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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/andy78
Review Requests: OFF
452 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
1
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Hi PattyPags ,

*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*


I chose to review your item today as I found it on the Read a Newbie page.

*BulletB* Title: Your title tells us exactly what your item is about, but it does what it needs to.

*BulletB* First impression: This gave me a giggle. You put forth a very funny look at the U.S. Senate and lawmaking in general.

*BulletB* General impressions: Oh yes! How simple the world would be if words were spelled how they sounded *Laugh*

I like the light tone of your piece. It feels like a "Six o'clock news" type thing. It flows well, and I like how you have "interviewed" a variety of people, and even included a young boy and a former president.

It feels like a genuine news item as you have provided something of both sides of the argument.

You do need to check the final paragraph though. You have a couple of half-finished sentences. Also you mention "GND" - I'm not sure if this is a real thing or if you are talking about the New Grammar Deal. If it's the later, then you have the abbreviation wrong; it should be NGD, not GND.

*BulletB* Favourite quotes:

*Starfishv* She also advocated for combining both "affect" and "effect" into one single word because no one actually knows the difference between the two.


This line is just brilliant. It perfectly sums up the basis of the entire piece.

*BulletB* Line by line suggestions: You pretty much have your spelling, grammar, and punctuation down pat, but there are a couple of errors that should be picked up on a final readthrough. These are included in the dropnote below. Your original work is in black, specific suggestions are in indigo, and additional notes/explanations for the change are in orange.

Line by line suggestions

*BulletB* Closing remarks:

Overall, it was an enjoyable item, and one I'm glad to have come across.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


Andy~~getting back to WDC


Come on in and join the fun!

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Four time Quill winner!
#1300305 by Maryann


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Marcus Silverman ,

*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*


I chose to review your item today as I found it on the Read a Newbie page.

*BulletB* Title: I like the title. It creates a nice visual of what your satire is all about.

*BulletB* First impression: This had me laughing. You've done a really nice job of what you have set out to do.

*BulletB* General impressions: You open with the stark fact of the crime rate in the U.S., and the shocking amount of money that goes to the penal system. This is the platform that your piece builds on, and it is a clever opening. It kept this reader wanting to read on.

You draw a lot of parallels between prison life and astronaut life, and I like the way how you bring Australia's origins into your piece.

Your item has a smooth flow to it, and it keeps the reader engaged. You move from point to point seamlessly, and you manage to maintain the humorous side all the way through.

*BulletB* Suggestions: N.A.S.A. should be NASA. There are no periods in the spelling of NASA. It is regraded as an acronym, not an initialism, despite the fact that it is made up of the initial letters of the administration. Acronyms can be pronounced as a word, and therefore do not have periods.

You may also want to give some thought to double spacing your paragraphs. It just makes it easier to read. You can do this by editing your item, and scroll down to the Advanced section. You will find a dropdown called Paragraph Spacing.

*BulletB* Closing remarks: Although your piece is all done somewhat tongue in cheek, it could probably get some bureaucrat somewhere thinking about the possibilities.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


Andy~~getting back to WDC


Come on in and join the fun!

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Four time Quill winner!
#1300305 by Maryann


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
3
3
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi ♥hOOves♥ ,

I'm here with your "I Write in 2018 review.

I like how your poem is personal. You've taken one small part of your day and wrote a poem centred around it. Feeding our pets is something very personal, and every owner has their own approach and rituals.

The title is clever, and references one of Boo's favourite type of apple. This is a nice way to further personalise the poem.

Your opening line is lovely. The idea of "basset hound days" being the lazy days of summer is a nice tie to the dog days of summer, which are sultry and uncomfortable and where nobody wants to do anything.

Wishing you the best of luck completing I Write 2018.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


Simply Positive Reviewers signature.
4
4
Review of Guardians  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi StephBee ,

*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


I chose to review your item today as part of my tasks at "The Great PDG Race - Closed.

