I really like dark theme you applied in this poem and it's all true at the same time.
We could never move on unless we embrace the darkness within
Wisdom is the key to move on
This remind me when i went back to my home land in 2015
I by passed my friends homes, even my grand father's home and didn't even knew it!
All had changed...
One thing i noticed is that almost all the younger kids were a bit... chubby...
Though i really didn't wanted to believe that, less than 12 hours i arrived, after talking a walk around the neighbourhood
I knew i was right all along.
No more football fields or the field we used to play other sports, all gone.
Only made me feel like not wanting to go back, but you know how it goes.
You can never really hate your homeland as long as you remember all the good memories of your golden childhood.
Hi,
This is a very thoughtful and well structured poem.
I have read it a few times already and can't help it but read it again...
I will be back to read it again 😊
Hi
I am reviewing your poem
"But the name I hold, "Husna",
because it was in my Read & Review feed.
Originally i was a bit unsure of your poem, so i had to read it a few times to get the whole picture.
Author describes about her feelings, how she feels about her name and to have a better name (or want to be a different person perhaps?)
You have expressed yourself well in this poem, its nice and written in Free verses.
Well done.
This maybe off the topic but you also have reminded me of someone with the same name, we were classmates but that was a very long time ago.
We were good friends too.
Thank you for reminding me about her.
Keep writing!
Hi, and Welcome to WDC!
You have come to the right place to express yourself
I noticed your poem is of free verses from the very start
Currently i am on a mission to read and learn as much as i can about Free verses
I struggle a lot when it comes to symmetry and making sections; this is because of my bad grammer, i know.
Thing is though, i never knew i ever was a poet or even closer to becoming one till this last July when i joined here.
But by then i had already written like 200 poems alone!
I have tried editing them, but that proves to be too much
So now, i want to learn as much i can before i even think about writing another poem
Yours is perfectly fine though!
A wonderful poem filled with enlightenment
I am very happy that i got the chance to read this
And you were right about everything you wrote in it, in every single line
Keep writing!😊
Oh WOW!
I read this over and over like 5 times or more!
I am currently on a mission to learn about poetry as much as i can
I mean i didn't even knew about poetry at all till this year July
Coming here made me discover myself
So i thought going through other's work was the best way to learn,you know
My favourite part is the 4th section
The way you wrote is very thoughtful and productive
A masterpiece!
After reading this, i felt like as if you are going blind?
I hope not!
The poem is very nice indeed
Written in a easy to read format
It's quite normal for a person to live their whole life never to think what would happen if something was to happen to your vision
My little brother has some diagnosis with his vision
And as a result, we must take him to India for treatment once in a year
He talks to me about his problems, how difficult it is for him to stare at TV or even his smartphone as well
You reminded me of him the moment i read this line
My eyes will cease to see
I hope you are doing fine
A very thoughtful poem you have written here
Hi
I normally don't read stories and i have bad grammer (so i just focused on the message it self)
But i really liked this story though, mostly the dark theme you applied to it with a brilliant ending combined with hope.
"There's nothing a candle, some wine, and the woman that he loves in his arms can't fix"
You got that right for sure!
I am not sure, this is the only writing you had published so far since July
May i suggest you try writing short poems as well?
Maybe a song too, or even shorter stories
This is so you can take your time to discover your true passion for writing you know
Don't be afraid, keep writing and never quit. You can change your styles or your mistakes in time with good reviews
Main thing to do now is just focus on writing, don't let your mistakes to hold you back. Because this is how everyone learns you know. I enjoyed reading this story!
This is a very thoughtful poem
The emotions are well aligned in every line, and its smooth to read.
I like the flow you applied, easy to pick up; a masterpiece!
Hi
This is a remarkable poem
I really liked how you have written it
And i especially liked the whole message in it
I read it a few times already, and each time i do, i actually feel like each line is better than the other. It makes me wants to read it even more
I read all of them individually
And i don't know what to say
I will focus on the first writing where its like a symbol
I recogonise it from a video game i played years ago
God Of war
I really loved that
Its a masterpiece on its own league
Hi
This is a return review
I picked this one since no one had reviewed it before
This is entirely different from all the other poems i had reviewed before.
The poem takes the reader into a describe life as in stars
To be born anew, start fresh and to be free as we desire to be
And how life is going to carry you to new things or experience, i think
This is how i feel after reading it
Maybe its what you really want to show us here, or maybe entirely something else
But that is fine because that's the beauty of it, to have some sort if an attachment to the poem
I enjoyed reading this
My favourite lines are
Stars born in bounds
Naturally without counts
Re-vitalising lives on earth abounds
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