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345 Public Reviews Given
348 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I enjoy reviewing and try to be as honest as possible. I look for specific things such as technical merit, flow and lyrical quality in poems, creativity, tone, and mood. Though I can be a tough critic, I strive to encourage writers to grow and challenge themselves. I feel that it is through constructive criticism that we grow as writers. I strive to give the writer feedback on the overall impact of the piece. I am the host and judge of the "Shadows and Light Poetry Contest"  and co-host of the "Roots & Wings Contest" 
I'm good at...
I enjoy reviewing poetry, but free form is my favorite. I feel I have a good grasp of the flow and cadence of a piece and can offer helpful suggestions to make a poem flow well.
Favorite Genres
Historical Fiction, Suspense, Fantasy, Sci-fi, Romance
Least Favorite Genres
Erotica
Favorite Item Types
Poetry, Essays, Short Stories
Least Favorite Item Types
Books, Novels
I will not review...
Books, Novels, Chapters
Public Reviews
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Review of Paladin's Oath  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: E | (3.0)
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Hi William E McLean

My name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "Let's help each other grow- Closed" . I want to welcome you to WDC and thought I would give you some feedback on your work. I strive to give honest reviews and I hope you find this review helpful. The following is merely my impressions of your writing. Please make use only of what you feel is relevant to your vision and ignore the rest.

*ButterflyB* Initial Impression: This poem is a nice piece about the longing of youth and inexperience. I like the tone and mood it presents.

*Idea* Theme and Creativity: I like the theme here. It shows the process required to grow up and the youth that is eager to do so.

*Pencil* Technique: Your technique is a little rough. The format is stilted and uneven so it doesn't flow like poetry. This could be fixed by changing the placement of your line breaks. For example:

One day, I’ll be strong enough
that I won’t consider myself a weakling.

This puts more emphasis on the opposing words and makes them more dynamic. It will make your piece more powerful.



*Cut* Suggestions: I think that you should find a way to rephrase some of the lines. 'I won't consider myself' lacks poetic grace. Perhaps you could try

One day, I’ll be strong enough
that I won’t be a weakling.

This is just a suggestion and you can try other ways to say it. It is also a bit nit picky and more my preference than technique.

*FlowerV* Final Comments: This poem has a beautiful theme to is and makes a strong statement. It has potential and I think you did a great job showing the way we gain experience and what it can do for us. Keep Writing!



Poetry is very personal and subjective and as the poet, your vision and intent is most important. I find it is through honest and thorough feedback that we grow as writers and my only goal is to help you do so. I hope that you find a home here at WDC. There are so many things to do that it can be a little overwhelming at first, but keep exploring. I have listed some links below that are places for you to find help and support. Please contact me if you have any questions. I would be happy to show you around.


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Review of forgive me  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Rhyssa

My name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I strive to give honest reviews and I hope you find this review helpful. The following is merely my impressions of your writing. Please make use only of what you feel is relevant to your vision and ignore the rest.

*ButterflyB* Initial Impression: This poem is a great look into the way a relationship changes after the first blush of new romance wears off. It is something that many people can relate to.

*Idea* Theme and Creativity: I really enjoyed the theme. It is not one that is overly common, such as love or nature. It is more specific and that makes it more interesting. It also calls our attention to how often we do the same thing. In fact, I'll be right back, I have to call my husband!

*Pencil* Technique: I'm back. Where was I? Oh yes, free verse poetry. I find this type of poetry is very difficult. It is oft attempted, yet rarely achieved. I think your poem is very well done. The line breaks are strategically placed to emphasis the most important words and it makes the poem have a musical, lyrical, feel to it. It was easy to read aloud and I was able to focus on content instead of trying to fit the lines together.

*Cut* Suggestions: I had a hard time understanding two lines in the last stanza. of your love be careful-- /the courtesy I would give any stranger-- It didn't flow as well and it was a little confusing. I'm not sure if you are saying you would be more courteous with a stranger or if you are only doing it because you would do it for anyone. Also, I like the idea in the 3rd stanza but I wonder if you could find more lyrical way of saying it. 'all our sensitive places' is a little too rough and doesn't seem to fit the poetry of the rest of the poem.


