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1
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Review of Bunny Food.  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Just wanted to remind you that derivatives of the taboo words will disqualify you. So "leafed" is, I believe,"taboo".
2
2
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Ah, if only each person in the world could have an experience like this, and believe!

Great use of the prompt words.

My only beef is with the idea that there isn't pain in a normal dream. I'm one of those weirdos that can read, see color, and feel pain in dreams. I once had a dream where it was raining and I could feel the wetness of the drops on my skin, like I was really experiencing it. I don't think pain can be an indicator of whether a person is dreaming or not.

In this sentence:
"That is fascinating. You hold three Ph.D.’s, one in physics, one in philosophy and one in phycology..."
Did you mean psychology? Because phycology is the study of seaweed and algae...

Alrighty, hope I was helpful.
Good luck at the Cramp!

3
3
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
This is why I tell my kids over and over and over again that they can't trust that the person they "meet" online is who they say they are. That there's a danger in the world of the interwebz. Deprived individuals who get a sick pleasure out of pretending to be a child or the opposite gender, to a nefarious end.

I, too, don't see the reason a person would lie about who they are, unless they have an evil intent. I mean, if I didn't want someone to know my gender, I would leave it blank. *Rolleyes* And if someone called me "he", I would gently correct them. I've done it before. It's not a big deal. But, yeah, if someone doesn't say anything and then you find out they're not who they say they are, there's that feeling of betrayal.

There are times it's helpful, here at WDC, to know a person's gender. There have been prompts, before, where we're asked to use WDC members as characters in a story.

You said:

When I meet someone here on WDC and have a rapport, my naive little brain thinks it could be a friendship that lasts a lifetime. Perhaps I have my head in the clouds on this, and in reality, it's just a pipe dream. I mean, no one ever meets people online and develops a REAL friendship, do they? (read sarcastically).

and I just wanted to say 2 things:

1. There are times WDC members decide to meet up in real life. I believe there have been events, in the past, where large groups of folks here have traveled to meet and do writer's workshops, etc. So, yes, real friendships can be made and cultivated here.

2. I met my husband online. We'll have been married for 19 years this year. We're best friends and our love has only grown over the years. So, again, yes! An online friendship can be life-long.

And in the words of Forest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."
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Review of The Box  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (2.5)
Well, that had a creepy ending. No ticking to indicate how dangerous but, yeah, dude should have trusted his gut.

One big thing, you've got this rated as E but you've used naughty words and mentioned drugs so this needs to be changed to 18+

*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
5
5
Review of Testing!  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.0)
Hiya, Faith! Glad you found the path to WDC. I think you'll like it here. Lots of kind folks, friends around every corner. Won't be long before you'll get the hang of entering contests, participating in fun activities, and of course, writing and sharing your own work.

Saw you got your portfolio blurb up. Just wanted to encourage you to have fun with your bio. It's another great way for folks here to get to know you a bit better.

Hope you enjoy yourself here! See ya around!*Bigsmile*



*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Howdy there, pardner! Moseying along WDC and came across yer western. Thought I'd toss out some of my thoughts. If'n ya find them helpful, great! If not, well, just feel free to toss'em right out.

*Bootl* First off, you've got "It could have been worst" as the What a Character prompt, but I ain't seein' where that's been posted anywhere in the contest. From what I've read, ya just need a new twist on a cowboy cliche and that's it. Anywho, not sure if you wrote it that way on purpose, but shouldn't it read "It could have been worse"?

*Bootr* This sentence:
Going back in time to change the past and thus the future was a huge crime and very profitable indeed. Seems a mite clunky to read. I get the gist of it, but feels like it could be more clear. Mebbe something like: Going back in time to change the past and thus, the future, may have been a huge crime, but the profit outweighed the risk." Whadd'ya think, cowboy?

