Honest but encouraging I use an outline (form)to make sure I've covered all the bases but within that, it's pure dialogue. Let's talk about your write.
It's me, Ken, and I decided to check out your "Promptly Poetry Challenge (2023-2024)" entry in spite of your groaning. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Week 3" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A reality check. 😀 I thought you used the prompt very creatively and found a hidden message in an otherwise mundane landscape image.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very sobering but great read with a lesson us old farts will immediately shake our heads in unison with. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
OK, perhaps I'm a bit older than you... OK, a lot older than you ... but I seem to remember that "Bah Humbug" had a slightly different meaning than what you've given us.
Nonetheless, I found this a really great example of an Acrostic. I give you high marks for adding the rhyme which makes it flow beautifully.
Really great poem. Wishing you all the best in the contest (unless, of course, I enter )
It's me, Ken, and I decided to check out your winning entry for day 7. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "O' Heralder" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
What a great tale (no pun intended). 😀 I loved the classic feel of this and could immediately identify with your characters. The flow was clean and really let the story unfold without any awkward moments or breaks. Your use of multiple words integrated into the poem was brilliant. Really well done.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very fun read and well deserving of a ribbon. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in the spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I decided to check out the completion. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Fair Warning" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
So many warnings we see are so obvious... why don't people come with them? 🤣 I loved the twist at the end. The rhymes were clean and really guide the reader down one path while you lead them to a surprise ending. Really well done.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very fun read with a lesson most will immediately shake their heads in unison with. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
Beautifully written and opens a world of opportunity for one's imagination. I guess my one hesitation is that I want it to lead somewhere. Just my personal preference... or maybe my OCD . My instinct says that all of your "to be's" are a part of and within you which I think works with your faith and beliefs.
My name is Ken, and I ran across your poem highlighted in the Poetry Newsletter. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "The Empty Chair" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
Not sure why but I found this very touching. It plays on the emotions and made me recall the times I felt this way about an object that had been part of generations past, packed away, and seemingly forgotten.
Just a suggestion: make the font size:4. It will make it easier to read not only from a size perspective but it will increase the spacing between lines
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: Excellent poem. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I decided to check out your port since you were kind enough to review one of my poems. 😁 Welcome to WDC. I'm happy you found us and hope you find a home here.
It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "That one thanksgiving" . It wasn't a hard decision, it's all you have posted.
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
What a terrible tale! I think everyone knows that such abuse takes place but we are rarely confronted with the truth. I applaud your courage to openly tell of your experience and for finding the strength to leave.
A couple of minor technical suggestions: if you add {size:4} at the beginning, the font will appear larger and help us old geezers read it easier. Some minor changes in the grammar for clarity:
You wrote:
"you are lieing to
you asked for it to
it didn't happen to
you are crazy."
For clarity:
you are lying,
to you asked for it,
to it didn't happen,
to you are crazy.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very disturbing read with a reminder that the world isn't what we want to imagine; there are people who are in desperate situations and we should always be aware and compassionate. Thank you for sharing your journey and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I saw you're a newbie so thought I'd check out what you're up to as well as return the favor. It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Ink" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
What a great poem/lyric. It really spoke to me. OK - the theme seems to wander just a bit from where it began and "Ink" but the consistency of structure holds it all together. The rhymes were clean and really let the story unfold with any awkward moments or breaks. Really well done. My favorite was the opening verse. I may have to steal that idea for a future poem... but I'll give you credit.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: based on impact. You read my observations so take them or don't. A very interesting and engaging read. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I decided to follow your "bread crumbs" since you invited me. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "A Young Nation" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
Very appropriate! 😀 OK - I spent 20+ years in the military so I have a true affinity for this type of writing. 🤣 I loved the recognition of what we are and, while not perfect, we remain the "shining city upon the hill." Too many think that acknowledging our failures is a weakness. It's not! Really well done.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very moving read with a lesson us. I did deduct a for the broken rhyme in the second stanza (spurn/gain) but it's minor and doesn't detract from the message. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Honoring Our Country "
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to those who have served and a strong statement of devotion to the values they stand for.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for this country. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Honoring Our Country." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. I appreciate that you added a personal line about its meaning to amplify and set up the scenario for your poem although I think this was more a tribute to your grandfather than the nation.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well-chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in free verse. Free verse is a type of poetry that does not contain patterns of rhyme or meter. Free verse is considered an open form of poetry, as opposed to poetry written in structure or form, and tends to follow natural speech patterns and rhythms. However, free verse generally contains poetic lines and poetic imagery that distinguish it from prose. I felt that this was missing the flow that poetry has and felt it was very prose-like. That said, Robert Frost once said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this.
