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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/afaith/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/3
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677 Public Reviews Given
678 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest and methodical.
I'm good at...
Short stories; grammar.
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Fantasy and Action
Least Favorite Genres
Horror and Melodrama
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Under 5k words.
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Public Reviews
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51
51
for entry "Imperfect Love" 
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: like it a lot on first read, re-reading makes me think this speaker is a tad contradictory

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: sincere, honest, open

*Suitheart* What I liked: the flow, rhyming is fun, especially when it makes sense

A few parting comments...
My love doesn’t promise forever
for forever is a fickle dream;
it might never arrive,
but I do promise to walk with you every day.

sounds like you don't believe in unconditional love....

I don’t promise you the stars and moon
for their beauty is illusion;
even they fade in bright light.
but I do promise to listen to everything you say

ok, a practical lover, I can dig it...sort of, I prefer my love to be imaginative ;-P

I do not promise you a complete harmony
for friction is necessary;
complete agreement just means compromise,
but I do promise to give your opinions some weight

i wouldn't say "necessary" but "common" meaning the odds are you'll disagree but that doesn't mean there will be friction, just agree to disagree

My love is not perfect; it might not even be true,
but whatever it is, it is only meant for you!

that doesn't make much sense, if it's not true then it's a lie, opposite of truth is deception; but I get where you're going with this, nice work

4 because I like the idea that a guy is being honest with a girl about how much of a deceiver he is...if that wasn't your intent then it's a 3.5 *Bigsmile*

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
52
52
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hey!


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: great reminder about the pitfalls of pride

*Pencil* Theme: don't take others for granted or let your pride take over

*Tiedye4* Speaker(s)/Flow: flows well, the ease with which you tied the phrases together was my favorite

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone/Mood: reminiscent then morose and regretful

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*And cry whenever I hear a sad love song...I’ve lost any and all chance at finding bliss,
bit dramatic, but the emotion comes through


Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
53
53
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: i like it, lots of emotions

*Pencil* Storyline:a grieving niece delivers a message but receives a ton more in response

*Tiedye4* Characters: Esther - deceased Auntie, Mr. Damian Edwards - the unsuspecting werewolf, Audrina - Mr. Wolfie's soulmate

*Home* Setting: a lighthouse of all places

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: inquisitive, secretive, dangerous (that fever sounded deadly almost)

*Telephone* Dialogue: a bit formal, but it worked

*Suitheart* What I liked: the idea of stumbling into werewolf love...I'm just glad he and aunt were never intimate...

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*A young man lay clasping a picture frame next to his chest...."Mr. Edwards?"..."No, I'm Audrina, Esther's niece. You're sick."


*BulletB*The young man's lids snapped open, but his eyes were glazed over from fever. "Esther?"
you never mentioned his eyes were closed, why not just leave it out? b/c it reads clunky, maybe: young man's lids snapped open, but his eyes were glazed

*BulletR*What Audrina found odd was that Damian was a young man. Her aunt was eighty-two when she passed.


*BulletV*"I am a werewolf. Stay with me."


*Bullet*"Esther's scent was close, but you, your scent, it's driving me wild, giving me hope. No one else has ever made me feel like this. You're my soulmate. Please stay."
ooooooooooo, a take on the bella/jacob/renesmee triangle, I GET IT! i like it

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
54
54
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: love it

*Pencil* Storyline: if the muse could speak...what would it sound like?

*Home* Setting: the mind

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: reflection, biographical, ardent

*Telephone* Dialogue: speaker is speaking both to them-self out loud AND to the reader

*Suitheart* What I liked: it is also a passion that needs to be nurtured, to such an effect that it sets our spirits soar in blissful state, and it stirs aglow emotional embers that would give life to these stories... forming multi-colored snowflake-like shapes of stories and ideas.
I can even see my feelings when I heard about it in vibrant colors.

