the metamorphosis from me to ME along the journey
~~METAMORPHOSIS -1~~ on the journey|
AN ACCOUNT OF MY LEARNING, POEMING AND LIFE-J0OURNEY, 09/18/09ff
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++THIS IS TO BE READ BY ALL WHO DARE TO READ AND ENJOY!!!**!!!***
SEPTEMBER 21, 2009
This is my inaugural entry in this journal. This is really a fun and rewarding way to do this!! I am looking forward to filling these pages, and more!!!. .
|I found this old poem and a review of it from one of my old NH professors in my inbox today. Food for juicy thought...Rated:
by Jennyj (60) Avg Rating: (4)
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Created: 8:15pm on 02-14-2010
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Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers.
FINALLY, SOME ANSWERS!
He calls this home,
I call it a vastly
I am lonely, unhappy,
but where else could I unashamedly
eat and write poetry, or
write and eat poetry, full time!!
I have suddenly realized at long last
that accepting this stress-free existence
is complete freedom, and in
listening to me, I hear
soft murmurings of happiness
coming over the waves in my mind
despite all my misplaced
efforts at being
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Date: 2/26/13 @ 4:52pm
From: Dave (141)
To: Jennyj (60)
Size: 1.30 kb Show Headers | View Message Source
Subject: Review of FINALLY SOME ANSWERS! (#1645916)
Dave has reviewed "FINALLY SOME ANSWERS!" | Edit | fs
Happy Anniversary, Jenny!
I wanted to take this opportunity to help you celebrate completion of your fourth year in this wondrous community by offering a few observations on this poetic revelation.
You have captured the essence of the existence people engaged in this process endure very effectively. Your ninth line with its twist to “write and eat poetry, full time!” exquisitely SHOWS the all-consuming nature of this addiction. “Lonely” and “misunderstood” for sure, but I would have to disagree about the “bored, unchallenged” aspect. I find the intricate nuances of these endeavors very challenging and far from boring. Indeed! I would be a snarling “grump” if I didn’t get my daily fix.
In the end, I am glad you have come to realize that these simple activities are the source of true happiness. I wish you continued success and hope those “murmurings of happiness” soon become a roaring crescendo.
Let the creativity flow from your soul!
My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
Reply to Dave You responded to this review 02/27/2013 @ 6:05pm EST
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|Cool date! Must mean something lucky!
I perceive that I am continuing to make additional subtle health improvements from my serious freak illness in 2007. I feel subtly stronger and more coherent. My stamina is still improving after all this time. I have been doing a little PT and can see that it is makng me incrementally stronger. I stand up better w ith Rick's help, and stood up by myself at the sink today. I used to not be able to stand up once, much less 3 times in 15 minutes. I have taken possession of the crutches and am getting ready to dance...or rather, start walking practice slowly. To me, it is the same thing!!!
|--amazing record of consistency for me, in keeping with my New Year's intentions. My overarchingvintention is to have incredibly productive and positive days. I am doing a great job of that, so far! I have even written and published a poem on Twitter today! And so, it's off to more greatness tonight and tomorrow!
|Once again, I am behind with these entries. My goal is to write EVERY DAY; lately, I have barely made every MONTH. That is going to change beginning today! I want to have the discipline to write at least one paragraph daily. I am setting up my new schedule, and am going to put in an hour per day for wdc to include my daily paragraph and my daily work on my new nh class. That should put me on track and wdc on my daily map!
|It is another up--side-down day for me. I have JUST gotten to my desk and to my to-do list, and it is 1:30 PM. I have been awake off and on since ~8:00, so I am more than half-way through my energy for the day. I am pretty much finished dealing with me by 8:30--9:00 at night, and am ready to read and play with my cats for the rest of my awake time. I guess between 9:00 AM and now, I scurry around doing house work, taking care of all of us, eating whatever goes by, checking and responding to email, and chatting with Sander and listening to her day. So, by now, when I am first at the desk, I am really ready for a nap instead of a full day of me and writing and more cats and housework. Ugh.
So, here I am in my upsidedown day. It used to feel like an entire upsidedown life for a long time. I am glad I have quit feeling so displaced or misplaced. I am now repurposed and goal oriented and happy once again!
|I almost entitled this "backpedaling" but then caught myself and a vision of my positive day, and realized that this day does not deserve being dissed like that! I am not sure why I even think that I am backpedaling. I think I am just tired and pouty--gross and pouty, in Drew's analysis.
I am actually amazed at how together I am in all this wild and crazy millieu. I have realized that my reaction to constant dismal doesn't have to be more dismal to match theirs. If I want to be foolishly happy, I can do so! I don't have to be a bitch or a curmudgeon just to feed their BS.
I have been spending all day back here in our room with all of the cats. That is kind of fun. We have more cats-per-inch [CPI] than should be allowed, but that's OK with me. Makes it a little furry, but that is OK too.
The freelancing is going well. If I could make myself work, I would have a good income. It is just the inertia that is keeping me from exceling.
I actually have a skype meeting tonite with a proposed employer. It is for a ghost-writing job. I am not sure that it is a correct fit, but I don't want to say no until I find out more about it. I guess she meant 7:00 her time, tho. Not sure it is going to happen at this rate tonight!
Need to keep this up every night to get in shape for the blog group!
|I have joined the blogging circle of friends today to check out my real ability to blog. I have been contemplating starting a blog to advance my freelancing. This blog opportunity here at wdc will help show me my blog-ability. Am I interesting, or just another drone. Am I committed enough to it to do it consistently? As I am having these boring, empty evenings all of a sudden bc of Rick's work schedule, I see a real time slot that needs an activity. This could be just the thing that I am looking for. I could dedicate my early weekday evenings to wdc, to my classes and this new blog thing and any other stuff I get into now that I have this unclaimed slot. I guess I can go ahead and claim it. If I claim it for something fun, like wdc, then I have to take care NOT TO GIVE IT AWAY to anything else!! Like, I need to solidify my schedule to stipulate to myself that this early evening space is reserved for writing and personal stuff like reading my free books, etc; Time for me. In appreciation of me. Maybe that way, I won't feel so yucky about myself all the time.
|I am entering Seuss's Pieces Writing Writers Week Contest my poem entitled:
No One Can Make Me:
<a href="http://blog.emilysuess.com/2012/09/10/writers-week-2012-writing-contest/" ><img src="http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd64/2writehands/writers-week-official-entrycopy.jpg" alt="writers' week writing contest" /></a>
NO ONE CAN MAKE ME!!
By Jennifer A. Jenson
No one can make me.
I'm putting my foot down now.
I am in control!
I am in control:
all my goals fit my own path.
Naysayers be dammed!
Naysayers be damned.
I am my OWN person now;
I'm true to myself!
I'm true to myself.
productive, satisfying growth!
I choose happiness!
I choose happiness.
No one tells me how to feel:
no one can make me!