When someone is browsing through a port, the title is usually the first thing that grabs a reader's attention. I really like your title, as it does a great job of describing angels without immediately giving away what your poem is about.

It invokes the literal idea of guardian angels, but it also alludes to the ideas of angels as guardians of heaven and also guardians against our own human weaknesses (such as temptation or a lack of patience).


I love reading form poetry, and you have done a great job with your kyrielle.

It conforms to all of the requirements of the form, but I think you have made an excellent choice in your refrain. The syllable count in each line is the easy part of writing a kyrielle, but it's the refrain that really sells the poem.

Your refrain not only constantly reinforces the theme of your poem, but it also helps to show the beliefs of the narrator. I particularly enjoyed hearing the repetition of "Angel, Angel" when I read poem aloud.


I love the heavy use of consonance in your poem, but I especially enjoyed the sounds of the unexpected consonance that occurs between the "s" and "z". It creates a smooth reading cadence and adds a melodic undercurrent to your kyrielle.

I like the way how each stanza describes a different aspect of an angel, adding a new layer to the image being created in the reader's mind.

Although the metaphor of a dove as an angel is nothing new, I still liked seeing it. It gives your poem a feeling of familiarity, of something that the reader can connect to. Sometimes using your own metaphor is the way to go, but if the metaphor is so "out there", then you risk losing your reader.

It was a pleasure to read your poem this poem, and I hope you enjoyed your WDC anniversary.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


PDG signature


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
Review of Reading List 2014  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi very thankful ,

I'm reviewing your item as it came up on the read & review.

I love reading member's lists. They allow us to get to know something about the author.

You have read a nice mix of books here, but I've got to admit that I've only heard of about half the books on your list.

I love Stephen King and Edgar Allen Poe. I've read most of King's books, but I still haven't gotten around to reading Black House. Personally, I prefer Poe's poetry to his stories.

I hope you managed to read just as eclectic mixtures of books every year since.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


Simply Positive Reviewers signature.
6
6
Review of Tricks  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Jellyfish~Locked Down! ,

I'm here with a review for "I Write in 2018

I'll be honest up front, I'm not totally sure what your poem is about. I assure you that it is entirely me not getting it rather than anything about your poem.

I've come away thinking it's about either what the passage of time does to our memories or the effects of dementia or a mental health issue - so please do tell me if I'm wrong.

The lines about shadows and darkness bring to mind of someone losing their memories - this is where I get the impression of senility or old age from. There is also the "Photos scattered on the floor" - this suggests someone who is becoming confused, either with reality or their memories.

The closing stanzas paint a very bleak picture. The "Empty rooms" reinforce the theme of someone who is losing their memories.

Wishing you the best of luck with I Write!

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


Simply Positive Reviewers signature.
7
7
Review of Wonderland  
In affiliation with The Dark Society  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Jeff ,

A "The Dark Society Review!


I chose to review your item today to celebrate your birthday.

I really enjoyed your poem. I liked the way you captured the theme of Alice in Wonderland, without drawing in a load of the characters to tell your story.

The kyrielle sonnet is a nice choice for your poem. It limits the length of your poem, and this has helped you to focus on what Alice was all about. You made an excellent choice with regards the B refrain, as it reinforces the crux of your poem.

The kyrielle sonnet form is a syllabic count form, but you have created a smooth and melodic flow to your poem. I love your opening line - you have made excellent use of alliteration, and it serves as a great welcome to the poem.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


Andy~~getting back to WDC


For all group members


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hi ★𝒦𝓇𝓎𝓈𝒽𝒶★ ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


*BulletB* First impression:

I loved your sonnet of Romeo and Juliet. It's a lovely tribute to probably the most famous lovers in literature.

*BulletB* General impressions:

Your sonnet conforms to all the conventions of the form, and the iambic pentameter holds throughout. This is a nice example of using an appropriate form for the subject of the poem.

You make nice use of consonance, assonance, and some alliteration to add melody to the cadence of your meter. I particularly enjoyed finding some unexpected consonance in places, such as with "chance was this" (the soft c is something that doesn't leap from the page, and so is a nice surprise when reading).