*FlowerV* Final Comments: I think this piece is well done and it puts words to the feelings that creep in when we know we are wrong. My suggestions are very nit picky and the poem is fine without them. Great job!




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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey there,

I really like the message of this piece. It seems so simple yet it is so hard to understand. I remember when my sister was grieving for her still-born daughter. She had a friend tell her the she needed to put her mind on everyday things. Stay moving and find the way through by enjoying the little things in life. She said it was the best advice anyone had given her. It's the small things and small decisions that make us who we are.

This is a very thought provoking piece. Good job.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi Krum

My name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I thought I would return the favor and review one of your items. I strive to give honest reviews and I hope you find this review helpful. The following is merely my impressions of your writing. Please make use only of what you feel is relevant to your vision and ignore the rest.

*ButterflyB* Initial Impression:I think this is a light-hearted, fun piece about the things that make up our days.

*Idea* Theme and Creativity:This is a very creative look at how our thoughts seem to follow no specific course and can come be so scattered. Many people will relate to your thought process.

*Pencil* Technique: I'm not sure that there is a set technique here. It cannot be called free form really because it lacks the flow and cadence that makes free form poetry. It feels more like random sentences and there isn't much cohesion.

*Cut* Suggestions:I think you should find a theme that you want to convey. What are you trying to tell us with this poem? What do you want us to get out of it? The randomness of thoughts is good but perhaps you should have one thought that reoccurs throughout the piece. That thought will be the one that will give us your prevailing message.

*FlowerV* Final Comments:I like the idea here and I think it is a snapshot of most of our running thoughts. The commentary shows us the some of the poet's personality traits and gives us an idea of his age and attitudes. A very interesting read.



Poetry is very personal and subjective and as the poet, your vision and intent is most important. Please feel free to contact me if you make any changes. I'd be happy to read it again.


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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, My name is Angels in my Ear reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . Your title and description caught my attention so I decided to read on. While I am only 38 I have been married for 20 years. When our anniversary came, I found myself thinking about those many, hard earned years and when the march of time would begin to show more boldly. I love your piece because it shows uncertainty and vulnerability. I would never get the breast enhancement my husband jokes about. But there are days when the thought sneaks in. Your piece makes me ask myself if I truly know the answer. I am feeling the progress of life and while still young, my age does not comfort me. Your piece shows me where I am going and how some of my long held opinions can change with time. Very thought provoking.

I always try to offer suggestions in my reviews. I think your piece is fine as is so these are only academic. While i felt your struggle with time, i wasn't sure about your objection to the procedure. You spend a lot of time on your feelings about your aging so it seems it would be your solution. I would try spending a little more time on why you objected in your youth. Did you know someone who did it and what was you opinion at the time? A specific example might illustrate your conflict more strongly and provide a great contrast.

Overall this was a fun and interesting piece and I enjoyed it.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

         *ButterflyB* Initial Impression *ButterflyB* I liked the message of this poem. Probably because I am that " lazy wife" I've actually had that same argument a time or two.


         *Idea* Theme and Creativity *Idea* This poem is very easy to relate to and will be a good reminder to a lot of people to value their spouses.


         *Pencil* Technique: *Pencil* I had a few problems with the format of this poem. The rhyming stanzas do not follow a consistent pattern. You began with aabb for a few stanzas but then broke away to one line stanzas. I also did not feel the dialogue fit. Because you had to match the meter and rhyming lines up, the dialogue feels forced and unlikely. People do not speak the way they do in your poem and it made the characters less sympathetic and too formal. But that is probably just my preferences talking rather than a technical issue.


         *Cut* Suggestions *Cut* I think your last two lines are great but they cannot carry the poem. It might work better if it was told from the 1st person passive POV. If you want to relay the message more clearly this could make great short story instead.