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*only waiting to rot into oblivion.
that was my predicament pre-WDC, now I at least have a place to put things and get/gain encouragement for more

*BulletB*my friend suggested I submit my compositions to a certain local paper without pay. “A literary contribution without pay is worthless,” I told her. But now I’m going to make a retraction.
I have no qualms with getting published for free, I just need to sit and DO it; case in point, my mom suggested writing to the local paper about the increase in the likelihood of me being pooled over during holidays, especially when I have a passenger

*BulletR*the vital benefit that they can impart to the readers.
not to mention, the free publicity

*BulletV* I often found myself toying with the thought of how exhilarating it must be to create such realms for mental and emotional festivities and to be able touch others’ lives with my stories
exactly! I don't have to be a Rowling, but it would be nice to be a Pierce or a Sands....

*Bullet* I came across an invitation from one of the country’s leading magazines to contribute some viewpoints on certain topics.
I'm doing that now with bubblews but I'd like to respond to an interesting topic for an actual magazine...

*BulletG*Sadly, for many years, my writing career hibernated, like a seed covered with a blanket of snow in winter, and during all those years, I felt as though the poetical river inside me that kept me animated got drained, making my life dry. But amid that aridity, that passion kept burning, though it remained confined within me for many years.
it's funny, I felt that way before WDC and after I stopped LiveJournal, but now I'm starting to feel that way again because I'm not taking the time to finish a novel or get published, so much work to do...so little time

*BulletB*I have to let out the whirlwind of emotions that are locked up within myself. I have messages to tell the whole world, messages of hope, comfort and inspiration derived from my own experiences. I must not allow such beautiful thoughts get dispersed among the cosmic dusts of the universe without having a chance for them to settle within the human hearts and breathe life to them.
indeed, I've always said that EVERYONE has a unique story worth telling and worth listening to

*BulletR*in Thomas Gray’s

Full many a
in Thomas Gray's what? what's the title of that poem?

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
55
55
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with 30 Day Image Prompt Contest Co...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
LOVE this group, but can we PLEASE get a link at the top to go straight to forum like Emily's 30 day blog group?......PUHLEASSEEEEE!
56
56
Review of Distilled  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hey!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: interesting idea

*Pencil* Storyline: The life of a young boy

*Tiedye4* Characters: the boy and his mother

*Home* Setting: the suburbs

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: random stream of consciousness, the main character is a major daydreamer and is very in his head

*Telephone* Dialogue: disjointed, but interesting

*Suitheart* What I liked: "and I look down, afraid of myself."

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*I emerge from my dreams.... hissing wind of the dark.
need to separate this from the next sentence, italicize/quote or something

*BulletB*We lived for a couple of years from her father's money and from my parent's savings and when I turned fifteen mom found a job as a maid in a rich man's house downtown.
her parents had a palace, how are they broke after only 2 years? no family business? is the dad poor too? what's he do, people from money don't usually make a slow gradual fall into near poverty....

*BulletR*"Go to your room!" , I was six but I still understood.
stay chronolgical, first he's 15 and poor now he's 6 and dad randomly dies?

*BulletV*A red fox ran passed a decaying trees that stood curved,
A red fox ran past a decaying tree that stood curved,

A few parting comments...
i understand the spaces are to break up the scenes, but they should have mini headers/titles like "5 days later" "tomorrow" 'the date' or just a series of "------" that separate them
also, you need to really think about bringing all your this together in a more cohesive fashion, otherwise, why not just make it all a collection of poems?


Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
** Image ID #1787886 Unavailable **
Smallest sig yet
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
57
57
Review of A Fear of Flying  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hey!

Welcome to WdC Power Reviewer's *Heart* Spread the Love Weekend Power Raid! *Heart*


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: o dear, your morbid black comedies have a way of making me laugh, it's quite unsettling/worrisome....

*Pencil* Theme: don't fly if you're afraid, paranoid, and/or slightly schizophrenic

*Home* Setting: on a plane...good thing there were no snakes....