You do a wonderful job of telling their story from start to finish, and I like how you close with two of the most well-known lines from any Shakespeare play.

*BulletB* Favourite quotes:

*Scallopv* Forever now immortalized in art.


The story of these lovers is not only in Shakespeare's play, but there are paintings, drawing, and numerous sculptures devoted to the couple. This line sums up the impact they continue to have on modern art.

*BulletB* Closing:

This a truly wonderful sonnet, and it is clear to see why an Awardicon graces it. You get a rare five stars from me.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Review of One Way Ticket  
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Hyperiongate ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


I love the concept of your micro-fiction. You manage to tell a clear story in less than fifty-five words, and this is really hard to do.

Great micro-fiction relies on choosing a subject or theme that a lot of people can either relate to or easily understand.

Although every series and film does it differently, The idea of space travel is something that most people are familiar with: from Fireball XL5, through Battlestar Galactica, Star Trek, Babylon 5, and so on.

People may be unfamiliar with folding space and probability chambers, but when Star Trek came out in the 1960s, everyone had never heard of a warp drive or dilithium crystals, but fans simply accepted they were needed to make the ship go.

I like how you have given your character a name. It helps to personalise his plight, and is a clever way to engage your reader given the brevity of the story. It actually makes us care that he can't get home.

You have ended your flash piece on a "What now" moment. Most flash stories end this way, and it means the reader can make of your story's future what they will.


*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
10
10
Review of Marching Orders  
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hi Jeff ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!



*BulletB* First impression:

I enjoyed your poem. It gives a stark view (no GoT pun intended) of the distance between those issuing the orders, and the troops on the front line carrying them out.

*BulletB* Form:

I'm a huge fan of form poetry, and I especially love those with refrains.

Your rondelet follows the prescribed form, rhyme scheme, and refrain pattern.

You have made an excellent choice of refrain, as it reinforces the crux of your poem.

*BulletB* General impressions:

Orders for the front line often come from way back at headquarters, and this is hammered home throughout your poem. I like the way how you make this poem more about the men and women who are on the front line carrying out those orders, than those faceless generals conducting the war.

There is nice use of consonance and some alliteration to create a steady reading pattern. There is minimal punctuation, but when you use it, it is used correctly and effectively.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
11
11
Review of Soldiers  
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi Pat ~ starting a new journey ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!



*BulletB* First impression:

Despite the dark tone of your poem, I found it captivating.

*BulletB* Form:

You have used the original Craig Tigerman Pleiades form (a septet, where each line starts with the same letter as your one word title, and there is no fixed meter or rhyme requirement), and your poem conforms to the requirements.

Personally, this is my favourite version of the form, although I have written several Pleiades using Hortensia Anderson's variation, where each line of the septet is limited to six syllables. The six syllables symbolises the fact that only six of the seven sisters are clearly visible, whilst the seventh is nearly invisible to the naked eye.

*BulletB* General impressions:

Your poem makes excellent use of consonance to create a smooth reading flow. I also like the use of enjambment throughout.

You have done a great job of focusing on one aspect of the effects of war. You have gone with the potential psychological impact that being in a warzone can cause. This is not something I have very often, but you have crafted a wonderful poem around it.

*BulletB* Favourite lines:

*Scallopv* succumbing to the
savagery of their experiences,

These lines are consonance heavy, and it creates an eerie tone when read aloud. The use of the word succumbing is a nice way to show how the effects of war can be subtle, yet overpowering.


*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
12
12
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi PurplePrincess ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


I am reviewing your story as part of eyestar-Go raiders 's Friend and Foe task #6

*BulletB* First impression:

You have a nice start to a romance story here. You made a nice use of the prompt provided by the Wheel of Torture.

*BulletB* General impressions:

I like the interaction between Lina and Raven. It is friendly and relaxed, and their dialogue feels natural for younger adults.