         *FlowerV* Final Comments *FlowerV* Although it has some issues I enjoyed it overall. It was very interesting and your plot kept us reading. Good job.


Please remember, these are just observations and suggestions. Poetry is very personal and subjective and as the poet, your vision and intent is most important. Please feel free to contact me if you make any changes. I'd be happy to read it again.


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Review of I long to be  
Review by Angels in my Ear
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi lee. ,

My name is Angels in my Ear and I am a judge for the
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by A Guest Visitor
I have had the pleasure of reviewing your entry and I hope my comments prove helpful to you.

         *Idea* Theme and Creativity *Idea* This poem does good job following the prompt for this contest. It expresses desire without being vulgar and makes it a beautiful thing.

         *Pencil* Technique: *Pencil* The poem flows nicely. The line breaks are chosen well and help to create the cadence that is required in free form poetry. A few of the lines might work better if they were broken into smaller pieces. However, it does not detract from the poem.

         *Cut* Suggestions *Cut* The word choices in this poem were a bit strange. I found that some of them did not fit into the poetic tone of the poetry. The words that didn't fit for me were relish, fancy, lust, diligent, cuddle, and inclination. While they all describe your feelings they didn't seem fold into the poem. It felt as if you had used a thesaurus and chosen them from the results. They took away from the overall soft and sensual feel you were trying to create.

         *FlowerV* Final Comments *FlowerV* I liked this poem in general and feel you have a good grasp on what makes free form poetry work. It was heartfelt and pensive. You worked in the prompt well. It did not feel as if it was forced in to meet the requirement but felt natural. Good Job.



Thank you for your entry in this contest. I have enjoyed reading your piece and hope you will enter again in the future. I would be very interested to see what you can do with the next prompt. Good luck with you entry.

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Review of To My Love  
Review by Angels in my Ear
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi,

My name is Angels in my Ear and I am a judge for the
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by A Guest Visitor
I have had the pleasure of reviewing your entry and I hope my comments prove helpful to you.



*NoteB*First Impression: This is a heartfelt piece about the effect love can have on a lost soul. It has a tone of discovery and we feel the poet's wonder and awe.


*NoteG*Use of Theme and creativity:Although there is an understood trust that comes with love, I would have liked to see more of an emphasis on trust specifically to go with the theme for the month. You did do a nice job of working in the prompt and making it your own.


*NoteO*What I liked:I enjoyed your references to a maze and to your journey through it. It was seen throughout the piece which gave us a better reference for the feeling you wanted to portray besides the cliches that are commonly seen. I think a little more imagery would be nice. I want to see the cave so I can feel your despair more deeply.


*NoteR*Technique: you did a good job with this format. Line breaks can be tricky in free form and you placed them well. It still was a bit choppy upon reading aloud but it had a good cadence to it.


*NoteV*Overall Impression: I enjoyed this poem. It is nice and reflects the feelings of the author well. While it is expressive it needs something more specific to cement it in our memory. What can make it stand apart from other poems about love? This was a lovely piece. Good job.

Thank you for your entry in this contest. I have enjoyed reading your piece and hope you will enter again in the future. I would be very interested to see what your work on the next prompt. Good luck with you entry.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: This is a well written descriptive poem that puts the reader in the scene with you


*Star*Theme and Creativity: There seems to be only one theme here of the experience of the moores.

*Star*Technique: Although this poem is short it does a good job of capturing the cadence and flow of free form poetry. It is easy to read aloud and puts emphasis on the right words.


*Star*Suggestions: This poem needs some direction. We can see the moors with you but so what? What do you want us to know or feel? I would not have known you were on the moors if it weren't in your title. Also, try to use new phrasing. tolling of bellsis cliche. How else can bells sound?


*Star*Overall Impression: This is a good start for a poem. You used the sense of hearing as well as sight to show us your setting. I would like to see more of this piece. Give us some action or thoughts of the poet.


