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51
51
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
*Snowman*Welcome to WDC CapTEL! I am here with a review to celebrate you, new author!*Star*

*Swordl* I enjoy medieval stories so I was drawn to your title. Your very short tale has the basic beginning, middle and end with some cool ideas like the "Laser passage" and the use of a "Wrench"! Original! *Thumbsup*

*Swordr* I would have liked more details about the characters and some description of the action between the knight and the troll. I wanted to hear more about this passage and where it was and who locked up the princess and why. It would make it more exciting and fill out the story line. *Wink*

*Castle* Also, just a note. I found it a bit distracting to read as you capitalize every word and are missing punctuation so I could tell when one sentence ended and a new began. It gives the reader time to pause to take in what you said when punctuation is consistent.


*Castlegr* Your genre choices are well chosen and tag line gives us the theme of the story. *Thumbsup*

*Star*This is a great start and I would like to hear more. Thanks for sharing your vision and cool ideas at WDC! Have fun as you write on!

I am happy to revisit this story should you do a revision and re-rate it as well! *Wink*

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#1300305 by Maryann


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52
52
Review of She Smiles at Me  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Snowman**Balloonp* Welcome Joleigh to WDC! I am here with a review to celebrate you, new author! *Star*

*Skier* Oh my gosh! I think that mirror experience would be rather eerie. I like how you lead us into why slowly. *Thumbsup*

*Snow4* The free style suits the theme and repeating the word "smile" is effective in emphasizing that aspect. The description of the image is vivid and I smiled at the "tiny laugh lines". *Smile* The off rhyme at the end with "fact" and "back" is effective touch. I liked the assonance of the long i sound in "eyes" and "lines" too. I wondered about using "tiny" twice so close together as variety is nice. Yet, I actually like the flow of it. *Wink*

*Snowman* Creepy. I was imagining a creepy smile, as you used horror as a genre. This is quite evocative and allows for our imagination to engage! *Star*

Thanks for sharing your gift and vision. Keep on writing on! And have fun at WDC. *Starstruck*


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#1300305 by Maryann
53
53
Review of Winter Night  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Snow5**Skier*Happy anniversary days Arakun! I am here with a review to celebrate you *Star* in our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group Raid! I found a winter theme item.*Wink*


*Snowman*Lovely! I am reminded of a lullaby as I read your lyrical winter poem out loud. It flows in a regular rhythm with simple rhymes and vivid images. I was drawn in right from the sparkly first line!

*Snow4* Your vocabulary was well chosen with suggestive active verbs like "snuggle" and "sighing" to create personification of the tulips, and snow. I loved the idea of tulips snuggling! *Delight* You created a pleasing soundscape too with your use of assonance and consonance. I could read it over and over.

*Snowman*Punctuation assisted the read and the rhyming couplet style was a perfect choice that put me in mind of a song. *Smile*

*Starstruck* Thank you for sharing your lyrical gift and vision that was so appealing. I can see the "diamonds" (brilliant comparison) and "velvet sky" ( a beautiful line to read!)

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star* and may you have many more fulfilling and fun years at WDC!

eyestar
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*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*
54
54
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*BalloonR**ConfettiP*Happy New Year Season greet! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Star*

*Delight*Wow! This was a profound sentimental expression and I loved the comparison of the elements to the heart. Brilliant concept which you revealed effectively for me to vision it. Clear vivid images of sand, water and the effects they have drew my nature loving spirit into the poem.

*Balloonp* The free style suits the theme and intent and I think the use of periods in the phrases make us pause to consider each thought. It works well for me.

*Balloonp*The last line sums it up...all the experiences you list "cultivate" the generosity. That word is perfect.

*Balloony* Thanks for sharing your uplifting vision that gave me something to ponder. I enjoyed the reverie. *Star*


Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
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55
55
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Smile* I had to smile at your title that made me curious!

*Balloonp* Your short tale was really entertaining and made me laugh. I see where the title is perfect too. I recall that movie and good for you to see "cosmological significance"! The references to the movie were effective as the short retell of Rock biter's conversation.

*Balloongo* The dialogue was well written and showed the apparent differences in knowledge of the two characters. The bit of a twist at the end where she tries to salvage the topic was unexpected and made me smile. Wonderful turn around! Nice message that there is always hope in relationship. *Star*

*Quill* Only one typo glitch I saw, Missing quotation marks after "I don't think so," in the second line. *Wink*

*Starstruck* Thanks for sharing this entertaining tale and your gift! You could add "comedy" maybe to the genre selection. It was fun.

