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Who is this Person that reads your work. Open in new Window. (E)
Just an brief intro of the person you have entrusted your work to.
#228107 by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Public Reviews
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I'm not much of a poet, and I only dabble when I do, but I have to say that I like the reading of the 2nd much better than the 1st. I had to re-read parts of the first to understand and tie into the next line. The second one moved more smoothly, and I was able to better comprehend the message to be told.
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Review of THE END RESULT  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
The result is a complete transition from procrastination to results. I like the way you provided what most feel, as they tell themselves there is much to do, so get up and do it. Nicely done and welcome to WdC.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (2.0)
These feel to me like a rough draft. The plot is a good one. I remember a movie on this same idea. In time with thought, this could be developed into a good short story.

I don't know how much mote of this I can do, it's lonely, no friends, no family. = spelling [more]

A virus that spread like wildfire, we stood no chance, it was airborne, sweats, fever, sickness, vomiting, it would catch you off guard, you feel fine one minute and the next, you were on deaths door. = missing apostrophe [death's]

I could go into any car dealership, take whatever car I wanted to and rag it around the streets, no cares in the world, no one else's safety, just me. = this must be a phase you use, but would be better suited to use the word [drive]

, I was getting around on the night with torches, complete darkness, you couldn't see a meter infront of you. = two words [in front]

Terrifying thinking about it, the fear of the unknown, was there anything lurking in the dark. = period should be a [?]

Even now writing this all down, I'm alone, ^ I've forgotten what my own voice sounds like. ^= missing word [and]

So that's why after^ six months of just being alone, it's time for me to try and find people, see if I can find anyone, am I truly the last person in the world
. = periord should be a [?] - ^ missing comma [after,]

My plans are to travel, I'm taking a 4x4 from the car dealership just across the
round from the house I have been living in. = spelling [road]

I'm going to hit every possible city,
f*** it, even country if I can, ^ see if I can find any signs of life. ^= missing word [to] - The rating on your item is incorrect based on the use of this word your rating should be CG

I have left this letter here, if you are reading this, there will be a radio in the draw underneath this table where you have found this letter, If you find it, radio me, let me remember what my own voice sounds like, give me hope that I'm not the last person alive.
here, if - should be here. If
spelling [drawer]
letter, If - should be [.] not a [,]

I have left a map with all the cities I will be going ^ and routes that I will be taking, follow it, it will be nice to speak and see another person. ^= missing word [to]

I hope you find
this, I wish you the best, I hope we find each other, be nice to have someone again, or maybe even a group of people, wishful thinking, but who knows?
this, - should be [.] not [,]
best, - should be [.] not [,]
people, wishful - should be [.] not comma, and Capitalize W on wishful
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I found this to be a captivating article on the mechanics of the human reaction to words. You clearly defined it pit falls and uses, including examples of your own interpretations. I would be curious if this was an oral presentation or a written article for a business forum. In oral form, it could be quite different in how we hear vs how we read.

I did find that the lack of commas throughout your piece was a touch distracting, but overall a good read. Thanks for sharing.

A few corrections for you I found along the way:
Logically, if we accept that we can get better, then it is highly probable ^ there is someone already better than us. ^= missing word [that]

An employee who is putting in long hours on a project notices that a team member is not spending enough time on the project. = I don't believe the [s] is required on this word

so what?”. = The [s] should be capitalized, also double punctuation at the end [.] should be removed

It would be easier to read and not look light run on if there was blank space added between bullet numbered points

Money, customer base, customer satisfaction, funding, lives saved? = this line is in answer to the question before it, therefore the [?] should be a [.]

Re-word and explain the intent. = reword does not require a hyphen

This may not be immediately remedied,^ don’t give up. ^= missing word [but]

Trust will usually offer a get-out-of-jail-free card here, don’t
abusee it. = spelling [abuse] delete additional [e]

“What are you doing to improve yourself
?”, = comma should be before the question mark

“How come you don’t already know that
?”, = comma should be before the question mark

If something is detrimental to our communication, it is also likely detrimental to our relationships and possibly ^ health. ^= missing word [our]

To round this out I am going to offer a personal example of charged words that
has taken me a long time to cope with. = has should be have

The most obvious example of this is the “yes, but” conjunction. In most cases this means that the person using the conjunction has not taken the time to hear what I’ve said and has already prepared their
defenses, waiting to pounce as soon as I pause for air. = spelling [defences]

I offer this example of
dismissive from the Canadian comedy troupe The Frantics’ skit “Boot to the Head”: = dismissiveness might be a better word use here | I don't believe the apostrophe is required here

Mindfulness offers many more communication benefits than just discharging emotional words
, I recommend everyone at least learn what it is. It can only make you better. = I believe the comma should be a period, with a new line starting with the I
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Review of 119  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love the irony of this story. From a prompt perspective, I have to say you nailed it and covered all the bases. This was captivating and easy to read. Your characters were believable and true to form. Nicely done.
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Review of Beachcomber  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
At first thought it appeared to be some type of dream scenario, but by the 5th paragraph, it was clear that this was about a lost person. Going back, it was clear to see that it was the thoughts of the missing person which I had first read.

The plot of the story was relatively good, with both having different thoughts regarding their relationship that eventually comes full circle to a greater understanding of each other.

The dialogue was good and used appropriately.

The characters were each given a good personality, while only a description of their thoughts and not their actual person.