I am also a writer learning as I go and I hope I have been helpful in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: This is a very heartfelt poem with a message of peace and comfort. It leaves me feeling loved and safe.

*Star*Theme and Creativity: I like the idea of angels singing the poet to sleep so she is not afraid of the dark and feels love and acceptance.

*Star*Technique: The flow of this poem is off. Although free form does not follow any strict rules it must still have a natural cadence to it. It should follow natural speech patterns. I feel it would flow better if the line breaks were different. I would try putting and at the beginning of the lines since our natural speech pattern is to pause before the word. At the end it puts too much emphasis on an unimportant word.

*Star*Suggestions: I would like to see more about the angels. You only mention them once. I want to hear them. Not just their words but their harmony and beauty. Why does it make you feel loved? Is it only the words they say? The words are generic but powerful if we hear them coming from celestial lips. Why are they singing to you now? Are you afraid, struggling, or in despair? Is this common or a new experience? I would like to see less statements of feelings and more descriptions so I can feel it too.

*Star*Overall Impression: I like the idea behind this poem. Angels singing us to sleep is a comforting thought. I hope that I can hear them too. Thank you for an inspiring piece.

I am also a writer learning as I go and I hope I have been helpful in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review of The Other World  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi, My name is Angels in my Ear reviewing for "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" . I am happy to read your work and hope that my review can help you in some way.

*Star*Initial Impression: This piece has an ethereal quality to it and shows how sometimes our curiosity can lead us into actually getting what we asked for and that it wasn't really what we wanted.

*Star*Character Development: Hari is a very curious character but I would like to know more about him. How old is he? Why does he want to go to a different world? Is it just curiosity or is he trying to escape from something? Is he someone who often daydreams about things or is this an abberition for him that captured his imagination? Is there anything about the neew world that he likes or is it all too foreign or scary? What is it and why? Some of these things may not be pertinent to the story but they may help you to get a clearer picture of Hari's experience and what effect it may have on him. This would help the reader better understand the true impact of this experience.

*Star*Setting: Your story starts out under a tree. I would like to see the tree. Is it knotted, knarled, shady, old? Give us a few descriptive words to put us there with you. Also, I did not have a clear picture that you were in space until it became obvious that you were talking to the moon. I did not know you were an asteroid until the moon said so. See if you can give us descriptions that form the picture and we can figure it out for ourselves based on that. Use all 5 senses. What does the air smell like. What can you hear? Is there grass beneath the tree and how does it feel? Cold or wet? This will truly make us feel like we are in the story with you.

*Star*Plot: I like the subject of this story. We are all curious about different realities and it is fun to see how actually going to one can be like. I'm not sure what you want to say with this story. Is it about learning to be content with what you have? Is it about Hari learning to expand his knowledge and learning that there is more to the world than he thought? Is it meant to be comical or thought provoking? Try to define exactly what you want the reader to feel and take away from this story. Otherwise it is just an interesting story we read once and has no lasting impact.

*Star*Technical Aspects: Although I liked the idea of speaking to the moon and it's loneliness, the dialogue is a little too formal. I would try to make it more conversational. i.e. "Hari, is it not?" Why not just "It's Hari, right?" Much more believable and the way this teacher speaks gives us an insight into his character. There are many ways he could ask this question. Which one he uses tells us his attitude toward his student and is much less sterile.

*Star*Suggestions: Many of your vital plot points are stated outright. The moon just tells him what to think and doesn't let him work it through on his own. I'd like to see Hari put his own interpretation on what is happening instead of just being told. Try not to state everything outright. It makes us work a little harder and makes a more interesting read. What will Hari take away from this experience besides want to leave and come back home?

*Star*Overall Impression: This is a fun and interesting story that makes us pause and wonder how we would react if this were us. It is fun to personify the moon and show us what he would be like if we could talk to him. I feel that the story needs some direction and has a lot of potential. It is original and thought provoking. I'm just not sure which thought you want me to focus on.

