*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Creative fun in
the palm of your hand.
Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/notebook/nick133
Please follow an ASR rating.*
Nick  
I've just been rushed to hospital with food poisoning. I thought I'd eaten an onion but it was a daffodil bulb. The doctor said I'd be out in the spring.
Nick  
A policeman knocked on my door and said "where were you between 4 and 6".I said " in infant school".
I love it! *Laugh*
Nick  
I've got to take my golf shoes back, I got a hole in one.
Nick  
My wife asked me why I spoke so quietly in the house! I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening.
She laughed, I laughed, Alexa laughed, Siri laughed.
Nick  
Breaking news. A man who took an airline company to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case.
))))))*Rolling*))))) *ThumbsUpR*

Nick  
I once met a martial artist who was giving away free chocolate bars. I asked him if I could take 2
He said no but you can taekwondo
Nick  
A friend of mine got crushed by a pile of books, he's only got his shelf to blame.
Nick  
I never thought I would be the kind of person to get up really early and go for a run. And I was right.
Nick  
A woman in the bank said she wanted to check her balance so I gave her a push.
Nick  
I had my first violin lesson yesterday, I found it a bit fiddly.
Nick  
The other day I lost my tree so I nailed a picture of it to my dog.
Nick  
Edited
I'll never allow my mom to go into a nursing home.
She can go stay with my sister.
Nick  
Apparently I've been round these parts for 7 years today.
How time flies when you're having fun.😁😁👍👍😂