\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED ITEMS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4265928
Review #4265928
Viewing a review of:
Sprocket Open in new Window. [E]
A steampunk tinker helps her employer win the big race--300 words
by Schnujo's Doing Homework Author Icon
Review of Sprocket  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
my review sig

"SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP" Open in new Window.
Hello there, Schnujo's Doing Homework
This is a Simply Positive Review. *Hotair*


*Tophat* I loved this! I remember you messaging me and telling me you were entering a flash fiction contest and the prompt was Steampunk. I found this item in your port and figured it may be the one we were talking about.

*UmbrellaY* You had a couple loveable characters, the smart and meticulous personal assistant, who was also employed as a steampunk tinker for her boss, to help him win the big race, and the forgetful genius boss, who needed his tinker more as a daily assistant to keep him on track. She kept the sprockets tuned for his airship, or so it would seem . *Wink*

Observations

"but in time she came to understand that it was the price of his genius[,] and that, she admired more than anything."
Needed a comma before "and" because it separates the next clause from running into it. (genius and that) Thus: "genius, and that, she admired." I think I know this because I have been imprisoned with the comma queen, Winnie Kay in the "Lucky Bones Game." *Laugh*

*BowGr* Anyway, this was not bad for a Steampunk quickie, with some prompt words needing to be woven in, also. You made them fit nicely!


Well done! *Hotair2*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4265928