The start of your story sets up the bar scene and helps to establish the overall mood of the piece. Your POV is consistent, and I detected no head-hopping.

Your story flows smoothly, and the dialogue and action both help to move the story along at a quick pace.

*BulletB* Line by line suggestions: These are included in the dropnote below. Your original work is in black, specific suggestions are in indigo, and additional notes/explanations for the change are in orange.

Line by line suggestions

*BulletB* Closing remarks:

I assume the book item link at the end is supposed to be a link to Mona's story. You might want to check the item number as is has linked to a different member.

Despite the suggestions above, you have a string start here and is still worthy of the 4 stars I have given it.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
13
13
Review of Wheel of Torture  
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Gaby ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


*BulletB* First impression:

This is a brilliant addition to the Game of Thrones family, Gaby. It gives everyone a chance to do something other than the daily genre reviews.

*BulletB* General impressions:

There is a nice mix of activities that players can end up doing. There are writing tasks, reviewing tasks, and even tasks where we get to interact with the WDC community. Like many, I do little else during GoTMonth, but take part in your crazy affair. I've even put my popular Around the World in 52 weeks on hiatus for this extravaganza.

There are some easy tasks, but also a few really scary ones. I hope none of the Newbies to GoT get scared off if they roll one of the stinkers.

*BulletB* Favourite parts:

It has to be the sheer luck of the draw. Some players have been lucky to get one of the freebies (points for doing nothing at all), but even when players do get something to do, it might be over very quickly (like my friend and foe roll with Hannah).

I pity the poor players who end up with task number 22 from the Friend & Foe Torture Chamber: "The Shameless "Plug" Page" is full of review requests! Fulfill them all, separately. *Smirk* ~ 15000 points each team

It's looks OK on the surface, but it will really force some people outside of their reviewing comfort zone - especially the LGBT and 18+ items.

*BulletB* Suggestions:

Really only one. Please open Doom of Valyria and Reek torture chambers *Laugh*

*BulletB* Closing remarks:

This newest additions shows just how much effort you put into your own GoT prep - something we don't always get to appreciate. I personally think you are onto something of a winner with this item.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
14
14
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Paul D ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


I really enjoyed your piece of flash fiction.

Your title is eye-catching and very appropriate for your story. Most of the time, readers are just skimming the site looking for something to read, and a clever title is often the only thing that will draw them into reading your story.

Although not explicitly stated in your story, I get the impression that your scientist is Frankenstein. I love the idea of the steam-driven brain.

Your story moves along at a nice pace, and your dialogue moves the action along. The concept of a machine being made so much like a human that it doesn't even realise it is a robot is innovative.

The ending brings to mind classic films such as the Terminator series, where mankind's own genius eventually turns on its creator. Your closing line is a clever way to close out your story - it gives your story a feeling of completeness, but it also leaves plenty of scope for continuing the story.

I didn't notice any grammar or punctuation errors, and so your story gets full marks from me.


*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
15
15
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Jeannie ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


Thank you for your support of my contest with all of your various entries, Jeannie.

I enjoyed your China crossword, and it was a well-deserved first place win.

Your crossword has a wonderful mix of facts about China, and they are more than just the bog standard history and geography stuff - that's the main reason your item won first place. This is exactly the kind of thing I was hoping my contest would inspire. There is far more to a country than what we get fed by the media, and you have laid China out for us on plate.

I attempted your crossword and only got about of the answers. If it weren't for GoT, I'd spend the next half and hour filling in the gaps.

I like that you have made use of the "Your writing goes here" box at the head of the page - too many people just write "Quiz", "Crossword", or something like this. The extra few facts you include, as well as one of your recognisable images, gives your crossword a welcoming feel.

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
16
16
Review of The Witch Hunt  
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi Kodan Wolf ,

A "Game of Thrones House Martell Review!


*BulletB* Title: I like stories about witches and witch hunts, and so your title caught my attention.

