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Review #4836204
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Review by Tiggy Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: | (4.5)
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*PenB* First Impressions:

It's only a little bit too early for Halloween, and how could you possibly resist that prompt? This was the perfect story for it, and hiding the unholy pumpkin where no one could find it should have done the trick. Unfortunately for Ebbs, it didn't quite work out the way he had planned. You didn't say what went wrong - it is left to the readers' imagination what happened during his final moments. I feel like I missed something though. If the plan didn't work, why was the horseman also gone?


*PenG* Suggestions:

The story was well written and I only noticed one error:

The pumpkin has a horrible face and it flamed with unholy light by itself.
The rest of the tale was written in past tense, but here you switched to present tense, "has".


*PenP* Final Thoughts:

I felt for Samuel when he described how the pumpkin landed on his head. Apart from the fact that it would probably hurt, I can't begin to imagine how freaked out he must have been. No wonder he had to run and tell someone!

I thought this was a good story, perhaps a little vague at the end but like I said, that might be me missing something. It was very intriguing trying to figure it out, anyway!




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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 09/19/2025 @ 2:30pm EDT
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