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180 Public Reviews Given
227 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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51
51
Review of I Thought  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I thought I'd look over your stuff seeing how you looked over mine. I thought the title of this one interesting. I thought I might share with you that the phenomenon you describe in this piece is one very familiar to me. Countless times I have an entire world ready to go in my head and when I put pen to paper, it is as if I'd pushed some invisible "mute" button and all those grand thoughts vanish. It can even happen mid-write. Perhaps my head is working faster than my hand.

Anyway, I think that you have expressed a very valid commonality with very few lines and you have done a wonderful job of it. Thank you for sharing.
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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: E | (5.0)
River, this is both beautiful and insightful. To think, most people see the lines and the scars and the wrinkles in their faces as something that should be "treated". You have taken a whole new view of them and turned them into something to be proud of. All of our faces silently tell our story. Each is unique. It is not often that someone points out an idea as touching. Excellent work and thank you for sharing.
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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi, J. After reading "My Friend The Salesman" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Very cool. I share your disdain for those who would expect everything to change by doing nothing different. You've woven the theme into an extremely entertaining story.


Favorite Part:I think I liked the constant progression of the tale. You definately had the whole thing figured out before you started writing, marching the reader straight through the storyline and to the end very purposefully.


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Noticed some minor punctuation errors here and there, but I am not one to dwell on technicalities when reading an entertaining piece.


*Bigsmile*Good stuff, J White. You have a very readable style of writing. Thank you for sharing.



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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, Wally, after reading "A Love that could not be" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Very clever how you managed to deceive the reader (this reader, anyway) into thinking of Lisa as the android. Managing subtleties as you have in this piece to achieve your twist is extremely difficult. I can certainly appreciate the thought you have put into this.


Favorite Part:"...he triggered a small, low level correction application...resetting his emotion chip...he was now functioning within accepted parameters." & "Lisa wept."----Loved the contrast of software and raw emotion.


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*I really like this one, Wally. I like it more the more I think about it. If I'm reading more into this than you intended, that is also good work on your part. Excellent work.



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Review of When It Rains  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Nom, After reading "When It Rains" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Excellent stuff. You seem to have the characters very well developed (it is good practice to do this I've found, and makes for easier writing). Love your handle, too.


Favorite Part:I like the way the story comes full circle; "...when it rains in Dahlia county, it really rains." Very tidy, very cool.
I also like some of the descriptives you've chosen: i.e. "...like hugging a concrete buttress."


Suggestions:If you are at all interested, check out
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#1408285 by Not Available.
. It has a lot of the elements that this story's got. Also a very good read.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*Welcome to WDC. If all your stuff is of this caliber, I think you'll find this place very rewarding. Good luck in the contest.



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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi,Robin. After reading "Same Bat Time - Same Bat Channel..." , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:I love this kind of stuff! It's cute, it's got flow, it's light fare and very enjoyable. It's also harder to do than many folks would think. Good job.


Favorite Part:Setting up the cliffhanger at the end. It's a wonderful nod to a campy classic. True to form (after all, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery).


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*Robin, this is really cool. A fine tribute to a ridiculous (in retrospect) memory. If you're inclined, check out
 Invalid Item 
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#1597187 by Not Available.
, it is along the same lines (poems that tell a story). Thank you for sharing.



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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Jolly. After reading "Why Do I Hate You?" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:This is a great piece. It's a sad truth, though, for it to be necessary to foster anger with someone you love to counterbalance the void that exists when they are gone. I have both done this and had it done to me. I hope that people employing this act of self-defense don't lose themselves in the method. I hope they can still remember those things that were good.


Favorite Part:That you answered the question posed in the first stanza. At least you recognize why you are doing what you had to.


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Though important, I don't like to let technicalities inhibit a beautiful message. I found no errors, nor did I look for them.


*Bigsmile*Jolly, you summed up a common reality with brevity and wonderful insight. Kudos to you, and thank you for sharing.



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Review of Pictures  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Christmas Joy. After reading "Pictures" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:I'm not entirely sure what this is about, all told, but I think it is beautiful. The words themselves and the ideas they summon are very enjoyable.