Happy Happy New year!

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

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56
56
Review of Sunset  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Happy New Year rinoxy! I am here with a review to celebrate you. *Delight*

*Sun* Wow! I was really engaged with your imagery and deep thought in this short free style poem. It has a reality and felt a bit sad even though death is just a moving on. *Smile*

*Sun* The comparison is effective. I like the free style and I was pondering if a natural punctuation would add a bit of pause and potency. The ideas seem to run together, which can be a chosen effect too. *Wink*

*Sun*You used some nice sound combinations like repeating the long i, long e in words. It was pleasant to read aloud. I loved the final phrase too. *Star*

*Starstruck* Thank you for sharing this moving, natural expression with a philosophical touch. Keep on writing on into 2021! *Quill*

redone anniversary version without number!
57
57
Review of Winter  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC AngelWords! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Snow4*Wow! I enjoyed your reverie on winter. Your images are vivid. I liked the way you personify Snow as washing the lawn. Brilliant. I could so feel the fire and see that cat! *Delight*

*Snow4* Under your genre selection I would put Nature, Animal to be more specific. *Smile*

*Snow4* Your nonet form is well constructed but it is missing a line, I think. I counted 8. I count 9,8,6,6,4,3,2,1 in word count. *Wink* I enjoyed the rhyme scheme too. If you did not name it a nonet, it makes a wonderful evocative creation just the same.

*Starstruck* Thanks for sharing your first item at WDC! I really could enter into your vision. Happy New year and I hope you find a home here.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
58
58
Review of American Haiku  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*BalloonR**ConfettiP*Happy New Year and anniversary Blimprider. What a great way to celebrate a new year when you signed in here. *Delight* I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Star*

*Balloonb* This title caught my interest as I enjoy Haiku and am always trying to improve mine. *Smile*

*Balloong* I was fascinated as I had not heard of this type of commercial art form that does rather reflect the idea of haiku in its brevity and subtle expression. The title about the mom raising her kids on the short ads is cool.

*Balloongo* Your theme is appealing and the idea of meeting, sharing and creating together is refreshing. I like the no contest style as it gives more space for invention in the moment and open ended creativity. I like interactive quality.

*Balloonv* The intro to the activity is well written and easy to read. Your purpose and the criteria for participation are very clear and thanks for keeping it open for all ages. *Smile*

*Starstruck* Thanks for sharing this awesome contribution to WDC. I will be putting it on my favs and hope to pop by for a try soon! Happy New year and thanks for all you be and do to add more shine to WDC! *Star*


Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
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59
59
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp*Happy New Year! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*I was drawn to your comical title with its old expressions! It certainly fits the theme of your poem too. LOL

*Thumbsup*I enjoyed reading your short quatrain with its easy rhyme and flow. The soundscape was pleasing too. Well done! The hope that actually engaging in conversation is evident...and could be a dying art with all the many techie possibilities to avoid human interaction.

*Laugh*I laughed at the third line as I have often heard folks say there is nothing on, even with all the millions of channels. (well, nothing good anyway...could be a generation thing. LOL)

*Fairy2* You engage us with your suggestion and using the word "might" leaves it as a possibility not a certainty! It might appeal to folks to try it out. *Smile*

*Heart*Thanks for sharing your humour in this message that gives something to think about...and it is more than a nickle's worth for those who can hear. *Star*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

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60
60
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Rocket*Wow! I like the idea of Space Kid adventure and the message about exploring to avoid boredom. Painting was a cool choice for them to try. It was interesting what they could watch on the planet. I smiled at "eating competitions." *Laugh* That they learned to use google was funny too...as earthlings do make it a source of knowledge. Space kid assimilates!

The short story flowed in a coherent manner and was easy to follow. I sensed the pride of accomplishment with the last line! I wonder what was in the painting.

*Quill*A few things I wondered about:

Should the word "they" be "he" in line one to agree with Space Kid..singular? *Wink* though I see you continue with the pronoun "they" so who are they? *Confused* I get maybe that Space Kid is a group mind?

"their" should be "there" in "what their is to do".

