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Review Requests: OFF
672 Public Reviews Given
673 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest, for the most part. Not hurtful, for the most part. In other words I'll try to be straight up but not step on you face while I'm about it. Oh, by the way, this points business confuses me. I don't want to charge for a review. If I have the points in the bank I'll refund you 900. Why I'm required to ask 1000 is past my understanding.
I'm good at...
Not much. Grammar, spelling, punctuation, most of the mechanical stuff. Good eye for composition. I read a lot and I can give you a reader's opinion. Most good reviews are a fresh eye.
Favorite Genres
western, sci fi , detective, general or literary fiction
Least Favorite Genres
erotica
Favorite Item Types
what, pray tell, is an "item type"?
Least Favorite Item Types
See above
I will not review...
stories about kangaroos
Public Reviews
Previous ... 6 7 8 9 -10- 11 12 13 14 ... Next
226
226
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.5)
We have here, in season, an infestation of hummingbirds. Wicked creatures like angry little fairies that dispute among themselves with ferocity about the deed and title to the hummingbird feeder. But, while one bully is busied chasing away a tiny competitor another sneaks in for a quick drink.


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227
227
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (5.0)
The word "cultural" was well placed. When I think of culture I never envision the personal effect of culture on one individual. This piece of writing made me aware that culture is granular rather than monolithic. Although I could not put my finger on what gave me a sense of impending doom that foreboding existed in the writing. Thank you for sharing this.
dc


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228
228
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (5.0)
All this is probably true, but it's funny enough to be fiction. You have it labeled drama but comedy is more appropriate, especially in the narration. If you have not yet turned your hand to writing humor you are wasted. I saw nothing to criticize in this piece and everything to applaud. Thank you for sharing.
dc


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229
229
Review of She wanted him  
Review by Dee C
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive. But, I don't believe this was a first effort at deception or seduction for this girl; she was just too good at it. Pack the dream boat full of barbecue and his date full of bubbly then up stairs to see her etchings. Works for me.

I wondered if he was more the epitome of god-like than the epiphany. Seems like she'd already had her epiphany.
Thanks for snareing, er sharing.
dc


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230
230
Review by Dee C
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Ah, these meddlesome aliens. Just when you have the "perfect" look along comes a wisenheimer with a sex change ray gun and an atomizer of Chanel No. 5. You just can't have anything any more. Well, he did get to keep the erection. So there is that.
Thanks for sharing.
dc


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231
231
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.5)
We searched, my friends and I,
We'd swallowed whole the common lie
"There's a pot of gold out near the end,"
Said my lusty, trusty, and faithful friend
So we moiled and toiled and tramped and swore
But pots of gold? Sought, unseen and nevermore
Finally, we saw a hill then another and in between?
A pleasant valley, a field of green.
Found at last for comrades bold
The kind of pot that could be rolled.
dc


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232
232
Review of Anxiety  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.0)
Ma explained it all to me
"Ghosties ha naught to do with thee"
It seems, she said, that under my bed
Were fearsome friends of mine and thine
they had eyes to shine and teeth to shred
And not fair weather in the bright and sunny
But rain or shine sat my dust bunny
And what di he eat and love the most?
Why haunch of ghoul and fillet of ghost!

Sleep well but sweep not.
dc


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233
233
Review of nine 21 sentry  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (2.0)
I want some of what he's smoking.


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234
234
Review of The Road Trap  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am visualizing those iconic Greek masks representing comedy and tragedy, small distance between the two don't you think? The piece was not completely comic or horrifically tragic. As a certified , bonded and petrified critic of the works of others, I must ask for more punch lines to make the jokes punchier. I do think you have a lot of grist for future milling here and thank you for sharing it.
dc


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235
235
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.5)
While not particularly religious, I do have a keen appreciation for evangelism. For years I would search the radio dial for good examples. Most of them I found a delight to the ear if not always a companion of logic. I consoled myself with the fact that religion need not be logical to be helpful. It is nice to run across a writing that is.

Oh, yes in my radio travels I visited: Billy Graham. Oral Roberts, Garner Ted Armstrong and many others; my all time favorites were J. Basil and Mrs. Mull.

