"Oh no you don't. Transformation is expensive and I don't want to have to worry about accidentally hurting you."
"I realize there is a risk but Robbie can't know I'm his dad or I won't be able to find out what he's doing but there are things I can do to reduce the risk. I can make myself highly durable. I can also make sure there is a backup to restore me to human after a while. I'm going to do some research before I do this anyway and I'm going to need your help. So together we can make sure this doesn't end up costing us too much."
--------------------------
Properly certified transformation is expensive but there are discount or second hand transformation options. You look at several options. Many of them are permanent transformations where you wouldn't be able to change back. Others use machines that are defective. But then at a thrift store, you find something.
Outside the thrift store in the area where they receive donations, there is a transformation machine that is brand new. You talk with the store and find that the manager has the strange idea that people might actually donate themselves. Someone wants to be a shirt, all he has to do is step in the machine and change himself into a shirt and the thrift store has a brand new shirt to sell. You ask if the transformation is reversible.
"Yes, the machine happens to store the necessary data to reconstruct the human. It creates a data file that we would throw away."
You continue talking until you work out a deal. He will let you do what you want but it will cost you of course. How it will work is that you hop in the machine and change yourself into a shirt. You will be placed on the normal clothing racks so your wife can buy you. Instead of throwing away your data file, it will also be made available for your wife to buy. Then when it's time to change you back, it will cost a small fee. Still, it is far less expensive than a properly certified place. The whole ordeal would only be about the cost of three shirts.
You go tell your wife. The two of you are now ready. You stand next to the transformation machine wearing clothes you wish to donate as the thrift store manager instructed.
"Now baby doll, make me a shirt that Robbie would wear. You know what he wears better than I would.
You crawl inside. It's a tight fit and when the door closes you are in complete darkness. The walls are completely metal. You did see a few small holes before you got in but they apparently do not let any light in.
"Can you hear me in there?"
"Yea, I hear you just fine. You don't have to be so loud."
"Alright, it's asking for what kind of clothing you want. You could have set this yourself before you went in."
"I don't know what Robbie likes."
"How about a plain white t-shirt?"
"No, you idiot. Robbie wouldn't wear a plain white t-shirt. Make me a shirt with the logo of his favorite band on it or something else Robbie would wear often."
She pauses, "Okay, something Robbie would wear often." She thinks about how your relationship to her has been strained for a while, how you order her around and take her for granted. Should she teach you a lesson?
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