I am not sure you need the word "first" in "supplies first" as you already indicated the necessity with the word "before". *Smile*

I think in "getting the supplies", it would sound better with "they got.." as you used the gerund "making" in the beginning. It would also make the sentence sound complete.

*Rocket* I like the imaginative flavour of the story and can see it be one of a sequel of adventures, where you can add more details about Space Kid, the homeworld (I like the name of it) and how they found earth and chose to explore etc.! A great beginning.

Thanks for sharing your talent and originality! Keep on writing.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
61
61
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*Snow4* Happy Holidays and blessings for a happy new year ruwth! I am happy to review your item from the "I Write in 2020" forum.

*Delight*Wow! What a great idea for a holiday...like hold still from all the world and it's pressures and reflect. It might bring a peace to folks too.

The letter format is well written and presents details and possibilities for the suggestion. I like how the idea goes beyond cultural considerations... includes all humans!

I noticed one typo: "pause o reflect", o >to. *Wink*

*Star* It would be so beneficial if people would do this even without holiday status...we might see the way we are treating the earth and others with our judgements and unawareness. *Heart* I like the positive hopeful tone of this idea.

Thanks for sharing your gift. Happy New Year and write on!

redone anniversary version without number!
62
62
Review of 420 2E  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with Noticing Newbies Committee  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Star**BalloonB*Welcome to WDC! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Delight*

*Delight*I really enjoyed reading this short piece and you did a great job with the first person narration in the present tense. It is a challenge to do with consistency.

A few spots to check with this:

"everytime she LOOKS....feels trapped" instead of past tense.
"her neighbours PLAY..instead of played. to be consistent.
"prays" for "prayed"

Also you begin with "she" but change to I in the third paragraph. I would keep the voice the same. *Wink*

I notice a little typo: you don't need "is" with "that's" in "that's is not working." *Wink*

*Delight*You really capture this woman's mindset and unease in her surroundings and relationship. Good detail in showing why this is so. I was drawn into the story as your description of the setting was vivid too.*Star*

Thanks for sharing your gift with us. Keep on Writing!*Smile*

eyestar
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63
63
Review of River Crossing  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with Noticing Newbies Committee  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Star**BalloonB*Welcome to WDC! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


Wow! I was drawn into your story with the detailed description in your first line. I could so picture the setting. *Thumbsup*

You really captured the aspects of having to hide and the wariness of the slaves along the journey. I like how they did not take the boat...it gives them a sense of honesty in spite of desperation. Using the awareness of the sun to delineate the day time on the trail was effective and would be a natural tool.

A few glitches that I noted though I am not a pro! *Wink*

Maybe tighten this phrasing: "relaxing and even sleeping." to relaxing into sleep".


In the 4th paragraph I see you used "continue" forms twice. Maybe the word "continuing" could be dropped and you do say it was a gentle rain so we can infer that it was still raining from the day before.

I don't think you need the words " though, and" in the next paragraph. Keep it straightforward.

I think "they" should be "then" in "hereabouts, they maybe there.." typo. *Wink*

*Smile*I was glad they found a bridge for rushing water is not appealing to me and many on the pioneer trails never made it across these rivers.

I could feel the relief when they made it to the next step and you leave the tale ready for the next instalment.

Thanks for sharing your first post at WDC! Keep on Writing!*Smile*

Blessings for a shiny new year.*Star*

64
64
Review of Any Juice Will Do  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Snow4**Xmastree* Happy Holidays Rachel! Congrats on 4 completing all the Contest Challenge commitments! What a feat. *Starstruck*

*Snow4*I love the dream song you chose to parody here. What a fun choice and I imagine a bit of a challenge. I had to laugh when I first saw the title about any juice will do... I thought of someone being so desperate. *Laugh* When I read your fine tune, I saw it fits exactly. I enjoyed reading and when you mentioned "shelves" I got the covid connection. Well done. You did mention it in your tag line..which I did not read first. LOL

*Delight*Ok! I could so sing it especially if I hold notes a bit longer on some words. I enjoy doing parodies and they can be challenging to get perfect. LOL You did a great job and I had fun down memory lane.

*Snow4* In line 3, should "no" be "not"?