As I am also a writer learning as I go, I hope you will take this as my humble opinion and use what you can and ignore the rest. I'm glad that you posted your work and my comments are only meant to improve on the great job you have already done. If you revise it at all, or want me to review it again, I'd be happy to help.

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Review of Time Stops  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: This is an interesting poem about the moment suspeded between life and death. It makes us think about our beliefs and what really happens at that moment.

*Star*Theme and Creativity: allthough death is a common theme, this poem focuses on one particular moment in time and gets away from the generalities usually written about.

*Star*Technique: the rhymes feel a little forced and this slows down the rythym. It seems as if you knew which word you want to end with and then filled in the line to get there. This makes some of the lines a little confusing such as 'lingers, like minnows in a stream' In my mind, minnows don't linger but are always moving. I'm not sure what picture you are trying to present and what you want me to take from it. What are you trying to say?

*Star*Suggestions: you use the word life a lot. In a poem about death it is necessary but I would try to find different ways to refer to it. Also, maybe choose a different focus for each stanza. Each one is saying the same thing but in different words. Maybe one on dying, one on the moment between, and then one on the triumph of death.

*Star*Overall Impression: I like the concept of this poem. Itis a question that everyone wonders about and is very mysterious.But it doesn't seem to have a direction. Are you saying it is all just brain synapses and not spiritual or do you want us to see death as an entity and fear this moment? I think it just needs a little clarification.

I am also a writer learning as I go and I hope I have been helpful in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review of Front Street  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: I like the subject of this piece. It is not often written about like love or death. Very original.

*Star*Technique: This felt like a poem with all the rhymes but it is not in a poetry format. Perhaps you should break it up in stanzas so that it flows more smoothly.

*Star*Suggestions: You do a good job of telling us abut the poets pain and hurt but it is vague about exactly why. I would not have known this was about gossip if I hadn't seen it in your description. I would like to see a stanza that refers to talk or wagging tongues about exactly what it costs the poet specifically besides hurt feelings.

*Star*Overall Impression: A heartfelt piece that speaks of the pain that careless people can cause. Very emotional but vague.

I am also a writer learning as I go and I hope I have been helpful in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review of Rain  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi, My name is Angels in my Ear reviewing for "The Talent Pond" . I was interested in your title and summary and thought I would read further.

*Star*Initial Impression: this piece has a melancholy feel to it. It is lonely and resigned and the author longs to be needed and appreciated. Instead he feels abandoned and is always searching for something just out of reach.

*Star*Character Development: you did a great job of expressing emotion. There are so many different emotions going on for so few words. Very succinct yet descriptive.

*Star*Setting: you talk about many places but could use more descriptive images. (i.e the flat plains, thirsty dessert. Starved mountains) this would give us a feel for why you go there

*Star*Technical Aspects: I liked the line about perpetual tears. It was very lyrical and stood out because of its unique wording. The rest is more straight forward and not as inviting.

*Star*Suggestions:I was confused as to who you are. Rain personified or a man missing a lost love. When you say I wish I could be over you who are you speaking to? And who is O great one? It was a bit too cryptic and a little confusing.

*Star*Overall Impression: The idea is very creative and the comparisons to running from something is interesting. As it is about nature I'd like more visual imagery and maybe references to other senses like sound it makes or the smell in the air. But I like the emotion and concept a lot. A very emotional piece that really conveys the feeling of the author.

As I am also a writer learning as I go, I hope you will take this as my humble opinion and use what you can and ignore the rest. I'm glad that you posted your work and hope that this can help in some way. If you revise it at all, or want me to review it again, I'd be happy to help.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "Invalid Item" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: This was a fun piece that shows how you and your family are close and how you spend time with each other.

*Star*Theme and Creativity: I liked the repetition of My own piece of heaven at the end of each stanza

*Star*Technique: I found this poem read well but it lacked the cadence of a poem. Each line read like a sentence and didn't flow to the next line. However, free form does not follow any strict rule and is lead by the creative mind of the writer

*Star*Suggestions: This work is great at giving the feel of what it's like to be on a boat. But, I feel this would work better as an essay. Then you could expand on the experience instead of bits and pieces in each line.