*BulletB* First impression: You have written an enjoyable piece of flash fiction. It's a nicely crafted clash of good versus evil.

*BulletB* General impressions: Your story moves a long at a nice pace and contains a lot of action. There is very little dialogue, but that fits with a fight scene.

I like the descriptions of the Chaos Marauder. They really help to create a visual of this demonic creature.

*BulletB* Line by line suggestions: These are included in the dropnote below. Your original work is in black, specific suggestions are in indigo, and additional notes/explanations for the change are in orange.

Line by line suggestions

*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On! *Shield2*


*Shield7* Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell

GoT banner

Game of Thrones  [13+]
Will return one day ~ until then ~ Thank you all who've participated!
by Gaby
17
17
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Lonewolf ,

*BulletB* First impression:

I was rummaging through your port looking for something to review, and I stumbled across this awesome-looking activity and had to have a peak.

It appears as though this is on hiatus, but I wanted to leave a review regardless.

I'm a big coffee drinker (can't start the day without a large lattee), and the title drew me in immediately.

*BulletB* General impressions:

I love the graphics and use of coffee-coloured browns and yellows. They all create the feel of a coffee shop. The forum dividers further reinforce this motif,

Your shop has an amazing array of packages from the simple short coffee (two poetry reviews), to the more complex Double Chocolaty Chip Frappuccino (which includes a mix of reviews, MB, Sig shop gift, and raffle tickets).

I took a peak at the associated sub-forums. The deluxe packages forum is visually appealing, and the banner at the head of the page is amazing. You have compiled some alluring packages. I also like that you allowed people to place anonymous orders - great for those Secret Santa, Anniversary/Birthday wishes, or just a simple "Just Because".

You offer Gift Certificates as well. This is a nice touch, as it can be difficult to know what another member might like in terms of a review package or an MB/Awardicon/reviews bundle.

All of your prices are reasonable for what was on offer. I'd probably go bankrupt very quickly if this was still active.

*BulletB* Favourite parts:

I love how your shoppers can customise their drinks order with coffee shop classics such extra shots (worth a Merit Badge or Awardicon), extra syrups (worth a Sig shop gift cert), and cakes and muffins (worth cNotes or extra reviews).

*BulletB* Closing remarks:

With both Power Reviewers and SAJ review shops on an indefinite hiatus since at least January last year, I'm surprised members have not returned to your coffee shop asking if you were still taking orders.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


PDG signature
18
18
Review of Early Summer  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Mouser ,

I chose to review your item today for the Power Reviewers Summer Review Raid.

Your Haiku captures a quintessential summer's day.

It's easy to see the whole scene your poem creates - the children playing in a dew-soaked field or meadow with the sun beaming down on them. Many of the haiku I've read seem to focus on one tiny aspect of a much larger picture, but I like how you have managed to include the entire scene without your Haiku feeling cluttered or confused.

Although not required in Haiku, I like the melodic reading quality created by your use of consonance with the letter "s" (especially the unexpected "dual consonance" z-sound created by "seems" and "pause"), and the assonance between "green" and "seems".

I like the use of the phrase "seems to pause", as it really does feel like the sun never goes away during those long hot summer days. This also helps to personify the sun, as though it has physical control over its actions.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


Andy~GoT Prepping


Summer Fun shared image

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Four time Quill winner!
#1300305 by Maryann
19
19
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi ,

Thank you for your entry in "Around the World in Fifty-Two Weeks. I'm here with a brief review.

Thank you for sharing for so much of America in your essay.

I have to agree about the Pilgrims. They fled England and Europe to escape the religious persecution and just took all of their own intolerances with them to the New World.

You have included a number of interesting tidbits of information - I for one did not know that only one horse survived Custer's Last Stand.

I like that you ended your essay with some personal details about where you have lived.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
20
20
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Prosperous Snow ,

Thank you for your entry in "Around the World in Fifty-Two Weeks. I'm here with a brief review.