*Snow4* The rhythm and rhyme were pleasing and I had to laugh at the need for a juice that won't kill. It is not really funny as we never know what they put in drinks...words you cannot pronounce. *Wink*

*Star* Thanks for sharing your entertaining concoction... a great juice in my book! *Wand*

Have a wonderful holiday and many blessings into the new year. *Heart*

redone anniversary version without number!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
65
65
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Star* Blessings on this holiday season ruwth! *Angel* I am happy to review this piece from the "I Write in 2020" forum. *Delight*


*Xmastree* What a wonderful poem for the season and such an original entry to the Story-poem contest too. Wow! I like the idea of encapsulating Jesus's life with these well chosen images. I think it would be challenging to pick ideas and tell the story in a poem. Well done! *Star*

*Angelic*I enjoyed the style with its short lines and how you added bits of rhyme to tie it together. I liked the enjambment of "a man...Born blind" as it added an emphatic vibe. The idea of healing a birth defect makes it seems more potent an act. The use of assonance really assisted the flow of the read as well. I noticed things like repeated long "i" sound, "ea" and cool soundscapes like "virgin birth", and bits of alliteration. *Thumbsup*

*Giftp* I did have a few thoughts as I read that you might consider, or not! *Wink*

*Snow4*Where you used "he" twice in lines 2-3: I wondered about making the second instance of "He" to the word "Who" for a better flow.

*Snow4* Where you say "he raised a man" : Again maybe to avoid two "He" phrases, maybe something like: and even raised a man.... It gives it some flow and not so abrupt. *Wink*

*Snow4* And where you have "He Ascended..." I thought a gerund might work....eg "ascending into heaven". It would give emphasis to the idea of Ascension, not just the He, which we know from the line before you are speaking of him. *Smile*

*Starstruck*The title is like a prophecy and was a neat idea to point to the future as you reveal his past story. Cool. Thanks for sharing your tribute to Jesus and the message of God's love.

Have a blessed time. Peace, joy and love this season and beyond. *Heart*

Write on into the new year!

redone anniversary version without number!



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
66
66
Review of The Waiting Game  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Confettir* Happy November mastiff! I am here to review your piece in the "I Write in 2020" forum!*Delight*

*Thumbsup* Yay! You did a great job of not using the letter E in this 14 line poem! The topic is a timely relevant one and expresses commentary on the political situation of the election. You capture the the confusion, the divisions, the hope and the feeling of the election night.

I loved the personal vivid lines like "too tight...chills.." in verse 2. I could sense folks reacting in different ways, waiting for the outcome of this especially tense situation. I think the short verses and short lines really help to build that atmosphere: tight, hard to breathe. You engage the reader with questions. The "tiny light" and the last line were effective and appealing. a bit of hope.

*Star*This concise verse had a pleasing soundscape to read aloud and gave a clear sense of the poet's observations and feelings. Well done!

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67
67
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Witch* Helllooooo Jeff! I am flying in from the Ghostly Hollows Power Raid and could not resist this magical spell! You are truly a word wizard in this piece. *Wand*

*Bats*Wow! I loved reading this tongue twisting creation out loud slowly or quick. The word choices are amazing and create a vivid message and energy that match the picture. I especially liked the image of "a rhythm section of insurrection" and had to go find out that "intellection" is a word! *Shock* I love learning new words! Cool.

*Fairy*You really evoked thinking this all through and it makes sense from the viewers point of view. I wanted to read a comma after "protection" though I see you are not using regular punctuation. It just struck me here. LOL

*Moon*Wow. She does not think highly of herself, which suits the essence of the picture prompt I think. Brilliant conception! *Starstruck* Thanks for sharing your unique craft.

eyestar
a new model
68
68
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Leafr*Happy Fall The Puppet Master! Thank you so much for your generosity in our {item:}. Here is the third review from your winning package. *Delight*

*Leaf2o*Wow! I enjoyed this tale based on historic facts and it really fits the quote you left at the end. It has a flavour of "The Titanic Movie" and I like your take on what could have happened on this ship.

*Leaf2br*The story flowed coherently with effective interspersing of the present moments with the Grandpa's words as story teller. *Star* I really felt his loss as he remembers the past. The dream sequence was appealing too and the ending so heartwarming. The notion of being able to connect with the other side is well shown.

