|Hello Jade, it's me, Hanna, and I will be reviewing this piece. Congratulations on being part of the NAG Showcase this month!
So the reason I chose to review this piece was because of your description and title. I was hoping it would be a comedy. Some parts were funny, but there were also some other parts that weren't. Like when Fork is talking about the bath and the temperature. I could see that he had a fear of it. You also showed that he had a strong love for his family and friends. I've never written "personIfication"... I think that's the word? But, from what I understand is you give an inanimate object feelings like a human. If so, you completely nailed it. Your story reminded me of Beauty and the Beast, specifically, Chip.
I do have a couple of suggestions and I hope you find them helpful. Please know that I'm not a professional or anything though, so edit or don't edit as you see fit.
1. When Fork is complaining to his dad about taking a bath you wrote at the end, "why can she just wash us by hand?"
I think it's supposed to be "why can't she just wash us by hand?"
2. You forgot the quotation mark before "why" in the same sentence.
3. You wrote "Oh Fork. You know she's an all time homeschooling mom of three kid, aged thirteen."
I think maybe if you changed it to something like, "Oh Fork, you know that she's a full time homeschooling mom of three kids who are thirteen."
4. I just have a question, are the kids triplets? I don't see how they could all be thirteen unless they are.
5. You wrote, "how do humans bath in this temperature?" I think it's supposed to be "bathe", but I could be wrong.
Overall, I think this is a great piece that just needs a little fine tuning.
Thank you for sharing, keep writing, and have a great day!