*Star*Overall Impression: I liked the title and the experience of this poem. It makes us reminisce about our own experiences on the water and helps draw those memories close to us and remember that feeling with you.

As I am also a writer learning as I go and I hope I have been helpful in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: This poem was good at showing the bleakness of winter

*Star*Technique: The flow was good and upon reading it aloud I found no stumbling spots.

*Star*Suggestions: I would like to see another stanza about sprig to balance out all the negatives of winter. It would make us feel more hopeful and make us feel we can endure the many trials of winter.

*Star*Overall Impression: I wasn't sure if I should feel hopeful or depressed by this poem. It is very good at describing what winter is like and people who don't live in cold places will be glad they don't with your great descriptions.

As I am also a writer learning as I go, I hope you will take this as my humble opinion and use what you can and ignore the rest. I'm glad that you posted your work and hope that this can help in some way. If you make any changes, I'd be happy to read it again.

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Review of Thoughts  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: I picked this poem to read because it grabbed my attention as it so closely captured my own frame of mind at the moment and ironically organized my own frazzled thoughts into a cohesive statement of " yes, exactly."

*Star*Theme and Creativity: I especially liked the lines "creeping in slowly, running thru quickly" and "my thoughts are fighting against me"

*Star*Technique: You repeat the word thoughts or have several places where you go to one syllable words. There should probably be spaces to separate these into stanzas.

*Star*Suggestions: Again, This is just my opinion, but might be something to try out. I thought that it is more interesting when we hear your summary and reaction to your thoughts but not your actual thoughts themselves. I want to know that your thoughts are confusing you and that they are making you scattered, but not the actual dialogue you have with yourself. I don't know though. It works either way. I want to know the effect they have. The thought itself is generic and is the same one we all have everyday. Perhaps one or two so we can get the idea but not so many. Focus on the feeling rather than the thought itself.

*Star*Overall Impression: As someone who has just taken up writing again after a long sabbatical, I can feel you frustration as I am in the same boat. I was hoping you had an answer to it dang it! Oh well. Guess we'll both have to use our writing skills to get those thoughts out. I felt your frustration and could relate well. Good job.

Thank you for sharing your work. Please let me know if you change anything. I would love to read it again and I would be interested in your opinion on my work as I can see some similar thought processes going on in our minds.

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Review of The Monster in Me  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: I could really feel the impact of emotion in this poem. I think we have all heard this voice at one time or another and can relate to this well.

*Star*Theme and Creativity: my favorite lines are "always begging for attention" and "it tells me lies". I like that you gave greed a voice and personified it because it truly does come to us as a refrian we tell ourselves

*Star*Technique: free form poetry is one of the worst abused forms I think. To most it means no form no rules. But there must still be a natural cadence and flow to it. You did a great job with this. I read it once silently, then again out loud and found it to flow of the tounge well. For most this is the biggest hurddle so kuddos to you

*Star*Suggestions: I found you used the word hide and hidden a lot. Try to find different words to use. Also you used green twice right next to each other. The piece did not end on a solid note. I liked the use of one syllable words but they weren't strong enough and were too scattered. I thought they should all reference color, or tone or something.

*Star*Overall Impression: I really enjoyed this piece. I think you have talent and did a great job. It was well written and it makes us say "yeah, that's what I mean."

Thank you for sharing your work. Please let me know if you change anything. I would love to see it.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, my name is Angels in my Ear and I'm reviewing for "The WDC Angel Army" . I am happy to offer you my humble opinion and hope you will take it for what it's worth and leave the rest.

*Star*Initial Impressions: I really enjoyed this piece. It was such a great look into the inevitable march of time that we all face. How will we handle it and can we fill the shoes of our mothers? It made me ask myself the same questions and really made me think.

*Star*Theme and Creativity: I liked your use of the word arsenal in the 2nd paragraph. It made me think that it would be fun if you used a war metephor such as doing battle with your arsenal instead of just fight. You could use other such words throught the piece if you wanted to. Maybe. It might be fun.

