Lolita and The Lake Viking! Editor: 𝓦𝓮𝓫W𝓲𝓽𝓬𝓱 
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Having fun fishing on the community lake.  |
 Gone Fishin'
"Hey WebWitch! Was that WebLock on the lake? I saw him standing up on the paddle boat and fishing. I'm afraid he might fall in!"
Then, at the pool ..."Did we see WebLock standing up on the paddle boat? How does he keep his balance?"
Then came BINGO night as one friend or neighbor stopped by the TV room to ask the same question. 
The answer is YES! Yes, it's WebLock. I don't know. Sticky foot pads I guess! 
WebLock has been enjoying braving the rippling waters of the small lake in our community. It appears he has found a way to fly-fish while standing and balancing on the peddle boat that I dubbed Lolita. It's become a neighborhood watch lately. It also has become great entertainment for neighbors watching from their decks with drinks and popcorn, taking bets on when he would fall in.
After a couple weeks everyone just accepted that WebLock had the balance to both stand and fish at the same time while floating along the lake.
 Lolita:
She can be an adventurous little boat. One day at the pool, a couple people on the Bocce court yelled out to me wondering if WL fell into the lake because the boat was just drifting along with no "pilot" in control. I looked out toward the other end of the lake and saw her adrift. WL was not in the boat because he was getting the mail. When he returned I told him Lolita somehow untethered herself and went for a ride. Now began the chase! He ran down that side of the lake and prepared to get wet.
In the meantime, I went back home and started preparations for dinner. I didn't know what to expect upon his return. About a half hour later I see the return of Lolita with WL again at the controls of her peddles!
It was a brave mission, indeed! I did wonder why his clothes were dry, though.
"WebWitch, the boat managed to come ashore down the far end so I didn't have to get into the water."
"Well, be sure to tie her up tight, this time."
"It was tight--I swear! Someone must have been playing a joke and cut the line. They are always cheering and holding up their drinks whenever I pass by."
"Yeah, like they'd want to throw a monkey wrench into the sight that has given them much entertainment the past few weeks! I don't think so."
Anyway, Lolita got the extra tying and knotting around its little docking area. It would take a machete to cut it away! That drama was over, at least.
 Sleep With the Fishes!
Hey, I love the Godfather series as much as the next person, but this time it's for real!
WL prepared to take Lolita out for another fishing run. Within a few minutes he returned to the house with a picture on his camera. There was a dead fish lying down near the pedals! 
 The Godfather tune played in my head. Suddenly, the little lake turned into Lake Tahoe! I wondered what the dead fish meant. Was someone really angry about WebLock's lake travels past their homes? Did they want to send a message?
Does WL innocently head out to fish each day repeating this line in his head?... "Every time I put the line in the water I said a Hail Mary and every time I said a Hail Mary I caught a fish."
I still wondered... Who would do that?
Back at the Pool:
I'm watching everyone around us. Is there a spark of guilt or glint of mischievousness--or worse, the "if looks can kill" look? Everyone was a suspect at that time. 
Suddenly, someone at the pool broke my Godfather fantasies.
"WebWitch, I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it from my deck, myself!"
"What are you talking about?" I inquired.
"Yesterday, an osprey was flying overhead with a good size fish it had just caught. Suddenly, those mockingbirds started attacking it in flight because it was too close to their nesting area. The osprey tried fighting them off while hanging on to its prize meal. The struggle got to be too much and the osprey let go of the fish. I'll be darned if she didn't drop that fish right into your peddle boat!"
...  
Mystery solved!
And that is the ultimate "One that got away" ending to this fishy tale!
P.S.
There was a knock on the door. The neighbor across the lake said our boat got away and is floating by the culvert. Web-Lock and I looked at each other, ran to the window -- and Lolita was still tethered.
Imagine that!!!
Until next time--laugh hard, laugh often!
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Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter!
https://www.Writing.Com/go/nl_form
Beholden  
I don't write a lot of comedy but I'm particularly proud of this one:
"Got it! Thanks for submitting it, Beholden. 
Liz B 
Hello and thanks for this newsletter.
I especially enjoyed Hanzel und Gretal. Fractured fairy tales are a favorite of mine. One of my nonfiction pieces, Story Time, touches upon that genre.
The item I highlighted in the box above riffs on a different topic; dentistry. Humor is an important survival tool, for which I am grateful.
Cheers!
Liz B
Got it! Thanks!
Yes, I went to Catholic School, too. I totally understand! 
Madelyn Stone 
They just don't do some things like they used to - I hear myself saying that these days more often than I would like to admit, but it does seem to be true in some cases. I'm glad you got an answer to your lost card. Not getting any conclusion is the worst feeling. And that your mail seems to be flowing well again!
My mom worked for and retired from the USPS. She was proud of her job and took pride in the importance of getting the mail where it was supposed to go. She also had some very interesting stories to tell! I find some USPS employees like her these days, but they are indeed becoming more and more rare.
I agree! USPS service worked really well with people like your mom there. These days--it's hit or miss it seems. Now I must go through address changing again as I head North for the summertime. I sure hope I don't have to go through what I did here in Florida. 
Thank you for your feedback.
Thanks for your feedback, folks!
See you next month! ...
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Comedy: May 06, 2026 Issue [#13719]