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: dream state, detail oriented, matter-of-fact

*Telephone* Dialogue: "stop screaming, you're dead", priceless

*Suitheart* What I liked: the randomness;
in a fit of amusement, pull the elastic of the hanging oxygen mask
around his head. Not that he is breathing.

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*onfidently lounging
in the three extra inches that
the reclining seat gives me.
ironical contrast

*BulletB*My mind casually drifts out the window
along the swell of the clouds. It’s peacefully white.
I think of heaven until I realize the stars are gone.
such a peaceful scene/beginning; ready for the contrast

*BulletR*What’s that movie, with the plane crash
and the premonition? That one where death
reaches out past the wreck?
FINAL DESTINATION! I only ever watched the first one all the way through...arguably the best, most memorable, but then I've only watched the 1st....

*BulletV*I think: If I go home, am I going to slip on a wet kitchen floor,
or get run over by a lawn mower? Will the wounds in my feet get infected
and poison my blood? Will lightning strike my car off an overpass
as I drive to work? Will it hurt? Could it be worse than this?
this really confused me at first but then I remembered the movie, final destination, what will it be?

*Bullet*“It’s harder than it looks, isn’t it?” I say to the dead guy....He starts screaming for a flight attendant and won’t stop,
why? just...why? is she afraid of her final destination? is it a control thing? or just a need for endorphin release?

*BulletG*I’m too tired to deal with the dead anymore.... The clouds are white and quiet,
and they remind me of heaven.
back to abruptly peaceful....love it

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
58
58
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hey!

Welcome to WdC Power Reviewer's *Heart* Spread the Love Weekend Power Raid! *Heart*


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: interestingly enough, I saw 'low', thought 'sow', had never seen low as a verb before and lo/behold it means 'moo'...neat

*Pencil* Theme: low is where the heart is....

*Home* Setting: dry desert(ed) land next to lush green grash

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: farmer town pastoral, lazy, hazy, dizzy-dazzy

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*Crooked wooden fingers once
clawed up through the dirt.
Now, dead in the heat--
burned red in the sun.
i don't get it, clay? are some tractor spikes made of wood? I need a farmer....

*BulletB*Under one
in the distance,
a tree? wooden tree....but it was clawed up? how can a cow fit under a clawed up tree, lost again....

*BulletR*obviously angular,
how so? bent at an angle?

*BulletV* minuscule piece of my heart
that refuses to come home.
ooooo, it's a metaphor?! I get metaphors...that's kewl

A few parting comments...
i learned much today, thank you for that

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
59
59
Review of Decomposition  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hey!

Welcome to WdC Power Reviewer's *Heart* Spread the Love Weekend Power Raid! *Heart*


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: thanks to morbid curiosity I was enthralled by the very title....

*Pencil* Theme:you guessed it, decomposing death

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: planning for the future

*Suitheart* What I liked: the thought process and sheer honesty

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG* I'd like
to casually decompose myself
above the ground,
this literally made me LOL, perhaps that's a tad inappropriate, but for a person to speak control over their own death and in such a lackadaisical fashion...it struck me as humorous

*BulletB*Perhaps I'd grow small green fingers
Perhaps I'll grow; this is to take place in the future correct?

*BulletR*once enough reality has melted away
not sure I get the use of "reality" here, sounds like trying to hard; maybe stick with 'flesh' or 'corporeal meat sack'

A few parting comments...
wanted to give a 5 but the in-depth analysis caused a couple oddities to surface; ION: this reminds me of "sky burial" that I've read about in some of my fav fantasy novels, where corpses are left in the open to be fed on by birds so their spirits can take flight, interesting theory....cremation for me please!

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
60
60
Review of Snapshots  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: I feel like I've missed something...why is she sad?

*Pencil* Storyline: a depressed girl/woman reviews a mental snapshot of one Easter day at church?

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: despondent, depressed, overwhelmed

*Suitheart* What I liked: look inside another's mind

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*Time stops still.
Time stands still.

