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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4515140
Review #4515140
Viewing a review of:
ruwth is writing...  [18+]
I will be adding stories, poems & reflections as the year marches on. Take a gander today!
by ruwth
         Review for entry/chapter: "~ Where The Heck Is My Neck? ~
Review by 🌑 Darleen
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello ruwth ,

I just read your short story "~ Where The Heck Is My Neck? ~, which I found when in the "I Write in 2019 forum and wanted to share my personal thoughts with you.

Disclaimer: Please remember that the following suggestions are based off of my own opinion and personal interpretation of your work. Feel free to take and/or toss out any of my suggestions.

*Star**Moon**Star* Overall Impressions: *Star**Moon**Star*


This piece was written as part of the contest "The Dialogue 500 which requires only dialogue and no speech tags which presents a difficult task especially when there are more than two people involved.

I did find myself a bit confused at times at exactly who was talking because there were at least 4 characters involved, I think, but I got the basic gist of the story based on "Turkey Talk" prompt, which was Mom has always eaten the turkey neck and someone was not informed and tossed all her turkey neck and giblets causing a giant "oops" and awkward situation.

For a non-fiction piece, I find it surprising with all of the people involved, that no one informed the cook of this long-term obviously important tradition.

There is one typo towards the end:

I didn't know. How was I supposed to know your mom would actually EAT thr neck?




*Star**Moon**Star* Additional Comments: *Star**Moon**Star*


Good luck in the contest!

I enjoyed reading your work and hope my review was helpful and encouraging!

*Star**Moon**Star*




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4515140