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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/girlinwhite
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20 Public Reviews Given
20 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of The Chat Line  
Review by Girlinwhite
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Yikes......this is so REAL. I got a little bit of a knot in my stomach reading it.
Never think about all the bad stuff that can happen like that. I am one of those trusting
ones.
I shall keep this in mind.
Very cleverly written. Thanks for sharing it!
Message comes across loud and clear....

Artistic and relevant!

Regards,
Girlinwhite
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Review by Girlinwhite
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a beautiful piece, capturing a profound moment in time. Losing our parents is so difficult and the process of going through their belongings seems to always uncover something touching.

I think this is written very well and certainly gets the message across clearly.

I think as far as grammar goes you have a few spots that could be written better.
IE:A CD of the pictures and 4 by 6 prints. I could pick them up in an hour but all I wanted to do was go home so I would pick them up in the morning.
"A CD of the pictures and 4 by 6 prints" is not a sentence. But, these are minor and I am not trying to be picky. Just letting you know in case you are interested in that. :)


I loved reading it and hope you continue to share your writing with us!
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Review of Dementia  
Review by Girlinwhite
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is very powerful. A daughter looking back at all the times her mother was there for her.... a life of being well loved. It is so difficult to watch a parent fade into this disease, to be robbed of them while you can only stand by and watch. And now, with all the compassion she gave you, you will give back to her. A touching piece and I am sorry you have to experience this kind of loss.

Your message was clearly explained. Written from your heart, the emotion can be felt.
Grammar wise it probably could use a little touching up in a few long sentences.

Thank you for sharing this.

Sincerely,
Dyan
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Review of A Swan  
Review by Girlinwhite
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I love this!!! What a sweet little story you wrote! I want to be Hannah!
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