*Bootl* It's O.K. Corral, not Ok Coral. Coral is in the ocean, a corral holds my bronco. *Wink*

*Bootr* Alrighty, don't forget to capitalize the beginning of this sentence and put the proper quotation marks at the beginnin':
'think of it this way. It could be worst. You could be told to go back and kill your great-great-grandfather..." Love the foreshadowing. But there's that "worst" again. As it's not a required prompt for the contest, I'd highly suggest changing it to "worse", as it just ain't fittin' right.

*Bootl* Now I ain't an expert on time travel and such, but since Sam was related to Wild Hitchcock and Hitchcock was shot when Sam went back in time, wouldn't that cause Sam to, ya know, "poof!" outta existence, making it unnecessary for the other shootin' assassin to have a contract on him?

*Sheriff* Lots of potential for this here story, pardner, just needs some refinin'. Fortunately, you've got time to edit before the contest is judged.

Good luck, cowboy!



*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*


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Review of "The Aristocrats"  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I don't know why, but I stared at the word "daquiris" for far too long before it finally clicked in my brain what it was supposed to be. Reminds me of the first time I saw "Bichon Frise" written down and said, "Bitchin' Freeze"*Laugh* I guess you can tell I ain't much of a drinker, eh?

Okay, getting off that bunny trail...

Entertaining story. I love watching comedians. Seems like a hard job, though, to keep an act flowing and the audience laughing. Glad Emmie could see the humor in her friend crashing and burning. *Fire* *Wink*

Story seemed to fluctuate perspectives, which is a little distracting. Otherwise, great short story! Though I am curious what crime Sean was framed for...




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review of The Dialogue 500  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
"Welcome to the best darn contest on WDC!"

"The best, eh? Are you sure that wasn't a bunch of he said, she said?"

"Duh, of course not. That's not allowed here."

"Really? How about 'he asked'? Or 'she pouted'?"

"Not a teeny bit."

"Well, then how will the readers know who's speaking? Or where the scene is set? Or..."

"That's where creativity comes into play. And, trust me, it's a ton of fun coming up with something outside-the-box and amusing to the readers!"

"That does sound kinda interesting..."

"More than kinda! Like I said, best contest ever. Every month there is a fun prompt-"

"Like?"

"Hm. Well, like having a conversation with a vampire or Santa or two people trapped on a desert island."

"That sounds pretty cool. Sounds like something I could do."

"And then there's the prizes--"

"There's prizes?"

"I thought that would catch your attention. Yup, you get GPs just for entering!"

"What else? I assume there's a first place prize?"

"Sounding kinda greedy there, friend but, yeah. First place prize is 5k GPs and a Merit Badge."

"That's it. I can't stand it any longer!"

"What do you mean?"

"I've got to enter this contest. It's the best darn thing I've ever heard about!"

"Told ya so!"




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
What an interesting experience. My dad said he saw a flying object like that. He lives in Oregon, out in the country. Said he was out putting the chickens to bed and it came from over the trees, spotted him, and stopped just as he noticed it. Like it was watching him. He said he just stood there, staring, until it zipped up and went back over the trees, toward the hills.

Dad just shrugged off the experience because he knew there was a government facility a few miles away. He said he figured the government was out testing. Or trying to set him up so he'd run to the press.

I've seen weird things, too but, as a Christian (and being much like my dad) I just kinda shrug them off as spiritual or the government trying out new tech, etc.

Since you worked for in the Navy and have more knowledge of what goes on in the military, etc., do you think it could have been a government experiment that you witnessed?


*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
10
10
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
As a stay-at-home mom of 8 wonderfully evil minions, I totally understand the chaos. Thankfully, I have a mix of both genders so the house isn't 100% testosterone! A friend of mine has 5 girls, so she's got the house flooded with estrogen. I'm sure her husband loves all the random sobbing that females can bring to the table. *Wink*

Anyway, from my experience, taking time to write actually causes the minions to lose it more rather than less. *Laugh* It would be lovely if getting a p/t job writing about being a stay-at-home mom solved the problems of disobedient, lazy, willful minions. I mean, how can I get them to take over the world if they can't even pick their clothes up off the floor?