*BulletB* in on her, that there was no chance
in on her, that there was no chance

*BulletR* invitation for a sunday dinner
Sunday dinner

*BulletV*The aromas from his clothes begin to transport me back to a life worth living; when I had so much to live for. As his fingers claw my back, I feel nothing. I am numb.
quite a contrast...is he clawing her back in love?

A few parting comments...
I can appreciate the dark and emotional but a more clearly defined....something would have helped, I concrete reason for her sadness and if there is not explainable reason for her to say it or otherwise acknowledge it would have been helpful; 3.5 because at the end I'm as lost as the speaker, but 4 in terms of how much you wrote...kudos

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
61
61
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: oooo think i see where this is going! nice Romeo/Juliet twist....

*Pencil* Storyline: the royal boys go for a little competitive hunt

*Tiedye4* Characters: Raoul, how attached are you to that name? I feel it's been overused and your main character deserves better;

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: familial, competition-tense, wondering/fantastical when Raoul sees the girl

*Telephone* Dialogue: I believe the brotherly banter

*Suitheart* What I liked: the mystery of the girl and painting of the boys personalities

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG* The older brother leaned against his chestnut steed
The older brother Demetri leaned against his chestnut steed

*BulletB* His overexerted steed got no second glance or reward for its part in the race.
he's coming across as a callous master to his horse....is that purposeful?

*BulletR*admit it. “Let us hunt. ‘Tis a beauteous morn, animals shall be aplenty.” “And perhaps you may
unnecessary quotes, same speaker; also, separate the speakers by paragraphs

*BulletV*were much alike a family tradition
were much alike a family tradition

*Bullet*Beauty of forests were a lost cause on him.
The beauty of the forest was lost on him.

*BulletG*If Demetri saw her, she wo
awful late in the game to finally mention his name

*Bullet*other corrections
both brotherS shared this quality;
as the sentencing become increasingly more severe.;
The pines and cedars leanED and swayed with the breeze,

A few parting comments...
find other ways to describe the boys besides 'younger' and 'older'; it's ok to use once but gets repetitive quickly

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
62
62
Review of Mountains  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

Welcome to WdC Power Reviewer's *Heart* Spread the Love Weekend Power Raid! *Heart*


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: neat

*Pencil* Theme: ode to mountains

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: wondrous, admiring, exalting (in short form)

*Suitheart* What I liked: imagery

A few parting comments...
not a lot to say about this one, I was able to envision a mountain; 4 because it's not knock me off my feet amazing, for short poetry forms it's nice to have 2/3 cinquains in a row to build a more complete picture

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
63
63
Review of Silent Rain  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: very introspective review of what it means to grieve

*Home* Setting: the hurting heart

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: bereaved, cold, wet

*Suitheart* What I liked:My face is numb. I touch it, just to reassure myself it is still there.;
And I know what that sound is...
It is the endless flow of my soul pouring out of me, drowning me in my despair.

A few parting comments...
not much to say, sounds like grief done right, and by 'right' I mean 'naturally', we all feel this way at some point after losing someone/thing close and important to us

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
64
64
Review of ♥"JJ"♥  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: this was SUCH an amazingly thoughtful idea!!!!

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: excited, hopeful, community

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*Jannique
beautiful name, you should do an acrostic for her

A few parting comments...
what was the outcome after you gave this to her?! if you ever do it again feel free to use any of my items, I wouldn't know which/what to pick......
perused the first few entries, nice, really like the Voldemort one

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
65
65
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hey!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!
Welcome to WDC! Hope you enjoy the site as much as I do!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: not sure how this is a comedy, the mole is interesting though

*Pencil* Storyline:guy gets recruited for top secret mission...and he has a mole

*Home* Setting: area 51?

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: militaristic...odd....story telling

*Telephone* Dialogue:there isn't much, or enough

*Suitheart* What I liked: the mystery of the mole

A few parting comments...
I suggest changing how you tell this story, it sounds like the narrator is telling a story to his grandkids about his 'hey day'; to interest the reader it would be better to use present tense, as if the story is happening now and today
also, why did he get sent to the basement to 'clean' if there were aliens there?