Favorite Part:So many. My favorite part is that so many parts are rife with imagery. Each on their own make this a great piece. "Reality bites, but the movie was good."; "I am everywhere but not at once."; "...because broken heart is the formula for good poetry." Wow. All of these scream to be expanded on. : )


Suggestions:None


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Didn't look


*Bigsmile*Nice work. If everything was this entertaining, I would probably never log off. Excellent work. Thank you for sharing.



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59
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Review of Debt of Time  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,Hyperiongate. After reading "Debt of Time" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Very cool story. Magic, but at a price. Some would make that trade, I'm sure.


Favorite Part:"This was his debt owed. This was the price of real magic."


Suggestions:None. Loved it.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*Did you win with this one? If not, I'd love to know who did. Excellent work. Thanks for sharing.


P.S.: What was the prompt for this one, do you remember?



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Review of The Long Way Home  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Guarrman. After reading "The Long Way Home" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:The way it all started, I was expecting something terrible to happen by the end. That would have made this normal fare. It is refreshing to see the way you went with it, and it makes it a far more poignant story. Good job.


Favorite Part:"...the difference between grounded and not, with a father like mine, wasn't much."; What a great observation!


Suggestions:None


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:


*Bigsmile*Good stuff, fiction or no. Thanks for sharing.



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Review of Treats  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Pony. After reading "Treats" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Very entertaining and cleverly written. An ode to something so utterly commonplace and yet so unendingly popular.


Favorite Part:"A treat that looks, before it melts, like winter curbs along snow belts"; Fantastic!


Suggestions:none


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*I saw this one thrown in with a few others of related content. By far this was the most thoughtful and entertaining. It really was night and day. Good job.




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Review of Zombie Dream  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I'm a big zombie fan, AaronT, and this one has promise (especially if it is just a dream that you wrote down). Love ultra violence. Love gore. Keep on keeping on! Why did you nix your indians and monkeys story? I thought that one was pretty different and entertaining.
63
63
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi,Hyperion. After reading "The Life of Cronkite" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Very entertaining. A departure from the usual entry for a prompt like this. Actually, it was funny as hell, dammit.


Favorite Part:"She was the best thing in his life"..."...Please, please, please don't let it be stew."..."...Tree bark stew."..."Damn."


Suggestions:NA. Loved it.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Missed a couple of commas where there should have been commas (Dam, Girl.), (what are you cooking, Sweetness?); Some things capitalized when they shouldn't have been (Dam, Tree bark...); All of this very minor when a story is as good as this one.


*Bigsmile*Very promising entry, Hyperion. Keep up the good work and best of luck in the contest!



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Review of Haunted  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,Jaya. After reading "Haunted" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Beautiful and creepy. Loved it. Your choice of words works really well in this item


Favorite Part:"Her mansion, like a house forever haunted stood on the deserted grounds, a warning..."


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:If the item strikes me, I don't care to notice any violations of this sort. : )


*Bigsmile*Good work, Jaya. Good luck in the contest.



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Review of Day in Red  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, Elle. After reading "Day in Red" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Wow. What a cool piece. It is hard to write something where the imagery is so all-important and to do it as effectively as you have done here. You describe a few abstract feelings and ideas in beautiful detail. Good job.


Favorite Part:"The wonder just came out of him naturally." ; "To her it was just the roads outside town where that one kid had gotten hit..."


Suggestions:None.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Didn't care to notice. Your story was captivating.


*Bigsmile*I have known people like your Darren. They are the ones I try to keep close and hold dear. I've also known some like Mary. It is hard to accept that there exists such shallowness in people. If Darren is real, he would be proud of you. Keep writing.



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66
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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Rainbowwoman. After reading "Dissolving into the Sky" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Wow. Way to put it out there. Risky subject matter, beautiful prose. I really liked it.


Favorite Part:"When God meets God, our breath carries us to heaven. Our destination is to arrive exactly where we are..."


Suggestions:None


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*I see that you've written this some time ago. I, too have posted old stuff out of curiosity about how it may be received. It's beautiful. I'm glad that you put it out there.




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67
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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Connieann. After reading "My Grandson's Birthday" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Cute poem. I liked the flow of the rhymes. Alot of what is out there tends to stumble in that department. Good work.