One thing to look out for is consistency. You said, "I never knew him" and followed that up with "but if I meet him again." The conflict of the two statements will stop a reader in his tracks.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very moving read. I personally found it touching and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
They say all humor is anchored in reality. So, hats off to you for finding the mirth in an otherwise stressful situation... and hats off to your wife for keeping you around.
So true, my friend! Well, except the part about the fault lies with me, of course... Well done with a message that should resonate with each and every one of us.
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
Well said in only 140 characters. It is a strong statement of your beliefs and faith. I found the ending - "a heart stayed on him" - a bit awkward but when tweeting, you do what you can. . My only hesitation with this is that I really don't see this as a "story or poem" which is what Sally is looking for. Nonetheless, it's clearly a heartfelt message.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very strong statement of the tenents of your faith. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I saw this posted in "I Write in 2019" as your Week 24 entry. 😁 It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Summers of Dissatisfaction" . Just as a suggestion - if you're going to enter a lot of little contests or regularly enter in a short one (such as 25 words or 24 Syllables), consider creating a book. It will hold up to 100 entries and only count as one item in your port.
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
What a colorful take on the working side of Summer. 😀 OK - I'm retired so I see it a bit differently. 🤣 A different take on the "what Summer means to you" but that's the wonder of writing. We all have different experiences. I do hope that you get a vacation break soon. "All work and no play..." 😀
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very interesting read. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken, and I saw this posted in the Newsfeed. 😁 Darn, Ben! Where have you been? I've missed these little gems you dot the site with. It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Too Dang Hot" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
Perfect form (of course) and a light and sweaty airy tone makes this a fun read. It's about a week late for where I live but it certainly reflects where we were just a short time ago! Luckily, this isn't climate change - it's just "very bad weather."
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very humorous and fun read. Thank you for sharing your journey of off-kilter humor, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Honoring You" as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to those who have served and a strong statement of devotion to the values they stand for.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for this country. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Honoring You." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. I appreciate that you added a personal line about it's meaning to amplify and set up the scenario for your poem.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in free verse. Free verse is a type of poetry that does not contain patterns of rhyme or meter. Free verse is considered an open form of poetry, as opposed to poetry written in structure or form, and tends to follow natural speech patterns and rhythms. However, free verse generally contains poetic lines and poetic imagery that distinguish it from prose. I felt that this was missing the flow that poetry has and felt it was very prose-like. That said, Robert Frost once said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very moving read. I personally found it touching and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Prompted by Poet's Place Cafe " - Outside the VA Clinic - as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to our veterans and the close bonds they have across age, disability, and wars. While not exactly what I was expecting 😀 it was nonetheless a moving tale and one I salute you for writing!