Thanks for sharing.
dc


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236
236
Review of Sea-Smoothed Rock  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.0)
Why that was so pretty it was poetic. Or so pretty as to be poetic, but you get the idea. It was likeable and well written. thanks for sharing it. So much poetry I see here reeks of self indulgence. this poem was free spirited and candid. thank you for sharing.
dc


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237
237
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.0)
You have now solved for all time the mystery of the missing sock. Now if I can find a way to open the parallel universe at will I will sent my odd socks over so someone on the other side can profit. I am not the sort to hold a grudge and better someone, somewhere, benefit if it cannot be me.


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238
Review of Silently killing  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (1.0)
You asked me to elaborate about proofreading.

The silence is killing me. My love for you is breaking me. It feels like the light betrayed me. You were supposed to cast the darkness away. Your departure from my life; ensuring it's presence in my life be eternal.

Your piece thus begins tediously with three simple sentences (before continuing with a fourth). The third is an incomplete sentence with a confused and incomprehensible meaning.


You didn't know you were the last ray of light in the otherwise encompassing darkness. I wonder, would you of still left knowing you were the peace I was aimlessly searching for.

A question ends with (?) not(.). “Have” left” not “of” left.

were the last connection left untainted;ending abruptly in silence.

This is not a sentence for the following reasons: No beginning capitalization, no subject (noun) and a semicolon used in place of a comma or dash.


This predicament creating a long phase of pondering;it has yet to end,making for long restless day's and nights.

Days not day’s. One space after a comma or semicolon. The tense has changed for this sentence from past to present for no reason.


Longing to embrace or let you go. I was so ceartain I would show you my fury should my eye's gaze upon you once more.

Incomplete sentence. Misspelling in second sentence.



Yet tonight I weep over What's been lost

“What’s” should begin in lower case.

The last one that didn't break my heart and you ran away as fast as you could in the opposite direction.

One, refers to who or what? Unclear.



If I'm such a good person as a lot exclaim,why am I forced to watch everything fall apart then float away? Why do I suffer every day;every moment my eye's are open!

Misuse of comma, semicolon, and apostrophe.


Why did she turn her back on me!

Question takes (?).


And so on....


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Review of Silently killing  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (1.5)
The writer needs a serious proofreading of this piece.
dc


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240
240
Review of Crossroads  
Review by Dee C
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)

The symbols we use are consistent with our culture. Crossroads, the concept, has always been interesting. The physical manifestation of a spiritual or psychological dilemma make for great symbolic poetry. You used this device well in your poem. I still see our speaker standing in the dust of a real crossroads looking each way.

thanks for sharing.
dc


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241
241
Review of Bare Hand  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (5.0)
So well done. I thought this writing was for lack of a better word, exquisite. ( I would have to invent a better word.) The characters are intimately drawn in the fewest possible words, the reader closely involved without any intrusion from the writer because the writer is completely invisible to the reader. This story is born like Topsey without parentage. It simply occurs in the head of the reader.

Thanks for posting such a good example for other aspiring writers.
dc


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242
242
Review of Last to Know  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (2.5)
I hate it when that happens. It's like meeting the perfect soul mate and through that old debbil' procrastination dilly dallying around until the ink fades on the number.


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243
243
Review by Dee C
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
To cool for school. I'll search the internet high and low to see what you have seen.. I expect I'll start with the low search and work up. Wish me luck.
dc


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244
244
Review of Lake Erie Feud  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (2.5)
Rockin and rollin rhyming, but the rhythm ain't right. Get the beat on and look for a gold record in record time.
dc


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245
245
Review of I Wish  
Review by Dee C
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
But, if you only had one wish....?
dc


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246
246
Review of His eyes  
Review by Dee C
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Ah, to find that perfect lover with baby blue eyes and plated feet.
dc


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247
247
Review of Ways of life  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (5.0)
I despaired because I had no shoes until I met a kangaroo who had no bicycle.
dc


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248
248
Review of My Plea  
Review by Dee C
Rated: E | (4.5)
Well done. I had never heard of a Cornish sonnet. Now I have.
Thanks
dc


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249
249
Review by Dee C
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I recall the Sixteenth St Baptist Church bombing vividly. Sad times. There are those who have no real feeling for the fellowship of humanity. Theirs is the really sad life.
dc


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250
250
Review of I asked God  
Review by Dee C
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
As a youth I prayed earnestly, for a pony. God didn't answer me. I think it was because he was too polite to call me a sap.
dc


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