Favorite Part:The very last stanza because it speaks to the truth of the matter: We like to make things enjoyable for others (especially kids), but it can be exhausting.


Suggestions:NA


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*A nice poem. Light-hearted, cute. Good luck with the contest.




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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Living. After reading "If I Wasn't Born..." , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Going into it, I was expecting just another gloomy, sad about the world, hating yourself kind of item...What you've written is quite the opposite. I really, really like it. You have a healthy outlook about things and it is refreshing to read your thoughts about them here.


Favorite Part:I like the way you don't explain entirely your cousin's accident; I like the statement "...They would still be good little children, but unhappy good little children."; I also like the way you list everything again before making your final point. It makes the whole thing much more powerful.


Suggestions:Some punctuation issues (i.e. "...brother's swimming fees."; apostrophe in the fifth "If I wasn't born...")...Nothing major to consider. Just proofread.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:see "suggestions"


*Bigsmile*Remember that there may be alot of other bad things to come, but if you keep ahead of them with the good stuff, you'll always have reason to be proud of yourself.




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Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, Escape. After reading "Last Song of the Birds" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:The title had me. Of all the imagery to choose from involving the end of the world, I thought it interesting to focus on the songs of birds. Nice.


Favorite Part:"First man killed man, then man killed men..."; the statement illustrates nicely the escalation of human efficiency in killing one another.


Suggestions:Each stanza has it's own kind of flow (some more so than others), but it seems the piece would be better served if they all followed a continuing rhythm throughout. Hard to detail what I'm trying to say. Hopefully, you know what I mean.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA


*Bigsmile*Nice job. I really enjoyed the piece. Thanks for sharing.




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Review of Living to die  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi, Chelsii. After reading "Living to die" , I offer you these comments...Please bear in mind that all that follows is only my personal opinion, and you are free to disregard any and all of it. You, after all, are the writer.

First Impression:Heavy stuff. Hopefully, you are exploring such depths for artistic license.


Favorite Part:"Why am I trying to live, if I'm just living to die?"


Suggestions:If you truly feel this hopeless, consider this: True. We are living to die. Thing is, we only get the one chance to experience what it is to be alive. When we're done, we don't even have an oppurtunity to compare our lives with the inevitable alternative. Be glad you had a chance to form an opinion.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:One spacing problem, last stanza.


*Bigsmile*I liked the contrasting statements throughout the poem. True poetry lay there. I think you have a good head on your shoulders. Write on.



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Review of Yvette's Box  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hi, Pato. After reading "Yvette's Box" , I offer you these comments:

First Impression:Pretty good overall, though it lacked a resolution. I have gotten some grief myself for the same offfense, so don't think too much about it.


Favorite Part:I liked the creepiness of the box talking to Yvette, telling her what to do, getting excited about their arrival at some strange place...


Suggestions:I noticed some parts where you described some things for the sake of describing some things (i.e. "She wore a green shirt with no sleeves...a pendant made of amber." Also "...or the box translated your spiritual melody to me"). I think it's good practice to skip delving into details that don't contribute to or enhance the story. Just my personal opinion.


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:Nice Job.


*Bigsmile*You are a good story teller. Keep putting your stuff out there. Thanks for sharing.



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Review of Birdhouses  
Review by Kyle Curcio
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hi, Morgan. After reading "Birdhouses" , I offer you these comments:

First Impression:Loved the first line. I had to laugh at the seeming randomness of it. I've been impressed with your stuff before, so I knew there would be something in it...and so it goes.


Favorite Part:"In the winter we ate goats. Father taught us how to skin, and I made us all hats."


Suggestions:Don't have any. Except maybe you should write more (or post more. Whatever).


Punctuation, Spelling, Grammar:NA...Some people don't like short sentences. I have no such hangups.


*Bigsmile*I'm intrigued to look over some of your plays.



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Review of Letting Go  
Review by Kyle Curcio
Rated: E | (5.0)
Wow. Beautiful. It amazes me how somebody you don't even know can at times get right after your heart or write something that so closely describes your own experience. The poem is gorgeous in its imagery, and its brevity. You have a winner here, contest or not. Thanks for sharing.
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