Still, what doesn't work for one mom could work for another, as proven in your story. *Smile*

Anyway, as to the actual story..."seeing" the action of the fighting boys was a good touch. Mostly telling rather than showing, but it worked. No punctuation, spelling, or grammar errors that I could spot.

Appreciated a story that acknowledges how hard it can be for us stay-at-homers. Thank ya!





*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a lovely world, where the moon makes faces and five-year-olds can tend a fire all by themselves. *Devilish*
And butts. Ah, rear ends will never not be funny. Trust me, I've got kids. Can't help but laugh about butts and farts all the time. *Laugh*

I only really noticed one punctuation error that you made
throughout, ahem, the story Here 'tis:

*Rocket* When a character speaks, you need to have a comma before the end-quote. For example:

"This is a nice night(.)(,)" said Mandy with a, believe it or not, smile on her face.

Fix all those piddly punctuation errors and you'll be right as rain!

Funny story. I really enjoyed it!

Oh, and on a completely different note....if you write up your bio in your portfolio, we can all get to know you better. *Bigsmile*





*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Is this an idea you're toying with? Notes for yourself? If so, you should put it on "private: my eyes only" to keep folks from getting a sneak peek.

Sounds like it would make for a fun Interactive, if that's what you're planning? Though I'd prefer to be my middle-aged self, controlling the element of
*Fire* fire *Fire*. Can there be an option to be an older human rather than a teen? Been there, done that. *Laugh*




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
13
13
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
You will never know how excited I was that somebody started a Dystopian/Apocalyptic contest. I had been considering doing it myself, a few years ago, but could never flesh it out.

One of my favorite genres are books that fit in the SHTF scenarios. End time, grid down, etc. etc. I find it extremely interesting diving into the life of a character in dire straights and "witnessing" how they survive.

Your contest is well laid out. Prizes are clear. Rules are clear.

Suggestions:

*Heart* The prompt is hard to find, as it's buried in the rules. I would create a dropnote just for the prompt or put it in a prominent spot on the page so a writer can see it at a glance.

*Heart* You have a dropnote list of winners, which is great. I would include the bitem link to their story, next to their name, so anyone who hasn't read the story can easily click and read.

*Heart* When you declare a winner it would be helpful if you posted a new message in the thread of your contest.

*Heart* Just for fun, you could include a countdown, um, counter. *Laugh* That way folks can tell when your contest is running and when a round ends.

Can't wait to see what the next prompt will be, in April!
Thank you for creating this contest!!




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
14
14
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I believe I've been lurking or joining your contest since you started it, five years ago. Since the get-go I've enjoyed seeing the different kinds of prompts you put out. Trying to figure out a different angle and stretch my "sci fi-ness" has been a lot of fun.

One of the things I really like about this contest and the way you lay it out is how you write a little something as inspiration. My suggestion, though, would be to put your story under a dropnote, since it can sometimes be hard to separate it from the prompt. Doing so will "clean up" the layout a bit, as well, which makes it easier for writers to suss out all the pertinent information.

I have noticed entries seem kinda sparse but that happens to a lot of contests. Advertising in the news feed will help remind newbies and oldbies that this contest exists and, hopefully, draw more people to write. I mean, this is sci-fi! Everyone loves sci-fi. And those that don't are just weirdos! *Laugh*

Another suggestion would be to maybe increase your first prize. Or change it up every month. GPs as a prize one month, Merit Badge the next, etc.

All-in-all, love this contest. I look forward to the new prompt every month!




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*



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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Got a good laugh from this conversation. At first I kept thinking, "But the dog's not talking!" *poutpoutpout* But then, the end and the reveal! It worked so well!

I also liked how Alfonzo called Skinfirth "Skinflint" *Laugh* And, of course, all the doggie puns were icing on the cake.

Here I was, hoping to have an easy win at this contest but then I've got this contender. *Wink*

I don't see anything that needs fixin' or improvement. Looks good!




