|Uh wow, there's lots of new ideas here, in this one chapter...have you thought of breaking it down into smaller segments?
Likes: The idea, the concept behind it, being able to see into other people's minds, and they don't know you are there.
There's a lot of information to process here. While this can be worked into a story quite well, I'm not sure if I would have done it in quite this amount all at once.
Switches between passive and active voice, a lot.
What exactly is different about this human? I'm curious now...
can't wait to read more!