of deterring our shavage shiblingsh from being triggered by your aroma and acting ash though in heat?” Lisa said all in one breath. “Certainly.”
They went back to their respective rooms to grab a change of clothes, with Lisa definitely not engaging in an epic battle against the latest monstrosity birthed by her experiments. They made it to the bathroom and, much to their surprise, had it all to themselves. The pair stripped and hopped in the tub.
“Lisa’s experiments might be dangerous, but without her tools, she’s one of the safest sisters to be around,” Lincoln said. Although in this case, it might just be his inner monologue being heard by the audience, as Lisa gave no indication that she heard anything. She just made a sound of contentment as he kneaded shampoo into her scalp. “Lisa’s young enough that her sex drive is effectively zero. She’ll lick people just for the taste, rather than any other kind of gratification. Not to mention that she’s not even old enough to digest anyone yet. She can only get Lily down, and only after a lot of struggling. It can be hard for a young pred, always being told they had to wait until they’re ready. Fortunately for Lisa, her hobbies keep her pretty busy. Though I can tell she’s envious of our other sisters. That’s something the two of us have in common. Even so, I’m almost as eager as she is for the day when she can finally digest someone, thus becoming a full predator.”
“Could you wash my back next? I can never sheem to reach,” requested the squinting genius.
“No problem.” Lincoln grabbed the rag and scrubbed firmly across his second youngest sister’s skin. As one of his sisters, he was still pretty familiar with her body. No curves, other than some lingering baby fat, a flat butt, flatter chest, and super short. She was young enough to still be considered extra sweet, at least in what Lincoln understood of predator preferences. However, if given the choice, their sisters were still more likely to swallow him than her. Preferential treatment really wasn’t all that great, to be honest, but Lincoln endured. He still enjoyed these quieter moments where he and his sister could just wash each other’s backs without any lewd overtones.
“Say, with all the stuff you’re always building, you think you could make something like a super deodorizer?”
“For what purposhe?”
“Well, so that the next time I’m left in a puddle of sweat and sex juices in my room, I don’t have to brave no-man’s land just to get the stink off.”
“Hmm. A meansh of attaining inshtant hygiene for prey looking to avoid opportunishtic predatorsh.” Still squinting, Lisa turned a deadpan stare back at her brother. “You do realize I have a biash in favor of you washing my hair, right?”
“Hey, I’m always glad to lend a hand, but that’s exactly the problem. No offense, but you guys can be awfully needy sometimes. I’m not asking for a break, just a way to walk down the hall with some peace of mind.”
Lisa nodded. “I shupposhe ‘needy’ ish a fair asshesshment for a wily predator, and you do do a lot for ush. Very well,” she conceded. “I’ll shee what I can do.”
Grinning, Lincoln grabbed Lisa from behind and pulled her naked body to his in a constrictive embrace. “Thanks a lot, Lisa. You don’t know what this means to me.”
“I may have an inkling.” Lincoln’s flaccid cock was rubbing against her flat buttocks. And while she was still too young to fully appreciate the sensation, that didn’t stop a light blush from reddening her cheeks.
The pair dried one another off, got dressed, and amicably parted ways. Lisa had not only gotten some valuable data from her brother, but also the shared shower was an effective means of unwinding after a long day of twisting the natural order to her sick and depraved whims. Speaking of which, as she entered her and Lily’s room, it seemed that the shriveled tentacles weren’t so shriveled anymore. “Shtay back you fiendsh! I have a flamethrower and I know how to ushe it!”
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