I'm not sure what point you're trying to make in this poem. You seem to be arguing against what I perceive as a caricature of organized religion but I'm not exactly sure what issue it is you have with it. Is this supposed be against Marian veneration? Catholicism? Christianity? Organized religion in general? That said, I like your style and think the poem flows well.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/15nmcbride