Good sentiment, loosely based on Jesus’ words of “Tale up thy cross and follow me..” I enjoyed your short piece. Your word choice was good. I did notice a few typos that you might want to address. Write on!
Great acrostic form. Gives writers pov on the subjects’ lives. Word choice though good seemed stilted at times in effort to adhere to form. All in all was a good read.
Well, what can I say but “The Tail” is quit a tale! A fancy feline fest with the hero winning and avoiding a CATastrophe. Cute concept. Good imagery and word choice.
Interesting story line. Would love to see it expanded. There is so much potential here. However, I felt a little let down. Why did the burglar feel intimidated? I get the “Shining” reference but non-Stephen King fans might not. And, since these twins were non-verbal, they could not utter “Come play with us”.
All in all it was entertaining and left the reader with wanting a little more.
Intriguing short story. Leaves readers wondering and wanting to know more. You might want to proof for spelling-caught an error that auto correct wouldn’t. All in all, I would say “good job “.
I found your poem in the “Read a Newbie” section at WDC. First, let me extend to you a warm welcome. This is a wonderful site in which to showcase your work, and to garner feedback.
I see that this piece was written about 24 years ago. I thought it to be a good example of free verse style. It has a good flow. Your word choice paints a good picture in the reader’s mind. Laughter is a beautiful sound, but sometimes elusive.
Thank you for sharing your talent! I look forward to reading more from you!
Good morning, Zelda, and welcome to WDC! I found your poem in the “Read a Newbie” section of this site.
I am not a learned reviewer, but I do enjoy reading. I thought that your piece was a good read. Your word choice helped to paint a realistic picture in my mind of your fantasy. The flow was smooth.
I love this! I think it’s simplicity and repetition make it a wonderful read. Your faith shines through each stanza! Our God is truly good all the time, and we should praise his magnificent name continually. This piece is a praise for Him, and it has stuck into my head. I will be repeating parts of it all day! LOL!
I found your poem while browsing the Read and Review section here at Writing.com I have to admit, the title drew me in! I think we would all wonder what we would do presented with that dilemma.
I think your free-verse style flowed good. It certainly conveyed your choices of what to do with the time left! I see it was written for a contest. That can be a challenge! I hope you did well.
I came across your poem while browsing the Read a Newbie section of Writing.com. The title piqued my interest, so, I found I had to read and review it.
It appears that you are writing from the heart, about an incident that you experienced. If so, it is a sad tribute to your friend. I have found that people who share the same lifestyles as your late Mr. Brown, often do not listen to the voice of reason. They are hell-bent and headstrong to race down the pathfinder destruction they are on.
Your short free-verse piece tells a powerful story in a concise way. Your word choice is good and lends to your telling of the tale. Good job!
Thank you for sharing your work, and, welcome to WDC!
I found your poem while browsing the Read a Newbie section here on Writing.com. Since I often have trouble with insomnia, it was an intriguing title. I can certainly relate to the situation you describe.
The flow of your piece was smooth. I thought that your word choice was good. You conveyed your point of view to the reader. After all, isn’t that a part of writing?
Thank you for sharing your work! And, welcome to WDC.
I found your poem while browsing the Read a Newbie section here at Writing.com. Your title intrigued me.If you don’t obtain a scar or two on your journey through life, chances are, you haven’t really lived!
Your word choice conveys your emotions in this free-verse piece. Each couplet emphasizes your point of view.
Thank you for sharing your work with us! And, welcome to WDC.
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