Hello! Michael Alexander here, at your service!
Thought I'd stop by and read and review your work! My review below is purely my honest opinion, yet will be positive, helpful and encouraging! Writing is creativity and you can't always judge someone's creation!
First impression: Intriguing little first chapter and the idea did hook me.
Story/Poem itself: Obviously, this was only 207 words, but the story itself is a good idea and one that could definitely be made into something.
Any editing/writing suggestions: While I liked the idea, I'm afraid this piece was full of errors, grammatical and otherwise. I presume you're a student foreigner so will let you off the hook for a very good attempt! I tried to read your bio, but you've not filled it out. It would be a good idea to do this so others on the site can understand you a little more and help you write the work you want.
To help you, below is your entire piece, which I've edited for you, however only the very basic errors. You will need to spot what you did wrong so you can learn from it. I've put in parenthesis what you did wrong. Parenthesis are these just in case:()
"It (capital I) was a dark night and Triston (you left the t out) (I removed for) was in his room reading some ancient book. (period, not comma)
A (capital at the beginning of every sentence) few minutes later (you mispelled later) Triston begins to hear his father talking and he slowly walks out of his room to the room his father's in (not at).
He (again capital) saw a man wearing a dark black hat and cloak-like jacket, and the man begins to speak
"We (capital W) must not let anyone find out about the cybertronic universe." period after each sentence finished.) The (capital) man said to Triston's father (' is used when referring to someone's belongings or relation such as it is Triston's, you wouldn't say it was Triston),
as Triston (capital) heard that he began to be shocked wondering what the cybertronic universe was. The man was suddenly about to leave the room, his eyes turned a blue color as he glared at Triston but he didn't suspect Triston heard everything as he walked away. after the man left Triston ran to his room and got out his ancient book. As Triston put his hand on top of the book it began to glow and transformed into a different book.
Triston read the book and learned about the cybertronic universe.
The next day Triston left the house for school, instead of going to school he went to this (which building?) building and saw the man there (is this the same man with the blue eyes, you need to tell the reader and describe it), he followed the man to a room inside the building and then the mans eyes turned blue and his whitish (spelled whitish wrong) hair flowed backwards as a portal appeared. As the man walked into (you spelled into wrong) the (you missed the t on the) portal, (comma here as there's a slight pause) he disappeared. Triston was shocked, but out of curiosity, stepped through the portal as well. (changed this a little)
The portal lead Triston to another place, like (like, not liek) another world.
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