I think perhaps opening the story with Dan and the officer would have served your story with more clarity in the beginning.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank you for writing in such vivid description how a day in the life of a flautist unfolds. The story itself was a combination of grace, information, drama, and selflessness in one man's struggle as he helps so many others.
Very Nicely Done.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I line the 4-line stanza with each providing a piece to the story. The characters are portrayed with each stanza completed.
The setting of an old-fashioned town was perfect. Now this is a poem that would make a good 2,000-word story.
Nicely Done
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Review of Ghost  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Each stanza was a reflection of a time as life fades and a soul breaks free to hopefully a better place.
This had a very nice reading pattern to it, each line bled to the next with grace. Very nicely done.
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Review of Break  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Your words are from the heart that speak the truth. So many force an isolation between the past and the future. Some have the capabilities to love so many, while others can only love one.

I might suggest breaking the 2,3, and 4 lines just a touch so it will balance a little more.
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Review of Ritual  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Sweetness and Sadness all mixed together. Your words ring true for many who wish for just one more day or just another moment. Life can be cruel to so many and take away what once made us happy. Nicely done.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a compelling read. It begs you to continue, for you think you know what the ending will be.
And then it was not. thump... thump... thump... thump... still echoes in my mind. Very nicely done.
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Review of A Choice  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Great choice of words used to describe the personal fight between evil and good. Each stanza takes you through the tricks that are played within the mind. Nice touch with the ending, to know evil will be left behind, lurking for the next opportunity to tease the heart once more. An enjoyable read.
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Review of The Writers  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Those are some serious words, with each stanza representing a new page in what seems a lifetime of actions that bring us to where we are now. Very nicely done. A most enjoyable read.
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Review of Dear Me 2026  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I find this letter to be more of a comfort in what needs to be done and how you will work towards completion.
The most powerful statement here is to renew your commitment to writing. Writing can be a great tool to release the mind of its worries, to speak to yourself through words of what is troubling you, or holding you back from doing the things you really want to do. It can also be a place to shed your tears, to be stronger the next day.
The second powerful statement is finances. Burying your troubles or wishing them to disappear will never give you peace. The best approach, while not the easiest, is to meet it head-on and work through the process to transform the bad into not so great, into getting better, into good. It is a hard process, and it is clear you are taking the first step. I wish you well.
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Review of The Book of Love  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.0)
Good thoughts, on your story of love, but far too many errors.

I know I really love you because deep in my heart you are so special to.^= missing the word me at end
You give me joy you ^male me smile when I am sad. ^= male should be make
If I could write a book I would ^word it with my thoughts of how you made me feel so lucky to have you in my life.^= word should be write
No one can replace you we are ^bond to each other. ^= bond should be bound
I thought I lost you.
But I found you .
You fill this emptiness that I had for so long.^My heart Is heavy when I think about you. ^= put a space between long. and My
My mind is on you day and night .
When I go to Sleep I toss and turn I ^cant Sleep because you are on my mind. ^= cant should be can't
I deserve you and you deserve me.
Together we deserve each other ,
So as we walk hand ^and hand. ^=and should be in
This is my story: The Book of Love
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Review of Sagittarius  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Well it was dark. To die on your birthday, hmmm. Good luck in the contest.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Your word list Blase is not in the puzzle; however Blas is, and it fulfilled the word list. Just thought you would like to know.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
A mother's grief. A son's misunderstanding. Both were conveyed exceptionally in this story. The description you provided as each scene moved smoothly to another set the visual for the reader's mind, completed with a compelling story plot that was to unfold. Your use of dialogue moved the story with perfect measurement, tone, and reality. "What the hell" was perfectly placed, providing additional characters, and I actually anticipated the grave diggers finding Robbie. Surprise, what a great twist. I enjoyed this story, thanks for sharing.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
You have captured the residual meaning of an object, which brings forth the memories of time that has passed.
Your character is full of reflection, love, remorse, and self-being. Your writing has captured her well. The smooth flow of your words begs you to continue reading to see how it all ends. An enjoyable story to read.

I did find one minor word missing:
“That might actually ^ fun, give me something to do!” ^= be
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Neat concept - I talk to myself all the time - but never thought to literally make a record of comments to myself.
The fact that you did this for a whole year is impressive. Sept 16th was very intuitive.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Interesting story, your bully character was true to form. The feelings of the boy being terrorized by the bully and his gang were well played. The introduction of the stranger was rather sudden; this could have been expanded more, or perhaps you plan to do this if you continue the story itself.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Your descriptive writing is most impressive. The use of the supernatural genre was very nicely done. The story was compelling from start to finish and a most enjoyable read, but for one minor point.

The font you have used in this item is extremely hard to read for the length of this piece. Might I suggest you change the font to another? I myself did a copy and paste into Word with a font that made the story so much more enjoyable.
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Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Compelling storyline, you want to read, but it seems dark, and you don't, but then you continue, because you have to know what comes next. Nicely done. I did not see her saying teach me - that was a good twist.

fissure haha you made me look it up - l'm not sure its the right word for what you want to imply about Rogers

She felt an odd compulsion to explore, to uncover whatever lay hidden behind the tidy fade. - Did you mean facade?

Nothing seemed out of place--just ordinary clothes, a stack of novels, an old vinyl record collection. - I think you might want 'and' after novels

You seem to have a fair amount of words that I would normally hypenate but you didn't. - wasn't sure if that was intentional or not.
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Review of The Tall Trees  Open in new Window.
Review by Wannabe Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
This poem reads well and tells a tale of the final release from this life.
I have noticed a trend where your poems repeat certain stanzas.
Again, this popped in my Read a Newbie - it's always a surprise when I find your name attached to it.
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