*Leafo* The scene on the boat was charming and the language, speech and manners suit the time of the incident. Old fashioned! The meeting and connection seem realistic as you show their common interest in the boats, drawing and wanting family as well as the pull to romance. A good start that could lead to deeper relationship.

*Leafy* Adding conversation into the narrative added drama and showed character's feelings and continued the story telling. It is cool that the family likes to hear the stories and memories of the elder. I think it is something missing in our times.

*Quill* I offer a few ideas for refinement in terms of what stuck out to me as I read.

~In line three: "yes to see the grandkids" refine "the grandkids" to "them" as you mention the grandkids in the line before so we know they are there.

~In "hugged me and kissed me goodbye." Maybe drop one "me" .

~In " Margaret smiled softly." what does that look like? I think. "she smiled" is simple enough.

~I understand the attraction of the two people and the good night kisses. I did not see why he would carry her to her room though and put her to bed. They just met and she can walk. Could be for romantic effect in the story telling but threw me out a bit. LOL

~In "Suddenly we heard another explosion," I wanted to drop "suddenly" as it seem redundant and slows the action.

*Treefall* The scene at the end when he finished was moving and all the family got to say goodbye without knowing.

*Star*I really had fun entering this vision. Thanks for sharing your gift and craft. The links at the end were convenient too.

eyestar
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69
69
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Leafr*Happy Fall The Puppet Master! Thank you so much for your generosity in our "Invalid Item. Here is one of the reviews from your winning package. *Delight*

*Leaf2O*Oh wow! I so enjoyed reading your story and it reminded me of the Phantom of the Opera. I loved the originality in the surprising twist in the solution to the duel! Well done.

*Leaf2R*The title suits the content and theme with its elements of paranormal, romance and mystery. It made me curious to read the tale.

*Leaf2Br* Your first paragraph hooked me and set the scene, main character and how she was seen. I could see her. The story flowed in a coherent manner and the plot was strong.

*Leafr* The character of the Apparition was well developed and shown through her actions, inner dialogue, conversation and description. I could really get inside her head and understand her motivation. Having to watch her student have a normal relationship would trigger her wounded self. She seems realistic as she has gifts, and yet hidden vulnerability and anger.

*Leafy* The mix of dialogue, inner reflection and narrative worked well. The dialogues were natural and purposeful in furthering the story line and character revelation. *Thumbsup* Descriptions were detailed and set the scene and time line effectively. {eg. the music, cathedral, dress, car, names etc.} Incidents like the banner and lights add to her feelings about the couple.

*Leafo* The problem from the Apparition's view point is clear and the solution in her letter was unexpected. What an old fashioned idea. I love it and to think that women will do that is cool!

~I wanted to drop "breathlessly" in " Nathaniel breathlessly ran.."

~I wondered what "ruggedly handsome" looked like contrasted with "perfectly groomed face".

~In "she wondered to herself," I don't think you need "to herself" as we know she is thinking and you use italics for her inner thoughts. *Smile*

*Leafbr* You make Nathaniel really seem human in his responses and experiences. I wonder if an angel would be in romantic situations. LOL I like how the energy shifts for the Apparition in the end. She knows she is loved and has friendship.. I love happy endings. *Wink*

*Leaf2y* I enjoyed reading the engaging story and it flowed quite well in a coherent fashion. Use of italics for inner thoughts was effective and kept me in touch with the character during the narration. The point of view seems consistent too. *Smile*

It is so wonderful how you created the tale remniscient of Phantom but with so many twists. *Cool* I loved it! {e;delight}

70
70
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Leafr*Happy Fall The Puppet Master! Thank you so much for your generosity in our "Invalid Item.
Here is one review from your winning package. *Delight*


*Leaf2R*What a brilliant concept using a chess board game for a romantic encounter. The title is appealing and at the end we can get the joke of "not quite". You did a good job with the imagery, few clues until the twist at the end where you reveal the true setting!*Thumbsup*

*Leafr* Vocabulary words like square, approach, advanced, threatened all work to indicate a battle..or a fight where the scout keeps trying to get to his lady. Later we get the chess game image...good clues.


*Leafo* It was quite dramatic when he did finally meet her. I was surprised by her reaction and the revelation of relation to the king. Makes sense as a scout in love from afar might not know that...being from a lower kingdom. *Smile*

*Quill*A few things I noticed for your consideration:

~In the first paragraph I noticed you repeated ideas like "common" and "square". I think it could be tightened up.

