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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/arogers270
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14 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
Review of Horror House  
Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Nice story. Saw a few typos, but I liked it a lot. What really caught me was the way you included so many of your personal thoughts. They were more like opinions of what you thought about certain situations, and added an extra side to your character. Very, very good!
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Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
WHAT A STORY!!! I love it so much. The tension barometer was pegged the whole time. It goes to show you that you can't judge a book by it's cover.

I only saw one typo:
The youth hesitated. “I said what do you thing you’re doing, you piece of scum?”

I think you wanted:
The youth hesitated. “I said what do you think you’re doing, you piece of scum?”

Other than that, you should try to publish that in a newspaper or something. In today's social atmosphere, something like you story is really needed. Thankx for sharing!
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Review of The howling wind  
Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Kanish,

Not bad for such a short story. The sentence where you turn on the headlights and the cemetery entrance is right in front of you is awesome! I didn't expect that.

I did find a few typos:
It is raining heavily and [I'm] fearing the traffic jam, [so] I take a diversion of[f] the main road.

The following sentence is hard to imagine if it's raining so hard:
I chuckle, as I gleefully speed ahead for a mile or two.

The words 'has' doesn't need to be in this sentence. It changes the tense of the sentence:
The rain has eased off but the wind speed has suddenly increased.
It reads better as:
The rain eased off[,] but the wind speed suddenly increased.

Your last sentence is classic! It would easy to continue this story, but don't do it! I end my horror stories the same way. Leave them hanging in the wind...LOL!!!
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Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
That was some story! The imagery was beautiful. You were spot on!
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Review of The Fun House  
Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Now that is a really good story! I can't find a single thing wrong with it. The (F)un House setting was great. Excellent job!
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Review of The Asylum  
Review by Pernell Rogers
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I must admit I really enjoyed that story, and it even had a happy ending! My mind produced so much imagery and your character descriptions were short and to the point. It was really, really good!
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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/arogers270