I'm a casual reader. Did I enjoy the reading experience? Would I read more? I will highlight what I did and/or didn't enjoy. I do not edit grammar or spelling, but I might comment on it.
Speaking as a casual reader, I had to stop and make some popcorn. The read is slow yet interesting enough to keep going. I have mixed thoughts about the dialog. The characters speak in plain, clear English. Speeking clearly makes reading pleasant but takes away from the atmosphere. Which would be best? As much as I liked the clear speech, a peppering of Viking words might deepen the illusion. I am 50/50 on this, so take it as a thought. You need a second opinion.
What happens next? The end of chapter one had me wondering: What happens next for Grimolf, Bjorn, and Ulf? If there were more pages, I would have turned them.
Your efforts are well spent. The adventure is afoot, so to speak. I wish you the best of luck and encourage you to keep on writing.
Yes, that is a little dark. The descriptions paint a visible picture. I could see what was going on. As you stated, the subject matter isn't for everyone. Overall, it's a well-written story. Well enough, it leaves to the imagination what could happen next. One more sentence could be a thought describing the laundry soup being opened or poured into the water. The commercial implies it, but the action could carry it through. Keep writing.
Well written, I enjoyed the read. A fun story that reads like you have more to share. You left me wondering what happens next. A good hook. Thank you for sharing.
Oh, how do I connect to the progress bar? I spend hours watching the progress tick by. Those are the days of my youth.
It's a nice piece that reminds me of a slower time. Yes, instant gratification has weakened the bears (us all).
And then, there's the unexpected arrival of the stranger. Bringing the story of the world ending (the internet). The old pickpocket, in a moment of mischief, brings a temporary halt to the relentless hustle and bustle.
Could the interrupted supply chain of bits and bytes provide a needed breakāthe break we used to get by watching the progress bars?
I enjoyed reading this. It is well written. I think time is moving fast. Stop and wait for the progress bar when you can.
Keep writing you told a compelling characterization from history. I learned something and that is what you were going for, well done. There are a few dings on grammar.
Reads smooth. However, it seems the last paragraphs are missing. Consider breaking Blaze's description up and spreading the details into the following paragraphs. Instead of two leading sentences.
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