~In the second paragraph, perhaps just say "there" for "ladies in the square" as we know that he is in the square.

*Smile* I loved the wisdom of the knight at the end giving a truth and maybe hope to the scout. *Heart*

*Starstruck*I enjoyed this original expression with its well conceived metaphor. Keep on writing.

eyestar
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If you like to review, check out "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group
71
71
Review of Nutria Rodeo  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Genielamp* Hiya thing! I get to review another poem from the "I Write in 2020!" *Delight* What a great response to the prompt and the title was intriguing.

*Smile*Your poem was engaging and fun to read. I loved the description of the creature with the swagger. I could so visualize this! *thumbusp* Thanks too for the note about what a nutria is as I had not heard of it before. Your imagination in making it a strange creature is brilliant. It was effective how you wove the characteristics of the nutria into the tale.

*Flowerv* The form is well composed with rockin' rhythm and rhyme. You built the intensity of the moment clearly as the reader follows the speaker into the wood. You showed the attitude of the creature vividly too.

*Starstruck*Thanks for sharing another of your creative visions and well crafted verse! I was so entertained.

72
72
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*BalloonR**ConfettiP*Happy Fall Norman and Happy anniversary! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Star*

*Laugh* Oh my gosh! This poem is so funny and a delight to read. *Thumbsup*
The four line stanzas were fun to read aloud with their steady rhythm and rhyme. The images were vivid {wieners..lol} and your tone showed the poet's surprise and reluctance til the end. His concern about reactions of ALL kinds were quite reasonable too given the scenario. *Wink*

*Umbrellap* I laughed at the end as the speaker included himself among the body types on the beach. And I can relate to sun burn... fry indeed! *Laugh* Even with bathing wear on.

*Star*What can I say. I was totally entertained and entered your vision easily. Well written! *Salute**Rolling*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile* Hi isokarifrancis! Happy Fall. *Leafr*

I came across another of your quotes and wisdom. *Delight* I enjoy philosophical works. I really had to ponder on the saying!*Think* Personifying the idea of "feedback" and having it have its opinion is brilliant.

I like the idea that feedback can have benefits if we look for them and not take offence, or not take it personally but as a suggestion. Folks can stay in rigid thinking and point fingers out side themselves.

I appreciate the message, which can apply to life and writing!

Thanks for sharing your vision. *Star*

eyestar
Gryffindor sig
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp*Happy Party Days jaya! Congratulations on your win in "Review-A-Rama and for partying with us! *Salute*


*Gemt* Wow! This is a detailed analysis of Jane Austen and the education of women. It is an interesting topic too. I like the tone and your tribute to her "literary genius" at the end.

*Gemp* Using a quote in the first line is a good hook to your introduction and your premise is clear. Weaving in Jane's history and popularity was seamless to give us background to her world so we could better understand her sharing of ideas of education. Your research of the times and using quotes from her books is thorough and helps illustrate your theme. The idea from John Gregory was interesting too. Imagine hiding our education! *Shock* Yet it happened. "the tight rope' image is brilliant. *Cool*

*Gemy*In the line "So says," you do not need that comma after says. *Wink*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your opinion on this subject in an interesting way. I learned a lot.

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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp*Happy Party Days jaya! Congratulations on your win in "Review-A-Rama! *Delight*

*Gemt* Wow! This is a delightful tribute to WDC for its 20th birthday! It has an uplifting tone and vivid details about elements of WDC and why you admire it. I really enjoyed how you kept the lines running as one long sentence. IT flowed in a lovely way with effective enjambments and use of consonance. The rhyme of "tremendously" and "endlessly" works too, even though "ly" adverbs are not too poetic. LOL They fit here and give us a strong message.

*Gemg* Your words for the key letters in the Acrostic were well chosen. I liked "highly valued", "inspiring", "comprising". The last verse stands on its own as a summative description of our community. Well done. *Star*

*Gemo* The key letters blend in well and while it would be nice if they were bolded, it did not take away from the meaningful flow and meaning! *Wink* I don't think you need the exclamation after WDC in the first line as it continues to the next one.
Or it might be "Hello dear WDC! Again ...." or "Hello! Dear WDC, again ....."

Thank you for sharing your vision of WDC and your fine crafting. *Starstruck*

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