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for those who've served. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Outside the VA Clinic." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in free verse. Free verse is a type of poetry that does not contain patterns of rhyme or meter. Free verse is considered an open form of poetry, as opposed to poetry written in structure or form, and tends to follow natural speech patterns and rhythms. However, free verse generally contains poetic lines and poetic imagery that distinguish it from prose. I felt the flow that poetry in this. As Robert Frost once said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very captivating and unexpected read. I personally found it interesting and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Still, The Soldiers Fight Today" as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to those who've paid for the freedom we enjoy. Thank you for including those who have died not on the battlefield but from the service to their country.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for this country. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Still, The Soldiers Fight Today." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. While I appreciate that added promotion of the contest, I think you could have added a personal line about it's meaning to amplify and set up the scenario for your poem.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in a Quatrain form with an abcbd rhyme. The refrain line was very effective. While the meter varies, it didn't seem to affect the smooth flow. As with all poetry, the key is found in emotional content. As Robert Frost said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this. 😂
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very fulfilling read. I personally found it interesting and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "Serving with Honor" as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to the members of our armed forces that reminds each of us how much we have and how much we owe. Our soldiers have nobly fought to protect freedom since our country's birth, and have fought to protect those that could not protect themselves, even in foreign lands when called upon.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for those that protect us. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Serving with Honor." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. I think you used it brilliantly to amplify your meaning and set up the scenario for your poem.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in free verse. Free verse is a type of poetry that does not contain patterns of rhyme or meter. Free verse is considered an open form of poetry, as opposed to poetry written in structure or form, and tends to follow natural speech patterns and rhythms. However, free verse generally contains poetic lines and poetic imagery that distinguish it from prose. I felt that this was missing the flow that poetry has and felt it was very prose-like. That said, Robert Frost once said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this.
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very emotional read. I personally found it moving and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "A Spectacular Display" as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
What's not to love about this? Just the thought of the firework displays - both great and small - around the 4th of July is enough to bring a big smile on anyone's face along with a flood of happy memories.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a memory and a feeling of the wonder that we all have as kids and adults. That makes this both unique to you and a shared experience. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "A Spectacular Display." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. I think you used it brilliantly to amplify and set up the scenario for your poem.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings about the event as well as provide a visual sense of what you were seeing. Each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written as a traditional Rondeau. I appreciate that the Rondeau has no set meter and I thought your choice of a Fourteener was unique. It does take several readings to really get into the flow since most are used to tetrameter or pentameter. As Robert Frost said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this. 😂
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very fun and visual read. I personally found it brought back a lot of memories as well as feelings of excitement and I really enjoyed it. My hesitation in giving this 5 stars is really more about the subject. While you did mention patriotism in the second verse, I think the overall poem was really geared toward the display rather than the meaning of it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
It's me, Ken. Thank you for your entry in the "HONORING OUR VETERANS " poetry/short story contest. ** Image ID #2161631 Unavailable ** . It is my pleasure to both read and provide you feedback on your work "STAR SPANGLED BANNER" as a member of and on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" .
✨ First Impression/Thoughts:
A moving tribute to our flag and a strong statement of devotion to the values it stands for.
✨ Creativity/Impact:
I can tell by the words and emotions you've woven together that this is more than just an entry. It is a testimonial of your beliefs and love for this country. While similar words have been spoken, these come from your heart and that makes it unique to you. You can't be more creative than that!
✨ Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as a criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words 😁.
🔹 Title - "Star Spangled Banner." You left little doubt about what this poem was about. 😄 If this doesn't get the reader's attention, then I don't know what will. The "teaser" line (a.k.a. description) offers you an opportunity to add some clarification and can also be a great tool to attract more readers. While I appreciate that added promotion of the contest, I think you could have added a personal line about it's meaning to amplify and set up the scenario for your poem.
🔹 Grammar/Wording - Great word choice! Your descriptive words to build images in the reader's mind. I saw nothing in error. You used language to show your feelings and each word seemed well chosen to paint the story of your poem.
🔹 Form/Flow - This was written in a Quatrain form with an abcb rhyme. While the meter varies, it didn't seem to affect the smooth flow. As with all poetry, the key is found in emotional content. As Robert Frost said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words." I could see the poetry and - more importantly - feel the emotion in this. 😂
✨ Overall Rating/Final Thoughts: A very captivating read. I personally found it interesting and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your journey of creativity, imagination, and talent with me today.
Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 1.08 seconds at 6:33pm on Sep 25, 2023 via server web2.