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Image #1964011 over display limit. -?-
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
66
66
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
Rated: E | (4.5)
cute, i like this, wish the critic was still around....
67
67
Review of The Color of Jade  
for entry "Invalid Entry" 
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: slow read starting out, ends with a nice hanger

*Pencil* Storyline: 4 kids are left to pick up the pieces after a mysterious virus, the oldest brother is MIA

*Tiedye4* Characters: boy/girl twins, baby sister, older brother

*Home* Setting:dystopian/post-apocalyptic nation

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone:sad, morose, bored

*Telephone* Dialogue:cute, a bit forced, how long ago did the boy stop walking by? seems odd her sister would tease her about it unless he walked by yesterday

*Suitheart* What I liked: the idea, premise, relationship between the siblings

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG* only older by two minutes but since the virus, our closeness suffered as him and Kane became severely overprotective and treated me like a child.
what virus? reads funny

*BulletB*The mention of school brought the memory of that boy to my mind again,
how was she able to see him walk by everyday if they went to the same school and thus would have left school at the same time....

*BulletR* he had worked for my uncle and father on our family farm
how could she not know him if he worked for her family!? did he only work for a couple of weeks before 'the virus'?

A few parting comments...
this has legs but for a first chapter it doesn't capture my attention well enough, the cliffhanger was nice though

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
68
68
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Ha, this is neat, like reading a chapter in the WDC history book.
69
69
Review of Writing.Com 101  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Question: So in order to send BOTH a virtual AND physicaal badge it's 35k GPs total? If yes, it may be beneficial to add that to the update *Bigsmile*
70
70
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: Forgot how much I love blogging, this and "Blog Harbor from The Talent Pond"  have really brought that back out in me.

*Suitheart* What I liked: the month on/month off technique

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG* CURRENT COMPETITORS! Click HERE to go straight to the forum.
NEW / INTERESTED BLOGGERS: Please read the Contest rules in the forum first. Thanks! Bigsmile
LOVE when forums have a link down to the forums, having to scroll a looooong entry every time is exhausting; suggest making it more noticeable though, I skipped over it every time until I started this review

*BulletB*January is an OFFICIAL month!
Next month (February) will be an UNOFFICIAL month!
(Sign up with a link to your blog in the forum)
CALL FOR DONORS ---....
all great info

*BulletR*This is a bi-monthly contest having a month-on, month-off format. The Blogging community is a thriving one and this is what keeps people coming back, month after month after month to the most intense battle of the bloggers. *Lightning*

Previously from EARL --- "The blogging challenge is back to life.....
this is slightly redundant, who is EARL and why do I care about his testimony specifically?

*BulletV*The Current 30-Day Blogging
... for all past challenges go to: "Winners List"
great idea

*Bullet*THE PANEL:
now I know who EARL is...why not mention him up around his testimonial?

*BulletG**Blocky*STEPS TO JOIN THE OFFICIAL CHALLENGE*Blocky*
very smart to demand interaction from the very beginning

*BulletB**Blocky*PRIZES (For Official Months only)*Blocky*
always good to know, but I like a lil variety every few months or so....spice it up, so to speak

*BulletR*OFFICIAL EDITION
...
UNOFFICIAL FORMAT
smart use of drop down menus

A few parting comments...
I don't expect to win this month but if I don't sign up now who knows when I will, besides, doesn't matter if you win or lose, it's how you blog that counts ;-P

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of community art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
** Image ID #1787886 Unavailable **
Smallest sig yet
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
71
71
Review of Reality  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: really enjoy how this reads and the meaning behind it

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: curious, reflective, positive (ending)

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*But then we know that what we feel
Remains with us; we can’t conceal
That feelings pose as fact
But then when we know

*BulletB*We tell ourselves that truth is right
This is our human prize
that truth is right,
This is

*BulletR*But sometimes truth will shed no light
Falsehoods appear without a fight
toughest phrase to dissect, I like it...but when I try to figure what it means, I come up short; meaning, the truth doesn't always set free? why not? because we don't understand it? it's easier to believe a lie sometimes? ok.