*Star*Technique: I loved that you started out with dialogue. This drew me in right from the start and is a good way to get a reader's attention. There were a few spelling errors here and there and a few punctuation mistakes but I make them all the time so who am I to hold it against you.

*Star*Suggestions: I did feel like this piece ran a little long. Perhaps you could edit it down a bit. Find places where the information is not vital to your overall message of transformation and edit them down or out. Also in the second paragraph, I would take out the phrase "one must know". It seems out of place.

*Star*Overall Impression:I the think this is a wonderful look into your life. It really made me think which is what good writing is supposed to do. It should make you ask questions you haven't thought to ask before and look inside yourself for the answers.

Thank you for sharing your work. Please let me know if you change anything. I would love to see it.

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Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (3.0)
I'm reviewing your piece as a member of "The WDC Angel Army" 

This was a quick fun read and thank you for sharing it. Your character sounds like some of the people I know! LOL! You did a good job with character development and we were able to get a quick snapshot of this man in a short number of words which is hard to do.

I did find that you tended to switch back and forth between past and present tense a lot which made it very distracting and took away from the flow of your story. For example, in the second paragraph you mention that he ambled yet at the end of the paragraph you used the word viewing rather than viewed. Also, you refer to yourself as the writer when you state "one" in the first sentence. This takes the reader out of the story. Maybe you could tell it as if you were thinking Frans' thoughts in 3rd person.Or something. I'm not sure. I like your idea there though so there's got to be a good way to work it in.

I also like your title. It's kind of cheeky. Great job and keep on writing.

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Review of Wishful thinking  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (3.0)
I am also new here and am only offering my humble opinion so take it for what it is worth and leave the rest. I personally loved the amount of detail you used to describe the scene here. You used all of our senses to place us on that abyss and get our hearts pounding. We could feel the air around us and the earth beneath us.

However, I found the present tense to be very distracting and had a hard time following the action as it was happening. Past tense would make it easier for your readers and is more commonly used. Also, as there is little action in this piece, the action that does exist seems to be done over and over but just rephrased such as taking off clothing, and then taking of other items of clothing. or wind in her hair. Maybe you could find other things she could do or other ways of showing wind in her hair to make this piece stand out more.

But I do think you have a skill for detail hope you contiue to use it.

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Review of Walk  
Review by Angels in my Ear
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a beautiful poem. I love the feel of it. The father is not only giving his daughter the wisdom of his experience but is also seeing her as a person and not as just his child. That is sometimes hard to do as a parent. My daughter is 17 and is a senior is HS so this is very poignant to me. I did find it hard to tell if he is speaking to her directly or just thinking it but it doesn't really matter. Either way I enjoyed it. Great job.

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Review of Know it All  
Review by Angels in my Ear
Rated: E | (4.0)
I loved this poem and I related to it both as a the child I was when I married at 18 and the parent I am now of a 16 year old. Very apt and moving. Beautiful.
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Review of The Gift  
Review by Angels in my Ear
Rated: E | (4.5)
WOW! I loved it. You pulled me right in. It reminded me of one of my favorite series of books called "Poison Study' ( I highly recommend you read them if you haven't. They're right up your alley). You gave just enough info to keep us interested and guessing. Who is Angelo? Where are they going?.It was a great place to start. I usually have a lot of critiques when I read and find most people on here don't know what they are doing but you have talent.

Great Job!!
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Review by Angels in my Ear
Rated: E | (3.0)
I liked the way you showed the fear of acting on new feelings. It is easy to see the longing to move on yet the fear of never getting past the heartache of rejection. I have been told you can never fall in love until you have had your heart broken.

I think adding some punctuation would help the reader to get the poem to flow better. I wasn't sure where to pause and where to read more quickly to make the meter work. The sentence fragments make that hard yet tbey work artistically because no one thinks in full sentences. Feelings are felt in few words.

Nice job
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