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review of Four Leaf Clovers  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
What an evil, wee old leprechaun! I'm bettin' he was, perhaps, the black sheep in his family. Perhaps even a Brownie in disguise! Good thing you found the shamrock before he unleashed the bad luck! *Wink*

There were a few punctuation errors but nothing so huge that it draws the reader out of the story.

Enjoyed this read. *Bigsmile*




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
17
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Review of Luck of the Bard  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (2.0)
What lovely descriptions. I wanted to know more about Lyryk (beautiful name, by the way) and follow along to see what sorts of folks she would interact with but, while you had a great start to a story, it kinda just...ended abruptly. I was looking for a plot. Waiting to see what adventure(s) the bard might have, especially after having the luck of a shamrock grow near her. Honestly, I was disappointed that the story didn't go anywhere. What "luck" did she experience? I wanted to know. *Sad*

There was great potential here. I would have loved to read more but I understand how hard it can be to get a story in under 300 words.




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
18
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Review of The Experiment  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
As a Christ follower, this story really spoke to me. It is far to easy to let life get in the way of our relationship with Yahweh and I can't count how many times I've prayed, "If you just do 'this', then I'll do 'that'." sigh.

This was a good reminder that we should keep the promises we make with not only our Creator, but everyone else around us.

The end of this story, I was starting to feel skeptical like, "Uh, huh. Riiiight." But then the reveal of the nightmare and I was able to sink back into the fantasy. *Laugh* Got me there!

I didn't notice any spelling errors or grammatical mistakes. Loved how this was set in the future, with all the holograms and whatnot.




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
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Review of life at eighty  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Well, this was refreshingly honest. I've often been skeptical that growing older is a blessing (even with my Christian background where "gray hair is crown of glory"), especially since I've had my own spars with health issues, over the years, that have kept me from all of the above in your poem.

Anyway, I can relate. This poem, short and sweet, can be felt by all who struggle with age restraints or health.

I *Heart* the pun at the end of your poem. It pulls it all together and gives the reader a chuckle amidst the frustrations.




*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
20
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Honestly, I was looking for something to nitpick but, sheesh, you gave me nothing! Instead, I was immediately drawn in to this story and couldn't leave until I reached the end.

I loved how the culture is slowly revealed through action. Loved the description of the ram and how it was used as a lesson. The fight scene had me feeling like I was there, which is exactly how a reader should feel. The fear at the end when Emmit realizes what's going on and the shock of it all--as a parent, I could feel that.

So I guess I'm not much help, as you've obviously got this well in hand. Hopefully you'll write more about Richard and we readers can ride along on this adventure and see what happens next in this world!





*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of YoungTown  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Kids surviving alone in the wild west? I love it! It is a wonderful concept and I found myself drawn in to their adventure.

I do have a couple of nitpicks that, hopefully, will be helpful:

*Bootl* In the fourth section, Jason says they have enough supplies and food to possibly last for years. I guess this can show how the kids don't fully understand the situation...that they can't rightly judge how much they actually have. But since they come across as fairly intelligent and competent I found myself feeling drawn out of the story and skeptical. Most of us know the pioneers could only carry so much food. It wouldn't have lasted years, as they had to resupply when they could and did a lot of hunting along the way. My suggestion would be to take out that particular comment.

*Bootr* In the fifth section the conversation with the outlaw seems strange. I don't understand why the kids would know who these men are or why they would say anything to Jason's face about "this being easy". It all seems a bit awkward. Though I do
love the confrontation, it just feels like it needs to be tweaked a bit. I also would have loved to read more and really get into the action of the kids defending themselves against these criminals.

*Bootl* Also in the fifth section, you have an out-of-place question mark. *Wink*

*Bootr* The jump from the fifth section to the sixth is a bit abrupt. Feels too rushed. I was expecting more adventure and drama and to experience all they experienced as they traveled to the new town. Did they lose any kids along the way to a snake bite, drowning, or dysentery? Were any romances formed along the way, among the older teens (completely plausible in that time era)? What happened when they sent out hunting parties? Did anyone try to challenge Jason's apparent leadership role?