*BulletV*Our lives become a fine pretence
Perfection’s but a dream
a fine pretence pretense; unclear if this is sarcasm or a defense mechanism or both; our excuse for believing the lie is that there's no such thing as perfection?

A few parting comments...
loved the optimistic ending, just wish for more punctuation when reading poetry, makes it easier to read/flow well

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
72
72
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: amazing group that speaks for itself

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: giving, helpful, loving

*Suitheart* What I liked: the slogan about having only one wing, did you pen that?;
the images that accompany each link is nice, so many angel pics, and like the alternating

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*It's in dropping ...it's in participating
repetition of 'it's in' got old around 4th/5th time, a bullet list might help?

*BulletB*4. Once I join, what am I expected to do?
perhaps it's not in the spirit of the group and/or maybe it's just too much work, but is the group list updated periodically to only reflect current and active members? I think that may help build more unity/...not 'exclusivity' but I think it strengthens the value/reach of the group when members are expected to at least be active is some form/fashion w/in the past year

A few parting comments...
4.5 in style, 5 10 in heart

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
73
73
Review of Reality  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!
Congrats on being featured in this weeks spiritual newsletter!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook:

*Pencil* Storyline:

*Tiedye4* Characters:

*Home* Setting:

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone:

*Telephone* Dialogue:

*Suitheart* What I liked:

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*


*BulletB*


*BulletR*


*BulletV*


*Bullet*


*BulletG*


*BulletB*


*BulletR*


*BulletV*


*Bullet*


A few parting comments...


Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Image #1964011 over display limit. -?-
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
74
74
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hey!
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!
Congrats on being featured in this weeks contests newsletter!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: congrats on creating a cute/simple/and concise seasonal activity!

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: festive, 'rigid' in the sense that rules are clear, fun

*Suitheart* What I liked: the openness of the genre and simplicity of the rules

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*Santa, Elves, or Reindeer,
don't like the story HAS to have one of these three, for instance, if the story didn't have to be new I would have submitted
 
STATIC
Christmas Stray  (ASR)
Use: tram, city-center, tree filled with lights, irritated, heart broken Winner!WC113012
#1906143 by A*Monaing*Faith
yet it doesn't mention either of the three

A few parting comments...
you could probably give me pointers on how to make my contest better next year! great job "AFaith's Unofficial Account BDay Event" 

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Image #1964011 over display limit. -?-
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
75
75
Review of Choices  
Review by A*Monaing*Faith
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!

*Xmastree* *Candycaner* *Stockingb*Welcome to WdC Power Reviewer's December Sleigh-Raid *Xmastree* *Candycaneg* *Stockingb*
*Stockingb* *Xmastree* *Candycaneg* *Stockingr*WDC-PR would like to wish eyestar~* *Xmastree*a VERY HAPPY ANNIVERSARY *Candycaner* *Stockingb* *Xmastree* *Candycaner*


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: most effective use of the prompt!

*Pencil* Theme: choices....

*Tiedye4* Speaker(s)/Flow: flowed well

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone/Mood: solemn, poor, weighty

*Suitheart* What I liked: at first I thought the parents made the right choice; and depending on what the mortality rates were before they sent him off I still kind of think they made the right choice.....

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*There was an awkward silence as the two looked at each other until was broken by the boarding announcement.
as the two looked at each other until it was broken by

*BulletB*saw the tears whelming in his father’s eyes.
saw the tears welling in his father’s eyes.

*BulletR*“Life is about choices,” she said in a shaky voice. “I hope you can live with the responsibility of yours. I don’t know how I can.”
wooow, harsh

*BulletV*The doorbell rang. It was never answered.
The next day the doorbell rang.

A few parting comments...
could do with a going over but your point came across very clear

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
** Image ID #1964981 Unavailable **
** Image ID #1964982 Unavailable **
** Image ID #1965196 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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