I really liked your essay. You have taken an important event in your faith and shared it with the WDC community. I'll be honest, yours is not a faith I am familiar with, beyond the name, so thank you for introducing me to it.

I like that you have included footnotes in your essay, as this not only shows that you have researched your essay but also gives your essay a formal look. You have also correctly centered the media extract, further lending to a formal feel and read.

I only noticed one minor error: "A tugboat, carrying several reports" should be "A tugboat, carrying several reporters".

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
21
21
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Azrael Tseng ,

*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*


Thank you for your entry in my "Around the World in Fifty-Two Weeks contest.

I like how you have written something detailed in the header box of your crossword. There are so many members, even ones who have been here for years, who would just put something like "America Crossword" or even only "Crossword" in that box. You have provided some really interesting facts that help to explain the direction you have taken with your crossword.

Your crossword shares some cool tidbits of knowledge, and was a nice take on the prompt. I had no clue as to most of the answers, and relied on working out the answers from the three clues I knew. But what do you expect from a Brit *Laugh*

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


Simply Positive Reviewers signature.
22
22
Review of haiku #20170328  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi SOOKDEO ,

*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*


Your haiku is very vivid. I can easily see the change of the season from winter to spring.

I like your use of the word "muffled". It captures the idea that winter doesn't kill off nature, just that nature is subdued and unheard. This ties in really well with the "mute butterflies".

I love the thunderstorms we get here in the UK during spring. They have just right amount of terror in them to give spring a good wake up call, without doing too much damage - unlike the crazy storms I've seen they get in America.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


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23
23
for entry "Gray Amber
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi CJ Reddick ,

Thank you for your entry in "Around the World in Fifty-Two Weeks. I'm here with a brief review.

I loved this short story. You have done a nice job of dramatising the relationship between Poe and Melville.

I liked the way you have woven in the Mocha Dick inspiration, and I particularly liked the way how you have clearly done your research into the lives you have chosen to dramatise.

I have just one comment regarding punctuation. When you interrupt speech with an action like you do in the sentence “I've been better,” she moved across the room to pick up her baby, “but I'm healthy and Malcolm’s healthy, so not all is bad." you should use em dashes to split the speech and not commas. It should look like this: “I've been better”—she moved across the room to pick up her baby—“but I'm healthy and Malcolm’s healthy, so not all is bad."

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
24
24
for entry "Gray Amber
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi CJ Reddick ,

Thank you for your entry in "Around the World in Fifty-Two Weeks. I'm here with a brief review.

I loved this short story. You have done a nice job of dramatising the relationship between Poe and Melville.

I liked the way you have woven in the Mocha Dick inspiration, and I particularly liked the way how you have clearly done your research into the lives you have chosen to dramatise.

I have just one comment regarding punctuation. When you interrupt speech with an action like you do in the sentence “I've been better,” she moved across the room to pick up her baby, “but I'm healthy and Malcolm’s healthy, so not all is bad." you should use em dashes to split the speech and not commas. It should look like this: “I've been better”—she moved across the room to pick up her baby—“but I'm healthy and Malcolm’s healthy, so not all is bad."

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!

Andy~~getting back to WDC


For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
25
25
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi BlueMoon ,

I'm here with a review for "a very Wodehouse challenge.

Your letter speaks a lot about the bonds of family. At a time when someone is diagnosed with cancer, they rely on their family more than ever. It's one of the ties that bind, even if you are not especially close.

Being diagnosed with cancer doesn't just impact on the person, it also impacts on those around them. Everything becomes about the cancer, but as your letter shows, it is important to keep in mind that life goes on. Breast cancer is not the be all and end all of lives anymore.

It's natural to question what will come, what the future holds, and it also typically causes us to question our own mortality. I do like how you have kept your letter about your cousin, and that you generally keep the tone of your letter positive.

You provide a positive picture of your cousin, and I'm sure if she ever read this letter, it would give her the courage to fight.

I hope she is now well.

Thank you for sharing this item! Please keep on writing!


Andy~~getting back to WDC


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