*Bootl* Section seven, could I suggest the word "brushing off the dust" in lieu of "dusting off the dust"? Or maybe "swiping off the dust"? I do love that the kids realize they are just as able as the adults to build. Kids from that time era seemed to be more responsible and have more experience in survival than those in this current time.

*Bootr* I don't really understand why the kids can't turn the outlaws in for a reward. Is it because they're trying to stay hidden from the adults out in the world or do they not know how or who to send to fetch back the law from another town or...? And the reference to the parent's tech...now I'm a bit confused. I had assumed this was historical fiction but now...?? What tech did the parents have that the kids don't? This could open up a big ole can of worms in the story plot. I would love to see that angle wriggle it's way into the story.

*Bootl* Love the twist of the Indian kids joining the town. This could bring all sorts of adventures into the story.

*Bootr* One big thing that stuck out to me was how formally the kids spoke. They all sounded the same. I would have loved to "hear" some differences in voice. A boy with a lisp or a gal that says "yer" instead of "your", etc. I also was hoping to "see" more of the scene. What's around them? Does the quilt the kids huddle under while sitting in front of the fire feel itchy? I want to smell the smoke that's wafting from the campfire into the kids' faces. I want to hear the horses stamping and neighing.

*Bootl* This story has left me wondering what those kids are doing. I want to jump into that world and watch as they learn and grow and love and betray each other. This truly was a great idea and with some fleshing out, I could see it as a successful YA book.


*Crazy**Shamrock* A review to celebrate you in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's March Mayhem Raid! *Tophat**Bigsmile*
A WDC Superpower Review Sig


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
22
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Review of Truth  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
This is a good start for a high schooler. I've always enjoyed reading essays/articles from others and seeing how they "persuade" or explain.

I have a few thoughts. Hopefully you find them helpful:

You can expand this article/essay by including more information such as, what holy books are you speaking of? As a Christian my first thought went to the Bible but I can't remember an instance where it was said that "truth" would be lost by the end of this era. However, it is speculated in Luke 18:8 that when the Son of Man returns, faith might not be found any longer. At any rate, clarification at the beginning can help those with preconceived notions. *Wink*

You say
"humanity has already ended". This would be a great place to explain further and provide links proving this statement. When I look up the word "humanity", for example, it means, "the human race; human beings collectively". And it's fairly obvious that the human race is still thriving. Again, clarification on what you mean here can be helpful to persuade others of your opinion and reduce confusion. How has humanity ended?

"Everyone is talking false." This is a pretty absolute statement. Everyone? Really? *Eyesleft*
"Truth is bitter but is the way to salvation and heaven."
These two statements above seem to contradict each other. How can one obtain salvation through truth if everybody is speaking false?
Does this mean, in your opinion, that there is no hope for salvation for anyone?

I have heard honesty is the best policy but I've never heard
truth is the best policy. Here, you could use the better known saying about honesty and then explain further how it is potentially lacking in fullness.

All-in-all, there is great potential here for expansion and clarification. Provide research links to back up your claims and don't be afraid to quote the holy books that you are using. *Bigsmile*

Oh, and



to WDC!




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of A Wish come true  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.0)
Pssst! you need to bold that last line or you'll be disqualified at the Writer's Cramp!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This was an amazing story. Gave the feel of Frank Peretti's books: This Present Darkness and Piercing the Darkness. I think we often forget there is a spiritual war literally going on around us.

A few notes:
The title has to be "A Dream Come True", or you'll be disqualified at the Writer's Cramp.

Also, the bolded line, "this must be a parallel universe" has to be the last line of the story or, again, Writer's Cramp will disqualify you.

Your first paragraph you write, "all would acknowledge his rain" it should be "reign".

I like you you use the Bible as inspiration for many of your stories.
Good luck at the Cramp!
*Bigsmile*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Earth Is Hell  
Review by Genipher
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Eek. This hits too close to home!

This story sucked me in and I couldn't stop reading until the end. Very well done!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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